Dr Fauci gently tells Donald why he can't hold a parade to celebrate his response to Corona!

[DrLove]

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Dr. Anthony Fauci spent several hours on Saturday gently explaining to Donald J. Trump why it would be “a bad idea” to hold a giant parade to celebrate the great job the President is doing to combat covid-19, Dr. Fauci has confirmed.​

​

Trump first raised the idea of a massive parade early Saturday morning, arguing that it would address the “biggest problem” created by the pandemic thus far: the lack of appreciation for his own efforts regarding it.​

​

“A parade would put Jay Inslee and that woman in Michigan in their place,” Trump bitterly insisted.​

​

As Trump began drawing up plans for a parade, a panicked Dr. Fauci interceded and tried to explain that such a celebration would be “much nicer” if held after the pandemic is over.​

​

“Would I still be able to have tanks?” a crestfallen Trump asked.​

“Yes, you could have tanks,” Fauci replied.​

“What about balloons?” Trump asked.​

“You can have all the balloons you want,” the virologist said. “I promise you.”​

​

Speaking to reporters, Dr. Fauci said he believed that, after laboriously explaining the situation to Trump, “I think I got through to him,” adding, “I’ve gotta lie down now.”​

Fauci Gently Tells Trump Why He Canât Hold Parade to Celebrate Great Job He Is Doing

Trump first raised the idea of a massive parade early Saturday morning, arguing that it would address the “biggest problem” created by the pandemic thus far: the lack of appreciation for his own efforts regarding it.

www.newyorker.com

 

[miketx]

 

[toobfreak]

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Dr. Anthony Fauci spent several hours on Saturday gently explaining to Donald J. Trump why it would be “a bad idea” to hold a giant parade to celebrate the great job the President is doing to combat covid-19, Dr. Fauci has confirmed.​

​

Trump first raised the idea of a massive parade early Saturday morning, arguing that it would address the “biggest problem” created by the pandemic thus far: the lack of appreciation for his own efforts regarding it.​

​

“A parade would put Jay Inslee and that woman in Michigan in their place,” Trump bitterly insisted.​

​

As Trump began drawing up plans for a parade, a panicked Dr. Fauci interceded and tried to explain that such a celebration would be “much nicer” if held after the pandemic is over.​

​

“Would I still be able to have tanks?” a crestfallen Trump asked.​

“Yes, you could have tanks,” Fauci replied.​

“What about balloons?” Trump asked.​

“You can have all the balloons you want,” the virologist said. “I promise you.”​

​

Speaking to reporters, Dr. Fauci said he believed that, after laboriously explaining the situation to Trump, “I think I got through to him,” adding, “I’ve gotta lie down now.”​

Fauci Gently Tells Trump Why He Canât Hold Parade to Celebrate Great Job He Is Doing

Trump first raised the idea of a massive parade early Saturday morning, arguing that it would address the “biggest problem” created by the pandemic thus far: the lack of appreciation for his own efforts regarding it.

www.newyorker.com

Don't worry. Trump is getting all the thanks he needs from the Left and especially Joe Biden come this November.

 

[JGalt]

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Dr. Anthony Fauci spent several hours on Saturday gently explaining to Donald J. Trump why it would be “a bad idea” to hold a giant parade to celebrate the great job the President is doing to combat covid-19, Dr. Fauci has confirmed.​

​

Trump first raised the idea of a massive parade early Saturday morning, arguing that it would address the “biggest problem” created by the pandemic thus far: the lack of appreciation for his own efforts regarding it.​

​

“A parade would put Jay Inslee and that woman in Michigan in their place,” Trump bitterly insisted.​

​

As Trump began drawing up plans for a parade, a panicked Dr. Fauci interceded and tried to explain that such a celebration would be “much nicer” if held after the pandemic is over.​

​

“Would I still be able to have tanks?” a crestfallen Trump asked.​

“Yes, you could have tanks,” Fauci replied.​

“What about balloons?” Trump asked.​

“You can have all the balloons you want,” the virologist said. “I promise you.”​

​

Speaking to reporters, Dr. Fauci said he believed that, after laboriously explaining the situation to Trump, “I think I got through to him,” adding, “I’ve gotta lie down now.”​

Fauci Gently Tells Trump Why He Canât Hold Parade to Celebrate Great Job He Is Doing

Trump first raised the idea of a massive parade early Saturday morning, arguing that it would address the “biggest problem” created by the pandemic thus far: the lack of appreciation for his own efforts regarding it.

www.newyorker.com

Your OP is about as dumb as they come. Boring too, not unlike a toothache that won't go away. What is it with your guys and girls, anyway? Every day is the same thing over and over, and over, and over. I mean who really cares?

Now this is a better story...

