New law requires Texans to have counseling before being allowed to vote!

[DrLove]

AUSTIN (The Borowitz Report)—Governor Greg Abbott has signed into law a bill requiring all Texans to submit to counseling before being allowed to vote.​

​

The law mandates a counseling session and a twenty-four-hour waiting period before a voter is permitted to cast a ballot, Abbott explained.​

​

“Many people who think that voting is something they have to do haven’t gotten all of the information available to them,” he said. “There are many alternatives to voting, including not voting.”​

​

“Sometimes, a person is upset with their situation and thinks that voting is the only answer,” the Governor said. “A counselor can sit with them, pray with them, and help them make the right choice.”​

​

Answering critics who claim that the twenty-four-hour waiting period is designed to keep voters from casting their ballots in a timely fashion, Abbott said, “All we’re trying to do is make sure that voting is the right decision for them. Every day, I hear from people who voted for me who say that they’ll regret that decision for the rest of their lives.”​

New Law Requires Texans to Have Counselling Before Being Allowed to Vote

“Many people who think that voting is something they have to do haven’t gotten all of the information available to them,” Governor Greg Abbott said.

www.newyorker.com

 

[Gabe Lackmann]

Oh boy...the faggots and shitlibs are out in force against Texas now. Those demons lost a court battle...hear their shrieks....fuckin orcs.

 

[Moonglow]

Oh boy...the faggots and shitlibs are out in force against Texas now. Those demons lost a court battle...hear their shrieks....fuckin orcs.

Damn that faggot Texass legislature and governor! All hail the fascist Repubs who want you not to vote without paid counseling from their corral of counselors..and accredited hair stylist.

 

[ZZ PUPPS]

Would be a great time to check green cards and outstanding warrants as well.

 

[Gabe Lackmann]

Damn that faggot Texass legislature and governor! All hail the fascist Repubs who want you not to vote without paid counseling from their corral of counselors..and accredited hair stylist.

No abortions for YOU!

Get out!

 

[Moonglow]

No abortions for YOU!

Get out!

After I get my hair done.

 

[Moonglow]

Would be a great time to check green cards and outstanding warrants as well.

Do they show the need for counseling?

 

[Gabe Lackmann]

After I get my hair done.

OK....then GET OUT!

 

[esme]

AUSTIN (The Borowitz Report)—Governor Greg Abbott has signed into law a bill requiring all Texans to submit to counseling before being allowed to vote.​

​

The law mandates a counseling session and a twenty-four-hour waiting period before a voter is permitted to cast a ballot, Abbott explained.​

​

“Many people who think that voting is something they have to do haven’t gotten all of the information available to them,” he said. “There are many alternatives to voting, including not voting.”​

​

“Sometimes, a person is upset with their situation and thinks that voting is the only answer,” the Governor said. “A counselor can sit with them, pray with them, and help them make the right choice.”​

​

Answering critics who claim that the twenty-four-hour waiting period is designed to keep voters from casting their ballots in a timely fashion, Abbott said, “All we’re trying to do is make sure that voting is the right decision for them. Every day, I hear from people who voted for me who say that they’ll regret that decision for the rest of their lives.”​

New Law Requires Texans to Have Counselling Before Being Allowed to Vote

“Many people who think that voting is something they have to do haven’t gotten all of the information available to them,” Governor Greg Abbott said.

www.newyorker.com

Everyone has the right to vote. This will not hold up in court.

 

[Moonglow]

Everyone has the right to vote. This will not hold up in court.

it will if presented by the jester of Texican governance.

 

[DrLove]

Everyone has the right to vote. This will not hold up in court.

It's satire

 

[MisterBeale]

Gavin Newsom Tries To Woo Californians Back By Disguising State As Texas

Gavin Newsom Tries To Woo Californians Back By Disguising State As Texas

BLYTHE, CA—In a last-ditch effort to lure fleeing residents back to the state of California, Governor Gavin Newsom has decided to disguise his state as Texas.

babylonbee.com

"Howdy, y'all!" yelled Newsom to cars as they sped off, looking for greener pastures. "Yer goin' the wrong way! Texas is this way, see? We got lots of guns and ammo here! Barbecue too! And most importantly, we got FR-- FR--"

The governor was unable to continue as the word "freedom" got caught in his throat and he started gagging."

 

[esme]

It's satire

Didn't realize what forum it was in.

 

[Lysistrata]

How much counseling should a person be required by the state to undergo before they are allowed to buy a gun? Who will be licensed by the state to conduct this counseling? Is big-government-required counseling meant to determine whether or not a citizen has a screw loose?

 

[DrLove]

Gavin Newsom Tries To Woo Californians Back By Disguising State As Texas

Gavin Newsom Tries To Woo Californians Back By Disguising State As Texas

BLYTHE, CA—In a last-ditch effort to lure fleeing residents back to the state of California, Governor Gavin Newsom has decided to disguise his state as Texas.

babylonbee.com

"Howdy, y'all!" yelled Newsom to cars as they sped off, looking for greener pastures. "Yer goin' the wrong way! Texas is this way, see? We got lots of guns and ammo here! Barbecue too! And most importantly, we got FR-- FR--"

The governor was unable to continue as the word "freedom" got caught in his throat and he started gagging."

Gotta admit Beale, The Bee has some good satirists.

 

[MisterBeale]

How much counseling should a person be required by the state to undergo before they are allowed to buy a gun? Who will be licensed by the state to conduct this counseling? Is big-government-required counseling meant to determine whether or not a citizen has a screw loose?

 

[Lysistrata]

t

i am informed. Is your body owned by the state because you are a gun owner? You are telling me that the state and the politicians who run it own our American bodies. No one owns an American body but the American who is in it.

What is this bit of Americans being forced into "counseling" before they are allowed to exercise their rights? Who are these "counselors"? What ideology do they represent? Why would a government force its citizenry to be indoctrinated in an ideology?

 

[yidnar]

After I get my hair done.

done ! that'll be 14.95 $ ..