Why do people have kids they cannot care for or afford?

High_Gravity

Belligerent Drunk
Nov 19, 2010
40,157
7,096
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Richmond VA
I have noticed that some of the people I know that have no business having kids or having anymore kids keep doing it, a friend of mine who lives in a house owned by his mother with his girlfriend has 2 kids with her. He has been unemployed for the past 3 years, his mother pays everything she is a nurse so she earns enough to support her grown son, she pays for food, their bills, his cell phone, even when the water heater broke she fixed it. Anyways I talked to my friend this past weekend and his girlfriend is now pregnant with their child, I didn't really know what to say because he has no business having more kids, especially since he has no job and spends alot of time smoking weed.

Another friend of mine is successful, he was in the Air Force with me and got out after 6 years and now has a job in Houston working for an electricity company and makes around $40-50 K a year, volunteers time to help with charities, goes to Church on Sundays, etc. but he is not interested in having kids right now, he likes being a free agent and doing what he wants. I should not he is 30 years old, but my friend with the 3 kids is 26. I notice a scary trend where the responsible people with a good head on their shoulders are not having kids as much, but the guy who lives with mom and hits the bong everyday has no problem having 4 or 5 kids, does anyone else notice this?
 
It's a matter of responsibility and accountability. These two values are becoming increasingly lost in our society, primarily do to the media and the government.
 
It's a matter of responsibility and accountability. These two values are becoming increasingly lost in our society, primarily do to the media and the government.

When you have more idiots having children than good people its a troubling sign, my brother is an ex heroin addict who has been in and out of prison for the past 3 years. He just did a 1 year bid in Wasco in California for domestic violence and a drug charge, he has 2 kids with my ex girlfriend, the kids were taken away by CPS because he beat them, did not feed them for days and one of them almost choked to death on a percosette he left out, he also beat the shit out his girlfriend and a no contact order was in place. Now he has 2 kids out there, what are they going to be like when they grow up? :confused:
 
I have noticed that some of the people I know that have no business having kids or having anymore kids keep doing it, a friend of mine who lives in a house owned by his mother with his girlfriend has 2 kids with her. He has been unemployed for the past 3 years, his mother pays everything she is a nurse so she earns enough to support her grown son, she pays for food, their bills, his cell phone, even when the water heater broke she fixed it. Anyways I talked to my friend this past weekend and his girlfriend is now pregnant with their child, I didn't really know what to say because he has no business having more kids, especially since he has no job and spends alot of time smoking weed.

Another friend of mine is successful, he was in the Air Force with me and got out after 6 years and now has a job in Houston working for an electricity company and makes around $40-50 K a year, volunteers time to help with charities, goes to Church on Sundays, etc. but he is not interested in having kids right now, he likes being a free agent and doing what he wants. I should not he is 30 years old, but my friend with the 3 kids is 26. I notice a scary trend where the responsible people with a good head on their shoulders are not having kids as much, but the guy who lives with mom and hits the bong everyday has no problem having 4 or 5 kids, does anyone else notice this?


First off... momma is enabling them to be lazy asses. Their very own private nanny state. Who would not want to live somewhere everything is paid for and done for them.

I agree... they have no business having more children that they cant afford.

Question... are they getting government assistance too?
 
I have noticed that some of the people I know that have no business having kids or having anymore kids keep doing it, a friend of mine who lives in a house owned by his mother with his girlfriend has 2 kids with her. He has been unemployed for the past 3 years, his mother pays everything she is a nurse so she earns enough to support her grown son, she pays for food, their bills, his cell phone, even when the water heater broke she fixed it. Anyways I talked to my friend this past weekend and his girlfriend is now pregnant with their child, I didn't really know what to say because he has no business having more kids, especially since he has no job and spends alot of time smoking weed.

Another friend of mine is successful, he was in the Air Force with me and got out after 6 years and now has a job in Houston working for an electricity company and makes around $40-50 K a year, volunteers time to help with charities, goes to Church on Sundays, etc. but he is not interested in having kids right now, he likes being a free agent and doing what he wants. I should not he is 30 years old, but my friend with the 3 kids is 26. I notice a scary trend where the responsible people with a good head on their shoulders are not having kids as much, but the guy who lives with mom and hits the bong everyday has no problem having 4 or 5 kids, does anyone else notice this?


First off... momma is enabling them to be lazy asses. Their very own private nanny state. Who would not want to live somewhere everything is paid for and done for them.

I agree... they have no business having more children that they cant afford.

Question... are they getting government assistance too?

His girlfriend works at Burger King, and they do receive some food stamps.
 
It's a matter of responsibility and accountability. These two values are becoming increasingly lost in our society, primarily do to the media and the government.

When you have more idiots having children than good people its a troubling sign, my brother is an ex heroin addict who has been in and out of prison for the past 3 years. He just did a 1 year bid in Wasco in California for domestic violence and a drug charge, he has 2 kids with my ex girlfriend, the kids were taken away by CPS because he beat them, did not feed them for days and one of them almost choked to death on a percosette he left out, he also beat the shit out his girlfriend and a no contact order was in place. Now he has 2 kids out there, what are they going to be like when they grow up? :confused:


I am sorry for your nieces and nephew... but they are better off without your brother. Hopefully they grow up better then their parents.
 
