Who's English is the best here?

[Comrade Johnson]

Please list all candidates. Foreigners are not counted, I want to speak pure American English

 

[Pogo]

Me. You've already asked this and I've already told you.

My English is so good that my "mistakes" are on porpoise. Which is kinda fishy.

See what I did there?

Not only am I an experienced writer/editor but my spoken English is standard "broadcast" American English, which I had to learn for that profession. Although I can and do mimic a few regional accents if code-switching is called for.

I should add that I'm a linguistic archconservative. I'm probably the only person left still using the traditional spelling of Hallowe'en.

 

[Comrade Johnson]

Me. You've already asked this and I've already told you.

Sure, sure, but I'd like several guys (and maybe some ladies) to copy so that I wouldn't sound like you completely

 

[Ringel05]

Por favor, presione uno para inglés.

 

[Comrade Johnson]

ese empuje para el español?

 

[yiostheoy]

Please list all candidates. Foreigners are not counted, I want to speak pure American English

Moi.

I taught technical writing at the university level to undergraduates while I was in grad school.

What is your next question ?!

 

[percysunshine]

Me. You've already asked this and I've already told you.

Sure, sure, but I'd like several guys (and maybe some ladies) to copy so that I wouldn't sound like you completely

.
Add some y'alls to your speech if you want real American and not that snooty yankee english stuff.

 

[Darkwind]

Shiiiiit, maaaaan. That honky muf' be messin' mah old lady... got to be runnin' cold upside down his head, you know?

Hey home', I can dig it. Know ain't gonna lay no mo' big rap up on you, man!

I say hey, sky... subba say I wan' see...

Uh-huh.

...pray to J I did the same-ol', same-ol'!

Hey... knock a self a pro, Slick! That gray matter backlot perform us DOWN, I take TCB-in', man!

Hey, you know what they say: see a broad to get dat booty yak 'em...

...leg 'er down a smack 'em yak 'em!

COL' got to be! Y'know? Shiiiiit.

 

[yiostheoy]

Me. You've already asked this and I've already told you.

My English is so good that my "mistakes" are on porpoise. Which is kinda fishy.

See what I did there?

Not only am I an experienced writer/editor but my spoken English is standard "broadcast" American English, which I had to learn for that profession. Although I can and do mimic a few regional accents if code-switching is called for.

I should add that I'm a linguistic archconservative. I'm probably the only person left still using the traditional spelling of Hallowe'en.

It was called "Hallowed Evening" originally.

 

[Ringel05]

ese empuje para el español?

press one for.......

 

[yiostheoy]

Me. You've already asked this and I've already told you.

Sure, sure, but I'd like several guys (and maybe some ladies) to copy so that I wouldn't sound like you completely

.
Add some y'alls to your speech if you want real American and not that snooty yankee english stuff.

I actually put this onto a test for college students as a bonus question.

Only one girl from Dallas got the right answer:

"What is the plural of y'all?"

 

[Comrade Johnson]

Please list all candidates. Foreigners are not counted, I want to speak pure American English

Moi.

I taught technical writing at the university level to undergraduates while I was in grad school.

What is your next question ?!

who is the number three here, of course

Me. You've already asked this and I've already told you.

Sure, sure, but I'd like several guys (and maybe some ladies) to copy so that I wouldn't sound like you completely

.
Add some y'alls to your speech if you want real American and not that snooty yankee english stuff.

Add what? And what is the difference between Americans and Yankees?

 

[CrusaderFrank]

Please list all candidates. Foreigners are not counted, I want to speak pure American English

Who's?

LOL

Who's line is it anyway

LOL

 

[Comrade Johnson]

ese empuje para el español?

press one for.......

done.

 

[yiostheoy]

Me. You've already asked this and I've already told you.

Sure, sure, but I'd like several guys (and maybe some ladies) to copy so that I wouldn't sound like you completely

Dichotomy primer list in English:

Guys / Gals

Boys / Girls

Youths / Young ladies

Men / Women

Gentlemen / Ladies

Males / Females

 

[yiostheoy]

Please list all candidates. Foreigners are not counted, I want to speak pure American English

Who's?

LOL

Who's line is it anyway

LOL

Uncle Vlad (Putin) wants to know.

Comrade Johnson is a Russian journalist in Moscow.

 

[percysunshine]

Shiiiiit, maaaaan. That honky muf' be messin' mah old lady... got to be runnin' cold upside down his head, you know?

Hey home', I can dig it. Know ain't gonna lay no mo' big rap up on you, man!

I say hey, sky... subba say I wan' see...

Uh-huh.

...pray to J I did the same-ol', same-ol'!

Hey... knock a self a pro, Slick! That gray matter backlot perform us DOWN, I take TCB-in', man!

Hey, you know what they say: see a broad to get dat booty yak 'em...

...leg 'er down a smack 'em yak 'em!

COL' got to be! Y'know? Shiiiiit.

 

[Comrade Johnson]

Dichotomy primer list in English:

Guys / Gals

Boys / Girls

Youths / Young ladies

Men / Women

Gentlemen / Ladies

Males / Females

Idiots/ ?

 

[Darkwind]

Shiiiiit, maaaaan. That honky muf' be messin' mah old lady... got to be runnin' cold upside down his head, you know?

Hey home', I can dig it. Know ain't gonna lay no mo' big rap up on you, man!

I say hey, sky... subba say I wan' see...

Uh-huh.

...pray to J I did the same-ol', same-ol'!

Hey... knock a self a pro, Slick! That gray matter backlot perform us DOWN, I take TCB-in', man!

Hey, you know what they say: see a broad to get dat booty yak 'em...

...leg 'er down a smack 'em yak 'em!

COL' got to be! Y'know? Shiiiiit.

Yep....lol

 

[yiostheoy]

Please list all candidates. Foreigners are not counted, I want to speak pure American English

Very few people realize there is actually quite a difference between British English and American English.

And then there is also Canuck English, Auzzie English, and Kiwi English too.

In Boston they don't pronounce the "R".

In the South they drawl their vowels.