Dr Fauci tricks Trump into believing there's no Easter this year!

[DrLove]

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Taking bold action to safeguard the health of millions of Americans, Dr. Anthony Fauci has tricked Donald J. Trumpinto believing that there is no Easter this year, Fauci has confirmed.​

​

After hearing Trump declare on Tuesday that he hoped to reopen the country on Easter Sunday, an alarmed Fauci decided to spring into action.​

​

“I ran down to my computer and mocked up a phony 2020 calendar with no Easter on it,” Fauci said. “Then I showed it to Trump and said, ‘There’s a problem with your plan, Mr. President. There’s no Easter this year.’”​

​

According to Fauci, Trump was initially baffled by the news. “How could that be?” Trump asked. “There’s Easter every year.”​

​

“This is a leap year,” the quick-thinking virologist replied.​

​

“I guess I didn’t know it worked that way,” Trump said. “I never go to church.”​

​

Fauci consoled Trump by telling him that, if all goes according to plan, the country could be reopened in time for Easter Sunday, 2021, a suggestion that Trump appeared somewhat reluctantly to accept.​

​

The esteemed epidemiologist said that his dealings with Trump have now entered a new phase. “I’ve given up on containment, and I’m just doing mitigation,” he said.​

Fauci Tricks Trump Into Believing There Is No Easter This Year

According to the epidemiologist, Trump was initially baffled by the news.

www.newyorker.com

 

[Tom Paine 1949]

Pretty funny!

Seriously, Trump fanatics don’t seem to realize Fauci got on Trump’s good side when he suggested closing borders for Chinese travelers at the very end of January, and he gave press conferences defending that move. Fauci is a pretty smart guy, and he has a tough job — like anyone competent and principled who must work with our President.

 

[Zander]

This is weak, uninspired satire that only works for Covfefe-16 sufferers....

 

[JGalt]

This is weak, uninspired satire that only works for Covfefe-16 sufferers....

Agreed. It's good that we have a President who is serious about the pandemic and is leading us through it.

Of course if Hillary had won instead, I probably would have died laughing by now, because of her stupidity and incompetence.

 

[DrLove]

Pretty funny!

Seriously, Trump fanatics don’t seem to realize Fauci got on Trump’s good side when he suggested closing borders for Chinese travelers at the very end of January, and he gave press conferences defending that move. Fauci is a pretty smart guy, and he has a tough job — like anyone competent and principled who must work with our President.

Agree - Let's just all pray that the Dithering Dotard doesn't fire him.

Can Anthony Fauci Survive in the Trump White House?

Our most reliable coronavirus expert has corrected the president—and could be on course for a head-to-head clash. Will Trump let it slide?

www.vanityfair.com

 

[miketx]

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Taking bold action to safeguard the health of millions of Americans, Dr. Anthony Fauci has tricked Donald J. Trumpinto believing that there is no Easter this year, Fauci has confirmed.​

​

After hearing Trump declare on Tuesday that he hoped to reopen the country on Easter Sunday, an alarmed Fauci decided to spring into action.​

​

“I ran down to my computer and mocked up a phony 2020 calendar with no Easter on it,” Fauci said. “Then I showed it to Trump and said, ‘There’s a problem with your plan, Mr. President. There’s no Easter this year.’”​

​

According to Fauci, Trump was initially baffled by the news. “How could that be?” Trump asked. “There’s Easter every year.”​

​

“This is a leap year,” the quick-thinking virologist replied.​

​

“I guess I didn’t know it worked that way,” Trump said. “I never go to church.”​

​

Fauci consoled Trump by telling him that, if all goes according to plan, the country could be reopened in time for Easter Sunday, 2021, a suggestion that Trump appeared somewhat reluctantly to accept.​

​

The esteemed epidemiologist said that his dealings with Trump have now entered a new phase. “I’ve given up on containment, and I’m just doing mitigation,” he said.​

Fauci Tricks Trump Into Believing There Is No Easter This Year

According to the epidemiologist, Trump was initially baffled by the news.

www.newyorker.com

 

[Tom Paine 1949]

It's good that we have a President who is serious about the pandemic and is leading us through it. Of course if Hillary had won instead, I probably would have died laughing by now, because of her stupidity and incompetence.

Actually, if Hillary had been elected and done and said exactly what Trump has done and said, I have no doubt you “would probably have died laughing by now, because of her stupidity and incompetence.”

 

[JGalt]

It's good that we have a President who is serious about the pandemic and is leading us through it. Of course if Hillary had won instead, I probably would have died laughing by now, because of her stupidity and incompetence.

Actually, if Hillary had been elected and done and said exactly what Trump has done and said, I have no doubt you “would probably have died laughing by now, because of her stupidity and incompetence.”

Hillary would have botched this horribly, just like she did Benghazi.

 

[DOTR]

I think it is the mention of Easter that drives these demons insane.

 

[Tom Paine 1949]

Hillary would have botched this horribly, just like she did Benghazi.

I have no idea how Hillary would have handled this. But probably the CDC teams in place when Obama left would still be in place operating effectively, the CDC Chinese-speaking expert working with Chinese virologists in Beijing would have been there getting the inside dope and passing it on, and the intelligence agency reports conflicting with what Trump was hearing from Xi would have gotten a much greater hearing. I despised Hillary, and I am not generally a fan of our intelligence agencies, but such are the facts...

