A good looking man walked into an agent's office in Hollywood and
said "I want to be a movie star." Tall, handsome and with experience
on Broadway, he had the right credentials.
The agent asked, "What's your name?"
The guy said, "My name is Penis van Lesbian."
The agent said, "Sir, I hate to tell you, but in order to get into Hollywood,
you are going to have to change your name."
"I will NOT change my name! The van Lesbian name is centuries old,
I will not disrespect my grandfather by changing my name. Not ever."
The agent said, "Sir, I have worked in Hollywood for years... you will
NEVER go far in Hollywood with a name like Penis van Lesbian!
I'm telling you, you will HAVE to change your name or I will not be
able to represent you."
"So be it! I guess we will not be able to do business together" the guy said
and he left the agent's office.
FIVE YEARS LATER..... The agent opens an envelope sent to his office.
Inside the envelope is a letter and a check for $50,000. The agent is awe-struck,
who would possibly send him $50,000? He reads the letter enclosed...
"Dear Sir, Five years ago, I came into your office wanting to become an
actor in Hollywood , you told me I needed to change my name. Determined
to make it with my God-given birth name, I refused. You told me I would
never make it in Hollywood with a name like Penis van Lesbian. After I left
your office, I thought about what you said. I decided you were right.
I had to change my name. I had too much pride to return to your office,
so I signed with another agent. I would never have made it without changing
my name, so the enclosed check is a token of my appreciation.
Thank you for your advice.
Sincerely,
Dick van Dyke
said "I want to be a movie star." Tall, handsome and with experience
on Broadway, he had the right credentials.
The agent asked, "What's your name?"
The guy said, "My name is Penis van Lesbian."
The agent said, "Sir, I hate to tell you, but in order to get into Hollywood,
you are going to have to change your name."
"I will NOT change my name! The van Lesbian name is centuries old,
I will not disrespect my grandfather by changing my name. Not ever."
The agent said, "Sir, I have worked in Hollywood for years... you will
NEVER go far in Hollywood with a name like Penis van Lesbian!
I'm telling you, you will HAVE to change your name or I will not be
able to represent you."
"So be it! I guess we will not be able to do business together" the guy said
and he left the agent's office.
FIVE YEARS LATER..... The agent opens an envelope sent to his office.
Inside the envelope is a letter and a check for $50,000. The agent is awe-struck,
who would possibly send him $50,000? He reads the letter enclosed...
"Dear Sir, Five years ago, I came into your office wanting to become an
actor in Hollywood , you told me I needed to change my name. Determined
to make it with my God-given birth name, I refused. You told me I would
never make it in Hollywood with a name like Penis van Lesbian. After I left
your office, I thought about what you said. I decided you were right.
I had to change my name. I had too much pride to return to your office,
so I signed with another agent. I would never have made it without changing
my name, so the enclosed check is a token of my appreciation.
Thank you for your advice.
Sincerely,
Dick van Dyke
