- May 20, 2009
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Why It’s Better To Be A Man – According To Big Black Dog
1. We can stand up to pee.
2. We don’t leak bodily fluids every 28 days or so.
3. If we’re in a pissy mood it isn’t because of something biological.
4. We aren’t afraid to scratch where it itches if we’re in public.
5. When we go shopping we know exactly what we want before we leave the house,
where to go to buy it, and how much it will cost. No marathons in Walmart.
6. When a warning light comes on in the dash we know to stop the car and turn off the motor.
7. It’s no big deal if the toilet seat is left in the up position.
8. We don’t bitch if we break a fingernail.
9. We don’t care if the neighbor sees us only in our undies.
10. If we run out of hot water in the shower it’s no big deal.
11. We don’t have to keep adjusting a bra strap.
12. If we bend over we don’t need to worry about somebody looking down our top.
13. We can be ready to go anywhere in just 10 minutes or less.
14. We look better bald.
15. We don’t make a big deal out of a few gray hairs.
16. We never worry about our panty line showing.
17. During sex we get to ask “Who’s your Daddy?”
18. We don’t collect spoons or dishes. We collect power tools!
19. We completely understand the game of football.
20. Fish fear us. Women want us!
21. It’s better to cuddle up with us on a cold winter’s night than a book.
22. We look better with a mustache then women do.
23. We can explain how a car’s motor works.
24. There are very few problems that a six-pack of cold beer can’t solve for us.
25. We fully understand the importance of NASCAR.
26. Poker with the guys is better than tea with the ladies.
27. It doesn’t take 20 minutes for us to decide on what to wear.
28. We never have to ask “Does this dress make me look fat?”
29. We understand why a dog likes humping your leg!
30. We sound better saying “Yes, dear.”
1. We can stand up to pee.
2. We don’t leak bodily fluids every 28 days or so.
3. If we’re in a pissy mood it isn’t because of something biological.
4. We aren’t afraid to scratch where it itches if we’re in public.
5. When we go shopping we know exactly what we want before we leave the house,
where to go to buy it, and how much it will cost. No marathons in Walmart.
6. When a warning light comes on in the dash we know to stop the car and turn off the motor.
7. It’s no big deal if the toilet seat is left in the up position.
8. We don’t bitch if we break a fingernail.
9. We don’t care if the neighbor sees us only in our undies.
10. If we run out of hot water in the shower it’s no big deal.
11. We don’t have to keep adjusting a bra strap.
12. If we bend over we don’t need to worry about somebody looking down our top.
13. We can be ready to go anywhere in just 10 minutes or less.
14. We look better bald.
15. We don’t make a big deal out of a few gray hairs.
16. We never worry about our panty line showing.
17. During sex we get to ask “Who’s your Daddy?”
18. We don’t collect spoons or dishes. We collect power tools!
19. We completely understand the game of football.
20. Fish fear us. Women want us!
21. It’s better to cuddle up with us on a cold winter’s night than a book.
22. We look better with a mustache then women do.
23. We can explain how a car’s motor works.
24. There are very few problems that a six-pack of cold beer can’t solve for us.
25. We fully understand the importance of NASCAR.
26. Poker with the guys is better than tea with the ladies.
27. It doesn’t take 20 minutes for us to decide on what to wear.
28. We never have to ask “Does this dress make me look fat?”
29. We understand why a dog likes humping your leg!
30. We sound better saying “Yes, dear.”
