2 weeks my brother killed himself.. Sunday ..

[Lovebears65]

We bury his ashes on top of my dads grave.. and bought silver hearts and saved some ashes to put in each one for each sibling and my mother. The heart says always in our hearts and on the back says Troy and his date of birth and death .. My mother is not doing well at all. I call her every day and all she does is cry.. I want to be with her she lives 6 hours away. We are going again next weekend and try to go every weekend my hubby is off.. All my other siblings live in Pittsburgh so I am the nearest to her .. I wish she would move closer to us but her husband is from there and wont leave that area even though he is not close to any of his family... I am going on Oct 3 to go speak to a specialist to get out my feelings. I have too it to much to keep it all in. I talk to hubby about it but he works all the time and I really don't want to talk to the kids about it they just don't need to see me crying all the time.. My poor sister in law who found him is also not doing well if you could please say a prayer for my family it would mean so much to get through this tough time in our lives

 

[The Professor]

My son committed suicide in 2008. He was a few months shy of his 24th birthday. It took me five years to get over the heartache and to think of him without the tears.

It won't be easy and it won't happen overnight, but you will get through this.

I am sending healing thoughts your way.

 

[AyeCantSeeYou]

My heart goes out to you both, [MENTION=29383]Lovebears65[/MENTION] and [MENTION=28505]The Professor[/MENTION].

My brother-in-law did the same early one morning several years ago. He spent most of his military career in hostile areas. The Army listed him as a casualty of war due to PTSD.

When you catch yourself trying to come up with a reason 'why' this happened or telling yourself 'if I had only done this or said this it wouldn't have happened', get up and do something - anything - to get your mind off it; keep busy. Remember the good times.

 

[jon_berzerk]

im sorry to hear such sad news

we will keep you and yours in our prayers

 

[asaratis]

Time heals! When you go through sadness, remind yourself to recall good thoughts of the good times you had with you brother. The specialist may help you and I certainly hope so...but the will and the strength to overcome must be of your own doing.

 

[MHunterB]

Luv, everyone has their own 'timetable' for grief.... Each of your family will proceed at the pace that's right for them. Please don't let anyone tell you when they think you should be 'getting over it'.

I'm not sure if any of us truly gets over such a terrible sadness.....but we do find reasons to do something other than cry, eventually. And sooner or later, a bit of happiness sneaks back in while we weren't looking - and we find that we can laugh again : ))

My prayers are for you and your family, to find the strength you need now and to support one another.

Talking to a 'professional' at such a time is a really good idea: I hope it is helpful to you.

I cannot imagine your mother's suffering. I had a miscarriage before our son was born - and in a little corner of my soul I still pine for that lost May baby. Even though there couldn't have been both that baby and our November son........

BTW, people from Pittsburgh seem to be like that - very 'embedded' and reluctant to leave the area. I've got a SIL like that......

 

[Starlight]

My heart goes out to you, Lovebears. Will be keeping you and your family in my prayers, and will put a prayer card in also at my Church tomorrow. Hugs to you, Dear Lady.

 

[syrenn]

i am sorry lovebears. The grief and pain will pass with time.

 

[Toro]

I am so sorry to hear that. My prayers are with you.

 

[koshergrl]

Saying a prayer for you and your family. I hope your therapist can give you some good tools.

 

[boedicca]

Lovebear,

I'm sorry, too - what a horrible time for you and your family. I hope you start healing soon.

boe

 

[Foxfyre]

Lovebears, Professor and others, I join my prayers for strength and understanding that helps you get through the grief. Nothing anybody says can make it better. Sometimes all we can do is just stand by and feel with you and hope that helps our friend endure the pain.

A few months ago we buried a beloved young relative who literally drank himself to death. I don't know which is worse. Watching somebody do that to themselves or the cruel but quick way of finding them when we had no idea.

The counseling is probably a good idea for at least awhile, most especially if you don't have somebody you can unburden your heart with. It can help you know that it was not your fault and you couldn't have prevented it. Both are very real factors that creep into the grief process.

 

[Book of Jeremiah]

I'm asking the Lord to send you people who will listen. Not by the hour but by the day, week, month, year, for as long as you need it. Many are right here on this board. You are surrounded by love and love is the ultimate healer. There is much comfort in love. I'll be praying the Lord sends you the right counselors and listeners even where you live...

-Karen

 

[pacer]

Terrible tragedy! So sorry for your loss.

 

[Michelle420]

My sister committed suicide June 10th 2013, it;s the hardest death in my family I had to deal with this year. I also lost my dad and cousin a few months prior.

Prayers for you and anyone who is also going through the same thing.