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I have noticed that some of the people I know that have no business having kids or having anymore kids keep doing it, a friend of mine who lives in a house owned by his mother with his girlfriend has 2 kids with her. He has been unemployed for the past 3 years, his mother pays everything she is a nurse so she earns enough to support her grown son, she pays for food, their bills, his cell phone, even when the water heater broke she fixed it. Anyways I talked to my friend this past weekend and his girlfriend is now pregnant with their child, I didn't really know what to say because he has no business having more kids, especially since he has no job and spends alot of time smoking weed.

Another friend of mine is successful, he was in the Air Force with me and got out after 6 years and now has a job in Houston working for an electricity company and makes around $40-50 K a year, volunteers time to help with charities, goes to Church on Sundays, etc. but he is not interested in having kids right now, he likes being a free agent and doing what he wants. I should not he is 30 years old, but my friend with the 3 kids is 26. I notice a scary trend where the responsible people with a good head on their shoulders are not having kids as much, but the guy who lives with mom and hits the bong everyday has no problem having 4 or 5 kids, does anyone else notice this?


First off... momma is enabling them to be lazy asses. Their very own private nanny state. Who would not want to live somewhere everything is paid for and done for them.

I agree... they have no business having more children that they cant afford.

Question... are they getting government assistance too?

His girlfriend works at Burger King, and they do receive some food stamps.

The the best thing for them is that the mother gives them all the boot. Sorry..i know that sounds harsh.. but what they are doing is using the mother.
 
It can be in part due to the fact, that in the abscence of any other more intellectually or economically stimulating activity, procreation is still the most basic biological function. Given no other distractions, and opprotunity, people will screw around, and kids are often the result.

Also take into account that those in the lower strata of society are also those who think less about consequences than those more educated/better off.
 
It's a matter of responsibility and accountability. These two values are becoming increasingly lost in our society, primarily do to the media and the government.

When you have more idiots having children than good people its a troubling sign, my brother is an ex heroin addict who has been in and out of prison for the past 3 years. He just did a 1 year bid in Wasco in California for domestic violence and a drug charge, he has 2 kids with my ex girlfriend, the kids were taken away by CPS because he beat them, did not feed them for days and one of them almost choked to death on a percosette he left out, he also beat the shit out his girlfriend and a no contact order was in place. Now he has 2 kids out there, what are they going to be like when they grow up? :confused:


I am sorry for your nieces and nephew... but they are better off without your brother. Hopefully they grow up better then their parents.

Its going to be a long road, I don't have a relationship with my brother at all I have not spoken to him in 4 years. I have never met these kids, my brother contracted hepatitis C from his stay in Wasco, and has problems with his veins because of years of heroin abuse. My dad recently spent $3000 to send him to a rehab in Utah, which he got kicked out of after 6 weeks.:doubt:
 
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It can be in part due to the fact, that in the abscence of any other more intellectually or economically stimulating activity, procreation is still the most basic biological function. Given no other distractions, and opprotunity, people will screw around, and kids are often the result.

Also take into account that those in the lower strata of society are also those who think less about consequences than those more educated/better off.

Thats the thing, my friend with the 3 kids, his mother is a nurse. She makes a fantastic salary and is educated, but her kids are totally not except for the daughter.
 


First off... momma is enabling them to be lazy asses. Their very own private nanny state. Who would not want to live somewhere everything is paid for and done for them.

I agree... they have no business having more children that they cant afford.

Question... are they getting government assistance too?

His girlfriend works at Burger King, and they do receive some food stamps.

The the best thing for them is that the mother gives them all the boot. Sorry..i know that sounds harsh.. but what they are doing is using the mother.

I know his mother and speak to her some times, she is scared to give him the boot because they will end up on the streets, my friend cannot get a job and has a DUI on his record which makes it harder and he just won't stop hitting the bong, she just wants to look out for her grand children.
 
When you have more idiots having children than good people its a troubling sign, my brother is an ex heroin addict who has been in and out of prison for the past 3 years. He just did a 1 year bid in Wasco in California for domestic violence and a drug charge, he has 2 kids with my ex girlfriend, the kids were taken away by CPS because he beat them, did not feed them for days and one of them almost choked to death on a percosette he left out, he also beat the shit out his girlfriend and a no contact order was in place. Now he has 2 kids out there, what are they going to be like when they grow up? :confused:


I am sorry for your nieces and nephew... but they are better off without your brother. Hopefully they grow up better then their parents.

Its going to be a long road, I don't have a relationship with my brother at all I have not spoken to him in 4 years. I have never met these kids, my brother contracted hepatitis C from his stay in Wasco, and has problems with his veins because of years of heroin abuse. My dad recently spent $3000 to send him to a rehad in Utah, which he got kicked out of after 6 weeks.:doubt:

I am sorry.. your bother is a lost cause. I hope you father doesnt waste anymore money on him..but on his gran-kids.

