Women Defined

[Ringel05]

The science of woman

Element: Woman
Symbol: Wo
Discoverer: Adam
Atomic Mass: Accepted as 50 Kg, but varies from 45 Kg to 250 Kg


PHYSICAL PROPERTIES.

1.- Surface usually lined with painted film (in the order of 0-6m to 0-3m).
2.- Boils at nothing, freezes without reason.
3.- Melts if given special treatment.
4.- Bitter if used incorrectly.
5.- Found in various states ranging from virgin metal to common ore.
6.- Yields to pressure applied at the correct points.

CHEMICAL PROPERTIES.

1.- Has great affinity for gold, silver, platinum and precious stones
2.- Absorbs large quantities of expensive substances.
3.- May explode spontaneously without prior warning and for no reason.
4.- Insoluble in liquids, but alcohol saturation increases activity.
5.- Most powerful income-reducing agent known to man.

COMMON USE.

1.- Highly ornamental, especially in sports cars.
2.- Can be a great aid to relaxation.
4.- Useful for general cleaning, scrubbing, washing, rubbing, etc.

TEST.

1.- Pure specimen turns pink when discovered in the natural state.
2.- Turns green when placed next to a better specimen.


HAZARDS.

1.- Highly dangerous except in experienced hands.
2.- Illegal to posses more than one.

You must spread some Reputation around before giving it to Colin again.

 

[Lumpy 1]

I just thought this was an interesting web site (Midlife Bachelor.com) and article for both the Guys and the Gals on the USMB board, the link is provided for definitions of each of the 14 types the author identifies.

Let me just add that, I see how certain Gals on USMB fit the definitions perfectly, at least my perceptions of them..

1) Party girl
2) High maintenance
3) Psycho
4) Dullard
5) Housecat
6) Housewife
7) Caterer
8) Stalker
9) Nymphomaniac
10) Jealous
11) Showgirl (attention whore)
12) Religious
13) The Boss
14) Jackpot

The 14 Types of Women

More misongynistic blather written by clueless boys for even more clueless boys.

What?

 

[Lumpy 1]

What the heck.. I thought I'd just dust this off and get my butt kicked a little more...

 

[mudwhistle]

Why the doubt...

Nobody likes being labeled or covey-holed....especially women.

The labels are interesting but I think some women could be a few of them or many of them depending on their mood.

One thing for sure....you're asking for trouble if you try to define one of God's greatest creations.

Now if you think that's a sappy answer or in any way patronizing....pffffft.

 

[Lumpy 1]

Why the doubt...

Nobody likes being labeled or covey-holed....especially women.

The labels are interesting but I think some women could be a few of them or many of them depending on their mood.

One thing for sure....you're asking for trouble if you try to define one of God's greatest creations.

Now if you think that's a sappy answer or in any way patronizing....pffffft.

How could I disagree with such brilliance..? Call me a trouble maker just out for some fun. Sure, there's consequences but I guess I'm just a little crazy also..