Porn star says she will sleep with the first person to cure COVID-19

"Russian Porn Star Lyubov Bushuyeva, known by her stage name as Lola Taylor, has promised to have sex with whomever cures the COVID-19 Corona Virus! "

Meet Lola Taylor: The porn gal whose gonna get it on to cure the Corona Virus

 

[DrLove]

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Dr. Anthony Fauci spent several hours on Saturday gently explaining to Donald J. Trump why it would be “a bad idea” to hold a giant parade to celebrate the great job the President is doing to combat covid-19, Dr. Fauci has confirmed.​

​

Trump first raised the idea of a massive parade early Saturday morning, arguing that it would address the “biggest problem” created by the pandemic thus far: the lack of appreciation for his own efforts regarding it.​

​

“A parade would put Jay Inslee and that woman in Michigan in their place,” Trump bitterly insisted.​

​

As Trump began drawing up plans for a parade, a panicked Dr. Fauci interceded and tried to explain that such a celebration would be “much nicer” if held after the pandemic is over.​

​

“Would I still be able to have tanks?” a crestfallen Trump asked.​

“Yes, you could have tanks,” Fauci replied.​

“What about balloons?” Trump asked.​

“You can have all the balloons you want,” the virologist said. “I promise you.”​

​

Speaking to reporters, Dr. Fauci said he believed that, after laboriously explaining the situation to Trump, “I think I got through to him,” adding, “I’ve gotta lie down now.”​

Fauci Gently Tells Trump Why He Canât Hold Parade to Celebrate Great Job He Is Doing

Trump first raised the idea of a massive parade early Saturday morning, arguing that it would address the “biggest problem” created by the pandemic thus far: the lack of appreciation for his own efforts regarding it.

www.newyorker.com

Your OP is about as dumb as they come. Boring too, not unlike a toothache that won't go away. What is it with your guys and girls, anyway? Every day is the same thing over and over, and over, and over. I mean who really cares?

Now this is a better story...

Porn star says she will sleep with the first person to cure COVID-19

"Russian Porn Star Lyubov Bushuyeva, known by her stage name as Lola Taylor, has promised to have sex with whomever cures the COVID-19 Corona Virus! "

Meet Lola Taylor: The porn gal whose gonna get it on to cure the Corona Virus

Trumpublicans should stay out of the Political Satire forum. Most sincerely lack even a rudimentary sense of humor.

Most normal folk aren't even slightly interested in sleeping with porn stars.

 

[Crepitus]

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Dr. Anthony Fauci spent several hours on Saturday gently explaining to Donald J. Trump why it would be “a bad idea” to hold a giant parade to celebrate the great job the President is doing to combat covid-19, Dr. Fauci has confirmed.​

​

Trump first raised the idea of a massive parade early Saturday morning, arguing that it would address the “biggest problem” created by the pandemic thus far: the lack of appreciation for his own efforts regarding it.​

​

“A parade would put Jay Inslee and that woman in Michigan in their place,” Trump bitterly insisted.​

​

As Trump began drawing up plans for a parade, a panicked Dr. Fauci interceded and tried to explain that such a celebration would be “much nicer” if held after the pandemic is over.​

​

“Would I still be able to have tanks?” a crestfallen Trump asked.​

“Yes, you could have tanks,” Fauci replied.​

“What about balloons?” Trump asked.​

“You can have all the balloons you want,” the virologist said. “I promise you.”​

​

Speaking to reporters, Dr. Fauci said he believed that, after laboriously explaining the situation to Trump, “I think I got through to him,” adding, “I’ve gotta lie down now.”​

Fauci Gently Tells Trump Why He Canât Hold Parade to Celebrate Great Job He Is Doing

Trump first raised the idea of a massive parade early Saturday morning, arguing that it would address the “biggest problem” created by the pandemic thus far: the lack of appreciation for his own efforts regarding it.

www.newyorker.com

The sad thing is I had to double check to make sure it was satire. It is perfectly believable.

 

[DrLove]

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Dr. Anthony Fauci spent several hours on Saturday gently explaining to Donald J. Trump why it would be “a bad idea” to hold a giant parade to celebrate the great job the President is doing to combat covid-19, Dr. Fauci has confirmed.​

​

Trump first raised the idea of a massive parade early Saturday morning, arguing that it would address the “biggest problem” created by the pandemic thus far: the lack of appreciation for his own efforts regarding it.​

​

“A parade would put Jay Inslee and that woman in Michigan in their place,” Trump bitterly insisted.​

​

As Trump began drawing up plans for a parade, a panicked Dr. Fauci interceded and tried to explain that such a celebration would be “much nicer” if held after the pandemic is over.​

​

“Would I still be able to have tanks?” a crestfallen Trump asked.​

“Yes, you could have tanks,” Fauci replied.​

“What about balloons?” Trump asked.​

“You can have all the balloons you want,” the virologist said. “I promise you.”​

​

Speaking to reporters, Dr. Fauci said he believed that, after laboriously explaining the situation to Trump, “I think I got through to him,” adding, “I’ve gotta lie down now.”​

Fauci Gently Tells Trump Why He Canât Hold Parade to Celebrate Great Job He Is Doing

Trump first raised the idea of a massive parade early Saturday morning, arguing that it would address the “biggest problem” created by the pandemic thus far: the lack of appreciation for his own efforts regarding it.

www.newyorker.com

The sad thing is I had to double check to make sure it was satire. It is perfectly believable.

