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[rdean]

Hello Dad?

I'm voting for him aren't I?

It's me, Ted.

What do you mean Ted who? Ted Cruz.

From the debates.

(sigh) Lyin' Ted?

 

[rdean]

Mom, I know he's there. I can hear him crying.
Donald was just kidding. He knows Dad didn't kill..........Mom? Hello?

 

[IsaacNewton]

"Yes I'm calling about the two suits we dropped off to have cleaned...yes I'll hold... ...do I have the stub? Let me look...here it is. No, it was on the floor next to my balls, underneath my self-esteem."

 

[rdean]

Donald, your Taco Bowl is here.

 

[rdean]

"Yes I'm calling about the two suits we dropped off to have cleaned...yes I'll hold... ...do I have the stub? Let me look...here it is. No, it was on the floor next to my balls, underneath my self-esteem."

Oh, man. That was hilarious!

 

[IsaacNewton]

"hello, suicide hot-line, how may we help you?"

 

[IsaacNewton]

"Alright, I'll go in there for Dorothy. Wicked Witch or no Wicked Witch. Guards or no guards, I'll tear 'em apart. There's just one thing I want you guys to do. What's that?...talk me out of it."

 

[rdean]

I'm snowed in? But it's Christmas.

 

[SYTFE]

"Yes Mr. Trump, you may spank my ass and call me Sally."

 

[SYTFE]

God, check out the look on his face. That's the face of a grown ass man who no longer has an ounce of self respect. He will literally never recover. I almost feel sorry for him.

 

[Vandalshandle]

Honey, send the china back to Neiman Marcus. I thought that, if nothing else, it would make a nice gift for Donald, but it doesn't look like he needs anything with the presidential seal on it, either.

 

[tyroneweaver]

God, check out the look on his face. That's the face of a grown ass man who no longer has an ounce of self respect. He will literally never recover. I almost feel sorry for him.

Bill clinton looks as sytfefaced as you.

 

[emilynghiem]

The assassination failed? Dang, I hoped this was over!

 

[Vandalshandle]

"Hello? Chris? This is Ted. Say, I was thinking about starting this sort of a club, thing, and I thought of you...... Chris? Governor Christie...hello??"

 

[Vandalshandle]

"Hello? Trump Plaza? Yeah, this is Ted Cruz. Look, the reason that I am calling is that you canceled my reservation. Yes, I know that the presidential suite isn't available, but come on, my reservation was for the vice-pres........ Oh. I see................

 

[Vandalshandle]

"Yes, honey, I told you that I was going to take you to the inaugural ball, and I will. Donald has asked us to work out some of the logistics involving arriving and departing guest arrangements. Do you know how to drive a stick shift?"

 

[Vandalshandle]

"Hello? Acme printing? There seems to be a terrible mistake on the campaign signs we ordered. Now, we simply are not going to pay fo........hello?"

 

[Vandalshandle]

'"Hello, Mr. Trump? No? Well, look, tell him that Ted called, and I understand that the Postmaster General spot is still open.... Hello?"

 

[emilynghiem]

My name was found in Clinton's emails?
They didn't find my porno pics, did they?

 

[IsaacNewton]

"Hello Donald! Oh, I mean Mr Trump. Ok you want a huge bowl of M n M's and what else? You want me to remove all the brown ones. Ok sir, will do, it's so good to hear your voi...Hello?