 

[JGalt]

Hillary would have botched this horribly, just like she did Benghazi.

I have no idea how Hillary would have handled this. But probably the CDC teams in place when Obama left would still be in place operating effectively, the CDC Chinese-speaking expert working with Chinese virologists in Beijing would have been there getting the inside dope and passing it on, and the intelligence agency reports conflicting with what Trump was hearing from Xi would have gotten a much greater hearing. I despised Hillary, and I am not generally a fan of our intelligence agencies, but such are the facts...

Hillary's presidency would have just been a continuation of Obama's policies. During the 2009 outbreak of H1N1, Obama didn't even declare a national emergency until the death toll went way up. Let's look at how President Trump has handled this:

The first confirmed case of coronavirus in the United States was announced on January 21, 2020.

On January 31, 2020, President Trump ordered all Americans returning home after traveling in China’s Hubei Province to submit to a 14-day quarantine.

On Feb 3, 2020, President Trump orders a travel ban to China. Democrat Senate Minority Leader Chuck Schumer declares oversight is needed since President Trump is "overreacting."

Now let's compare it to President Obama's reaction to the H1N1 Swine Fly epidemic of 2009:

Spring 2009 – The H1N1 flu pandemic in the United States commonly referred to as “swine flu”, had spread into the US from an outbreak in Mexico.

April 2009

The CDC identified the first two H1N1 / Swine flu cases in California on April 17, 2009. On April 28, 2009, the director of the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention confirmed a 23-month-old toddler in Texas became the first official U.S. death of H1N1 / Swine flu.

May 2009

The H1N1 Virus had infected American citizens in all 50 states.

June 2009 – Two Months After The First U.S. H1N1 was confirmed:

There were a total number of 27,717 confirmed cases of H1N1. Toward the end of June, the number of deaths related to the virus in the US surpassed those of all other countries.
On June 25, the CDC released information revealing that there were more than likely over one million (1,000,000) cases of the disease in the US, most of which had not been reported or diagnosed.

As of March 9, 2020, there were 582 confirmed coronavirus cases in the U.S. (compared to Obama’s 27,717)

22 Americans Had Died of Coronavirus (compared to Obama’s approx. 1,000)

Coronavirus has been confirmed in 34 out of the 50 U.S. states (Compared to Obama’s handling that saw H1N1 in all 50 states within the first month)

Finally, SIX-MONTHS AFTER H1N1 had spread to all 50 States, on October 24, 2009, President Barack Obama declared a national emergency in the United States.

When President Barack Obama declared a national emergency on October 24, 2009, the CDC estimated that 4,000 Americans have died. 22 million Americans had been infected with the H1N1 virus.

Dec. 2009

Just 16 days later on December 10, 2009, the CDC reported that 50 million Americans or 1 in 6 people had been infected with the 2009 A H1N1 Virus. 6,000 additional Americans had died, bringing the total to 10,000. The H1N1 vaccine was just beginning to be widely distributed to the general public by several states.

Jan. 2010

On January 15, 2010, the CDC released new estimate figures for the H1N1 / Swine flu. 55 million Americans had been infected, and 11,160 Americans had died between April through mid-December, 2009.

March 2010

By mid-March 2010, the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention estimated that 59 million Americans contracted the H1N1 Virus, 265,000 Americans were hospitalized, and 12,000 Americans had died.

Hillary would have not handled this any better than Obama, nor would she have handles it any better than President Trump has.

 

[DrLove]

Your avatar is appropriate

But for You? I prefer THIS one since Jethro got him a 6th grade edjumukation!!

PS: You FAILED to provide a link on your timeline JGalt so we'll assume that you made it the fuk up.

 

[JGalt]

Your avatar is appropriate

But for You? I prefer THIS one since Jethro got him a 6th grade edjumukation!!

PS: You FAILED to provide a link on your timeline JGalt so we'll assume that you made it the fuk up.

Here ya go, shithead: How about this one?

Or this one...

Or this one...

Or this one...

Or this one...

Or this one...

Hell, mang. I have enough avatars to use a different one every day. Let me check my hard drive and see if I can't find a few more.

 

[DrLove]

Your avatar is appropriate

But for You? I prefer THIS one since Jethro got him a 6th grade edjumukation!!

PS: You FAILED to provide a link on your timeline JGalt so we'll assume that you made it the fuk up.

Here ya go, shithead: How about this one?

View attachment 315370

Or this one...

View attachment 315371

Or this one...

View attachment 315372

Or this one...

View attachment 315373

Or this one...

View attachment 315374

Or this one...

View attachment 315379

Hell, mang. I have enough avatars to use a different one every day. Let me check my hard drive and see if I can't find a few more.

YA, Pepe is cool - Removes all doubt as to your abject racism!

 

[JGalt]

Your avatar is appropriate

But for You? I prefer THIS one since Jethro got him a 6th grade edjumukation!!

PS: You FAILED to provide a link on your timeline JGalt so we'll assume that you made it the fuk up.

Here ya go, shithead: How about this one?

View attachment 315370

Or this one...

View attachment 315371

Or this one...

View attachment 315372

Or this one...

View attachment 315373

Or this one...

View attachment 315374

Or this one...

View attachment 315379

Hell, mang. I have enough avatars to use a different one every day. Let me check my hard drive and see if I can't find a few more.

YA, Pepe is cool - Removes all doubt as to your abject racism!

And?