A few oldies

Discussion in 'Humor' started by rhodescholar, Jul 26, 2009.

  1. rhodescholar
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    rhodescholar Gold Member

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    An assortment for ya:

    The grade school principal dropped into the new 3rd grade teacher's room to see how she was adjusting to her first day of school. "There is one problem", she said "that little boy in the 1st row belongs in 2nd grade but insists on remaining here, and he's so smart I hate to send him back." "He can't be that smart" said the principal, "ask him something." The teacher called the boy forward and inquired, "What does a dog do on 3 legs that a man does on 2 legs and a lady does sitting down?" "Shakes hands" said the boy. "What has a cow got 4 of that I only have 2 of" she went on. "Legs" the boy replied. "What is a 4 letter word meaning intercourse?" she continued. "Talk" he answered. The teacher turned to the principal, "Well what should I do?" He drew her aside and whispered, "Better promote him to the 4th grade, I missed all 3 questions."
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    An old man walks into his doctor's office and says "doctor, I'm really having some family problems."

    The doctors asks, "what sort of problems"?

    "Well," says the old man,"I have a 22-year old wife."

    The doctor says "that great..."

    "...and she is really quite stunning."

    The doctor says "even better!"

    "and she wants to have sex with me 4 times a day."

    So the doctor says "that's wonderful, so, what the hell is the problem?"

    "I can't remember where I live."

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    A fat, ugly rich man walks up to a stunning woman in a party and says "for $1 million would you have sex with me?"

    The woman looks at him, thinks hard for a moment and replies: "ok fine, I'll do it."

    The man says: "alright, how about for $150"?

    She screams back at him: "no way, what kind of woman do you think I am"?

    He responds "after you agreed to fuck me for $1 million, we both knew what kind of woman you are - after that its just a matter of haggling for the right price..."
     
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