I think it may be time for you to introduce yourself to them if you want to make any kind of difference in their lives... regardless if your brother or the mother like it or not. They need some kind of positive family role models. How old are they anyway? Start slow... send birthday and christmas gifts. If you have the funds... take them for the weekend. You fly there or fly them to you.
 
It can be in part due to the fact, that in the abscence of any other more intellectually or economically stimulating activity, procreation is still the most basic biological function. Given no other distractions, and opprotunity, people will screw around, and kids are often the result.

Also take into account that those in the lower strata of society are also those who think less about consequences than those more educated/better off.

Thats the thing, my friend with the 3 kids, his mother is a nurse. She makes a fantastic salary and is educated, but her kids are totally not except for the daughter.


The problem is the mother. She handed them everything on plate. She made their lives easy.

She still is handing them their lives on a plate.....and making life easy.

Its time to fledge them from the nest.
 

I am sorry for your nieces and nephew... but they are better off without your brother. Hopefully they grow up better then their parents.

Its going to be a long road, I don't have a relationship with my brother at all I have not spoken to him in 4 years. I have never met these kids, my brother contracted hepatitis C from his stay in Wasco, and has problems with his veins because of years of heroin abuse. My dad recently spent $3000 to send him to a rehad in Utah, which he got kicked out of after 6 weeks.:doubt:

I am sorry.. your bother is a lost cause. I hope you father doesnt waste anymore money on him..but on his gran-kids.

I think it may be time for you to introduce yourself to them if you want to make any kind of difference in their lives... regardless if your brother or the mother like it or not. They need some kind of positive family role models. How old are they anyway? Start slow... send birthday and christmas gifts. If you have the funds... take them for the weekend. You fly there or fly them to you.

Thats going to be hard because me and their mother HATE each other, I used to see her when I lived in California and our last conversation was really nasty, she actually called me a ****** at 1 point. A few weeks later she started to see my loser brother. I think one of the kids is 3, the other is 1 and was born while he was locked up, my brother has not even seen these kids after he was released, now he is shacking up at my moms house in Virginia. The only reason I know about this is because my dad tells me. My dad basically supports the kids and her, he has spent a fortune on them in the last few years.
 
It can be in part due to the fact, that in the abscence of any other more intellectually or economically stimulating activity, procreation is still the most basic biological function. Given no other distractions, and opprotunity, people will screw around, and kids are often the result.

Also take into account that those in the lower strata of society are also those who think less about consequences than those more educated/better off.

Thats the thing, my friend with the 3 kids, his mother is a nurse. She makes a fantastic salary and is educated, but her kids are totally not except for the daughter.


The problem is the mother. She handed them everything on plate. She made their lives easy.

She still is handing them their lives on a plate.....and making life easy.

Its time to fledge them from the nest.

I agree with you, I would never enable my kids like that. At 1 point he was trying to join the Army but he failed the drug test twice, he just can't put down the bong.
 
His girlfriend works at Burger King, and they do receive some food stamps.

The the best thing for them is that the mother gives them all the boot. Sorry..i know that sounds harsh.. but what they are doing is using the mother.

I know his mother and speak to her some times, she is scared to give him the boot because they will end up on the streets, my friend cannot get a job and has a DUI on his record which makes it harder and he just won't stop hitting the bong, she just wants to look out for her grand children.


I understand her concern and love for the grankids..... but the boy and his girlfriend are losers. Sorry. If he has the money for drugs... he has the money to find an apartment.

She may want to try and take custody of them....and then give the son and girlfriend the boot.
 
Its going to be a long road, I don't have a relationship with my brother at all I have not spoken to him in 4 years. I have never met these kids, my brother contracted hepatitis C from his stay in Wasco, and has problems with his veins because of years of heroin abuse. My dad recently spent $3000 to send him to a rehad in Utah, which he got kicked out of after 6 weeks.:doubt:

I am sorry.. your bother is a lost cause. I hope you father doesnt waste anymore money on him..but on his gran-kids.

I think it may be time for you to introduce yourself to them if you want to make any kind of difference in their lives... regardless if your brother or the mother like it or not. They need some kind of positive family role models. How old are they anyway? Start slow... send birthday and christmas gifts. If you have the funds... take them for the weekend. You fly there or fly them to you.

Thats going to be hard because me and their mother HATE each other, I used to see her when I lived in California and our last conversation was really nasty, she actually called me a ****** at 1 point. A few weeks later she started to see my loser brother. I think one of the kids is 3, the other is 1 and was born while he was locked up, my brother has not even seen these kids after he was released, now he is shacking up at my moms house in Virginia. The only reason I know about this is because my dad tells me. My dad basically supports the kids and her, he has spent a fortune on them in the last few years.

Hugs... i am happy to see that you see all of this with truthful eyes. I know its not easy.

Hopefully the mother gets over what ever it is...and lets you interact with them at some point. I would still try... especially when they start to get older and understand.
 

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