You Know You're In Nocona....

Discussion in 'Humor' started by Jimmyeatworld, Apr 17, 2005.

  1. Jimmyeatworld
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    Jimmyeatworld Silver Member

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    You know you're in Nocona, Texas if....

    1-Everyone automatically assumes that you know everyone else in town.

    2-Sixty percent of the population was born and raised here. The other 40% hails from some northern state.

    3-A business will vacate any location and move to another building down the road just to say they've relocated.

    4-"Sitting at the car wash" is a social activity.

    5-There's a dirty, old, half empty section of town that is considered part of downtown.

    6-You can't comment on the hospital, road crews, or school administration due to the fact that they have WAYYYY to many issues to discuss.

    7-You will never have a problem finding someone with a cell phone.

    8-You understand the terror and depression associated with "rodeo weekend".

    9-Everyone smokes....and I mean everyone. Babies smoke in this town.

    10-The only place to see live music is the rodeo dance...that's sad folks.

    11-You have loyalty to one of the two major burger joints and feel kinda guilty if and when you eat at the other one.

    12-You forget about the third burger joint most of the time because it's "to far out".

    13-You have to deal with the stupidity of people coming in from every which angle on and off of Hwy 82 and the "Indian Bridge".

    14-A black person passing through town stops traffic.

    15-Carrying jumper cables in your car and measuring distances with minutes isn't only ok, it's required.

    16-If directions to a location usually start with something like, "You know where Bill Jones used to live? Well, that ain't it..."

    17-In order to gain employment at a gas station or fast food place, you must be able to miscount change.

    18-You've been warned your entire life to stay off of Lulu Bells Bridge.

    19-You refer to both Jaycee Park and Oak Shores as "the boat ramp".

    20-You see no problem having a conveniece store on every corner.

    21-You can't go out in public for more than 15 minutes without running into your friend, or their parents, or cousins, or a teacher, or other relative, or your friends ex, or some other person that you've met before but can't for the life of you remember their name.

    22-It's perfectly acceptible to have a $900 dollar stereo system in a $200 dollar car.

    23-You can kill someone but don't have to worry about getting caught as long as you do it between police rounds.

    24-You know something about at least one city official that would shame them into resigning in any other town.

    25-There are only two good roads and they are always the ones being worked on.

    26-You can always tell the new cop by how many people he pulls over in a day.

    27-You have your choice of 17 churches, but only one bar.

    28-If you lock your vehicle doors, but leave your back door open at night.

    29-You can't take a three mile jog without either passing a trailer house or an oil derrick no matter which way you go.

    30- The definition of stamina is being able to have 24 bottles of Coors Light and walk to your bed.

    31-You find entertainment in the brand name of your household toilet seat.......( Go Bemis!!! Its your birthday!!!!)

    32-When the umpires for pony league baseball consider the sport to be professional and actually try to fine players.

    33- When you have enough time to write things like this.....
     

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