I buried my Son

My youngest son was riding his bicycle in the evening after work and was struck and killed by a car. He was in his early twenties. The driver was a young girl. No charges were filed against her. The police said she wasn't drunk or speeding, it was just a tragic accident. I had to fly to another state for the funeral. I am still in a state of shock. Children should bury their parents, not the other way around.

I've chosen for you the two below compositions, I hope they give you both strength and solace :smiliehug:

W. A. Mozart "Violin Sonata No. 21 in E minor, K. 304 (K300c)", which Mozart composed in 1778.

The below performance is from Henryk Szeryng on the violin and Ingrid Haebler on the piano.



Robert Schumann "Violin Sonata No. 1 in A minor, Op. 105", which Schumann composed in 1851.

The below performance is from Ara Malikian on the violin and Serouj Kradjian on the piano.

 
My youngest son was riding his bicycle in the evening after work and was struck and killed by a car. He was in his early twenties. The driver was a young girl. No charges were filed against her. The police said she wasn't drunk or speeding, it was just a tragic accident. I had to fly to another state for the funeral. I am still in a state of shock. Children should bury their parents, not the other way around.

So sorry for your loss Sunni. It's going to be a long process and I am praying for you and your whole family to have strength and be surrounded by loving and supportive people. (((((((((((((((((((HUGS))))))))))))))))) Love to you and your family.
 
My youngest son was riding his bicycle in the evening after work and was struck and killed by a car. He was in his early twenties. The driver was a young girl. No charges were filed against her. The police said she wasn't drunk or speeding, it was just a tragic accident. I had to fly to another state for the funeral. I am still in a state of shock. Children should bury their parents, not the other way around.

Old friend, I am so sorry. I have tears running down my face thinking about the loss of your beautiful boy. This is every parent's worst nightmare. You are definitely in my thoughts.

A friend of mine is burying her son on Monday. He was 16. Another tragic accident, where no one was at fault. The loss of those young people we know and love, who are so full of life and potential, is almost unbearable.

I don't have a lot of advice, but I encourage you to speak of him, and speak of him often. Remember the little joys of his company, his funny quirks, the beauty of his smile. I think our loved ones come very close when we remember them.

You will be in my thoughts and prayers. You are loved here. Reach out when you need us.
 
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My youngest son was riding his bicycle in the evening after work and was struck and killed by a car. He was in his early twenties. The driver was a young girl. No charges were filed against her. The police said she wasn't drunk or speeding, it was just a tragic accident. I had to fly to another state for the funeral. I am still in a state of shock. Children should bury their parents, not the other way around.
My God. There are no words to express how sad I am for you and your family.

My friend lost two of her 20-something sons in 2014, 9 months apart. Both were tragic accidents. It takes time. She is doing OK now with lots of help, rest and time to grieve and go through her process. She still has one child and he has recently married and will soon bring her a granddaughter. I hope your community surrounds you and lifts you up through all of this.

Here is me for you > :frown:
 
Sorry, Sunni. I know there is nothing to say that makes any difference right now. It is going to be a long hard road to recovery. Forget day by day, take it minute by minute and hour by hour. Just remember, the rest of your children/family still need you and are hurting too. That is a very important thing to remember when you are at your lowest. Sending you best wishes.
 
Sunni, when my friend was killed in a road traffic accident, I took some comfort from the following poem. I realise it's probably too early, but maybe later it will provide some comfort for you too:

Do Not Stand At My Grave and Weep

Do not stand at my grave and weep
I am not there.
I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow.
I am the diamond glints on snow.
I am the sunlight on ripened grain.
I am the gentle autumn’s rain.
When you awaken in the morning’s hush,
I am the swift uplifting rush
Of quiet birds in circled flight.
I am the soft stars that shine at night.
Do not stand at my grave and cry;
I am not there.
I did not die.

Mary Frye

Beautiful.
 
My condolences Sunni Man. This is probably the toughest thing you'll ever go through and I wish you peace. Remember and take comfort that one fine morning you two will be together again in Heaven.
 
A couple of things that actually may help. Write your son a letter. It really helps you to sort out your feelings because you are going to tend to feel like a ball of confusion when it comes to your emotional state. Writing out all of your feelings and accepting that these feelings "come with the territory" is very helpful and therapeutic (or at least it was for me). Writing was the most helpful thing. Write poetry if you like, write letters, writing things out and sorting them out really helps. It's probably too soon for that right now but when you are feeling that way, try it.
 
One more thing is to remember that you are not all alone in the world. There are others out there who are grieving the loss of their child/children too and know what you are going through. Don't be afraid to reach out. Sometimes it's easier to talk to someone who is not "emotionally involved" in your situation, as you might feel bad about laying the load on people who you are close to, even your family. Talk to your religious leaders, pray if that helps you, and even talk with a therapist or a neutral third party if need be. I wish you the very best and I know you will get through this. (hugs)
 
My youngest son was riding his bicycle in the evening after work and was struck and killed by a car. He was in his early twenties. The driver was a young girl. No charges were filed against her. The police said she wasn't drunk or speeding, it was just a tragic accident. I had to fly to another state for the funeral. I am still in a state of shock. Children should bury their parents, not the other way around.

First thing I thought about.

Did he enjoy riding bikes? Maybe find a way to make it safer for others? Make some good from so much bad?
 

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