We Need to Liven Up the Gardening Forum

Toro

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Sep 29, 2005
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This place has gotten pretty boring since the Russians used the word "Nazi" and were perma-pinked from the Twaf.

So to make this forum more interesting, what are your craziest gardening stories?

Sex, drugs, crime, rhododendrons. Don't hold back!
 
This should do it.....
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Oh, jeez. Now we’re gonna have to deal with the White Orchid Supremacists.
 
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While you're busy being bored this guy will decimate everything you got.
 
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While you're busy being bored this guy will decimate everything you got.

Tomato Hornworm are very easy to control, just pick them off

Holding back on Nitrogen fertilizer will reduce the problem anyway, which is why I NEVER fertilize my tomato plants, past adding some compost in the planting hole.
 
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While you're busy being bored this guy will decimate everything you got.

Tomato Hornworm are very easy to control, just pick them off

Holding back on Nitrogen fertilizer will reduce the problem anyway, which is why I NEVER fertilize my tomato plants, past adding some compost in the planting hole.
Relax. It was just a joke in response to the OP.
 
These things grow like weeds, they kind of are weeds but useful to fill space quickly. Easy maintenance you do nothing lol. They grow everywhere so you get them for free. Kind of lame but my sheds look a lot nicer during the summer with these growing around them.

dsc_6221.jpg
 
These things grow like weeds, they kind of are weeds but useful to fill space quickly. Easy maintenance you do nothing lol. They grow everywhere so you get them for free. Kind of lame but my sheds look a lot nicer during the summer with these growing around them.

dsc_6221.jpg
Toro is not going to like the way this thread is heading, but that's what he gets for trying to turn the gardening forum into something else.

Around here, which has always been rural but has slowly been losing even that population for a hundred years or more, there are plenty of places where there's nothing but scrub or empty fields and suddenly you'll see a bunch of day lilies or a cluster of old lilac bushes and maybe an ancient tree and there you will find an old cellar hole where the house used to be, and maybe behind that a handful of graves where the family buried their dead.

Day lilies and lilacs and antique tea roses are a sure indication that there was once a farm and a farm woman who prettied it up with flowers that have kept on surviving for longer than she, or her house--for over a hundred years, at times. It was how I found my great great grandfather's farmsite--from the tea rose bushes that are still growing on his grave at the cemetery. There is only one place in the area where those roses are growing now and there is a huge hedge of them. I went to the land records, and sure enough. So I knocked on the door of the house there, and they showed me where the farm house used to be.
These naturalized (not wild) flowers are amazing.
 
I have flowers all over the place. I went out an took pictures of my lilies popping before the sun came up. There's hundreds of pics but too many to show the whole process. Here's cliffnotes, though.

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This place has gotten pretty boring since the Russians used the word "Nazi" and were perma-pinked from the Twaf.

So to make this forum more interesting, what are your craziest gardening stories?

Sex, drugs, crime, rhododendrons. Don't hold back!

I have a few stories about live plant sacrifices...but it would be too disturbing for this venue.
 
These things grow like weeds, they kind of are weeds but useful to fill space quickly. Easy maintenance you do nothing lol. They grow everywhere so you get them for free. Kind of lame but my sheds look a lot nicer during the summer with these growing around them.

dsc_6221.jpg
Toro is not going to like the way this thread is heading, but that's what he gets for trying to turn the gardening forum into something else.

Around here, which has always been rural but has slowly been losing even that population for a hundred years or more, there are plenty of places where there's nothing but scrub or empty fields and suddenly you'll see a bunch of day lilies or a cluster of old lilac bushes and maybe an ancient tree and there you will find an old cellar hole where the house used to be, and maybe behind that a handful of graves where the family buried their dead.

Day lilies and lilacs and antique tea roses are a sure indication that there was once a farm and a farm woman who prettied it up with flowers that have kept on surviving for longer than she, or her house--for over a hundred years, at times. It was how I found my great great grandfather's farmsite--from the tea rose bushes that are still growing on his grave at the cemetery. There is only one place in the area where those roses are growing now and there is a huge hedge of them. I went to the land records, and sure enough. So I knocked on the door of the house there, and they showed me where the farm house used to be.
These naturalized (not wild) flowers are amazing.
I only came here because he said he planted a lot of hookers here...
 
I have creeper vines growing all along my fence line, and I don’t necessarily mind them, except that they are traveling inexorably toward my lilac bush, and I don’t want it strangled.

(I have very few gardening anecdotes)
 
These things grow like weeds, they kind of are weeds but useful to fill space quickly. Easy maintenance you do nothing lol. They grow everywhere so you get them for free. Kind of lame but my sheds look a lot nicer during the summer with these growing around them.

dsc_6221.jpg

If you feel the need to divide the plants, wear your gloves, as the roots of the plant will blister your bare hands!
 
These things grow like weeds, they kind of are weeds but useful to fill space quickly. Easy maintenance you do nothing lol. They grow everywhere so you get them for free. Kind of lame but my sheds look a lot nicer during the summer with these growing around them.

dsc_6221.jpg

If you feel the need to divide the plants, wear your gloves, as the roots of the plant will blister your bare hands!
The Japanese eat the roots, I hear.
The pitchfork you need to dig up daylily roots will give you blisters, too.
 
These things grow like weeds, they kind of are weeds but useful to fill space quickly. Easy maintenance you do nothing lol. They grow everywhere so you get them for free. Kind of lame but my sheds look a lot nicer during the summer with these growing around them.

dsc_6221.jpg

If you feel the need to divide the plants, wear your gloves, as the roots of the plant will blister your bare hands!
The Japanese eat the roots, I hear.
The pitchfork you need to dig up daylily roots will give you blisters, too.

The blossoms can be cooked and eaten.
 
These things grow like weeds, they kind of are weeds but useful to fill space quickly. Easy maintenance you do nothing lol. They grow everywhere so you get them for free. Kind of lame but my sheds look a lot nicer during the summer with these growing around them.

dsc_6221.jpg

If you feel the need to divide the plants, wear your gloves, as the roots of the plant will blister your bare hands!
The Japanese eat the roots, I hear.
The pitchfork you need to dig up daylily roots will give you blisters, too.

The blossoms can be cooked and eaten.
Kinda tough, I would imagine.

The orange ones that live forever only bloom for one day. Are the hybrids that are in different colors like that, too?
When I cut day lillies, I always make sure to get stems with plenty of buds, because the ones open today will close tonight and fall off tomorrow.
 

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