And therein lies the problem with satire in the Age of Trump. In general, there must be an element of truth to make satire funny. But in Donnie's case, ya gotta go WAY out there to make sure people figure it out.

Can't count the number of times I've posted Borowitz and even The Onion and had Orangelings deny that the "news story" is true.

WASHINGTON—Taking drastic action to address the country’s critical medical supply shortages as well as rising jobless claims, President Donald Trump announced a plan Friday to retrain the nation’s 3 million unemployed Americans to work as human ventilators.​

​

“We’re going to put Americans back to work by teaching them to lock lips with infected coronavirus patients and pump air into and out of their lungs,” said Trump, who explained how the Department of Labor would be giving all out-of-work Americans an opportunity to take an accelerated training course to learn how to successfully provide ventilatory assistance to Covid-19 patients with their mouths.​

​

“States asked for help, and we’ve listened. This is going to save hundreds, potentially thousands of lives, and put our nation’s great service workers back on their feet. There are thousands of very, very sick people waiting across the country with their mouths gaping open.” At press time, Trump told reporters that if unemployment numbers continue to rise, that many of the jobless could take on roles as hospital beds.​

Trump Announces Plan To Retrain Nation’s 3 Million Unemployed Americans As Human Ventilators

WASHINGTON—Taking drastic action to address the country’s critical medical supply shortages as well as rising jobless claims, President Donald Trump announced a plan Friday to retrain the nation’s 3 million unemployed Americans to work as human ventilators. “We’re going to put Americans back to...

politics.theonion.com

 

[Crepitus]

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Dr. Anthony Fauci spent several hours on Saturday gently explaining to Donald J. Trump why it would be “a bad idea” to hold a giant parade to celebrate the great job the President is doing to combat covid-19, Dr. Fauci has confirmed.​

​

Trump first raised the idea of a massive parade early Saturday morning, arguing that it would address the “biggest problem” created by the pandemic thus far: the lack of appreciation for his own efforts regarding it.​

​

“A parade would put Jay Inslee and that woman in Michigan in their place,” Trump bitterly insisted.​

​

As Trump began drawing up plans for a parade, a panicked Dr. Fauci interceded and tried to explain that such a celebration would be “much nicer” if held after the pandemic is over.​

​

“Would I still be able to have tanks?” a crestfallen Trump asked.​

“Yes, you could have tanks,” Fauci replied.​

“What about balloons?” Trump asked.​

“You can have all the balloons you want,” the virologist said. “I promise you.”​

​

Speaking to reporters, Dr. Fauci said he believed that, after laboriously explaining the situation to Trump, “I think I got through to him,” adding, “I’ve gotta lie down now.”​

Fauci Gently Tells Trump Why He Canât Hold Parade to Celebrate Great Job He Is Doing

Trump first raised the idea of a massive parade early Saturday morning, arguing that it would address the “biggest problem” created by the pandemic thus far: the lack of appreciation for his own efforts regarding it.

www.newyorker.com

The sad thing is I had to double check to make sure it was satire. It is perfectly believable.

And therein lies the problem with satire in the Age of Trump. In general, there must be an element of truth to make satire funny. But in Donnie's case, ya gotta go WAY out there to make sure people figure it out.

Can't count the number of times I've posted Borowitz and even The Onion and had Orangelings deny that the "news story" is true.

WASHINGTON—Taking drastic action to address the country’s critical medical supply shortages as well as rising jobless claims, President Donald Trump announced a plan Friday to retrain the nation’s 3 million unemployed Americans to work as human ventilators.​

​

“We’re going to put Americans back to work by teaching them to lock lips with infected coronavirus patients and pump air into and out of their lungs,” said Trump, who explained how the Department of Labor would be giving all out-of-work Americans an opportunity to take an accelerated training course to learn how to successfully provide ventilatory assistance to Covid-19 patients with their mouths.​

​

“States asked for help, and we’ve listened. This is going to save hundreds, potentially thousands of lives, and put our nation’s great service workers back on their feet. There are thousands of very, very sick people waiting across the country with their mouths gaping open.” At press time, Trump told reporters that if unemployment numbers continue to rise, that many of the jobless could take on roles as hospital beds.​

Trump Announces Plan To Retrain Nation’s 3 Million Unemployed Americans As Human Ventilators

WASHINGTON—Taking drastic action to address the country’s critical medical supply shortages as well as rising jobless claims, President Donald Trump announced a plan Friday to retrain the nation’s 3 million unemployed Americans to work as human ventilators. “We’re going to put Americans back to...

politics.theonion.com

I've heard the tRumplings have that portion of their brains removed to make room for the chip.