Trump defends decision to sign stimulus checks: "I want my name to be synonymous with the coronavirus!"

[Crepitus]

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Donald J. Trump vehemently defended his decision to have his name printed on millions of I.R.S. checks being issued to the American people, telling reporters on Wednesday, “I want my name to be synonymous with the coronavirus.”​

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Lashing out at critics of his decision, Trump said, “I have been working on this pandemic day in, day out, and I deserve total credit for it.”​

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He said that, by putting his name on the checks, “Whenever the American people hear about the coronavirus, the first thing they’ll think of is me.”​

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Asked about Trump’s decision to sign the checks, Dr. Anthony Fauci said, “I don’t think it was really necessary, since most people already associate the coronavirus with him.”​

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Former President Barack Obama said that he was “surprised” by Trump’s statement, remarking, “I had no idea that he knew what the word ‘synonymous’ meant.”​

Trump Defends Decision to Sign Stimulus Checks: âI Want My Name to Be Synonymous With the Coronavirusâ

Lashing out at critics, Trump said, “I have been working on this pandemic day in, day out, and I deserve total credit for it.”

www.newyorker.com

My son just got his 1200 direct deposited

Thanks Don

Thanks Nancy.

Thank Nancy for the human feces on san fran streets you mean

Nope. You should thank Nancy for your stimulus money.

Does Nancy sign Bill's into law or Trump

Do you even know

Does tRump write laws?

Fuck, can he even spell "laws"?

And Bill's what?

Your Trump derangement syndrome is showing. Have your doctor up your thorazine please

Lol, standard conservative tactic, when backed into a corner issue insults.

Loser.

So tell us did president Hillary trip while ducking any snipers today?

You dingbats don't have any sense of humor. Rumor has it they remove that part of your brain to make room for the chip.

Actually kid this is serious science something that you can not participate in. However my brain is pretty big so no chip would fit in the space so you are correct with that

Chip, Implanted in Brain, Helps Paralyzed Man Regain Control of Hand (Published 2016)

A new study of a 24-year-old man who broke his neck five years ago is the first account of limb reanimation in a person with profound paralysis.

www.nytimes.com

Nifty 50: THE "EYE CHIP" OR RETINA CHIP

www.nsf.gov

So, you're saying they did remove your sense of humor to make room for the chip.

Cool.

Nope I said my brain is so big that I do not have room for ear wax because my mind fills the space most people reserve for ear wax and everything inbetween

So, encephalitis. That explains a lot.

Sad.

You probably shouldn't have let them do brain surgery with a condition like that.

Please consult you Mommy with future rhetorical responses

Yours are crayon level at best

Sad that even at that level you can't keep up.

Poor kid.

I would like to keep up this conversation with you, however I can not consistently compete with your schoolgirl who dropped her ice cream cone tantrums. Good luck with your stock portfolio

You need me to buy you a new ice cream cone?