There have been a lot of threads about sex, lately, and I've even started one or two! I've heard a few guys mention that it's difficult to get their wives in the mood. I feel for you, guys, but I can sympathize with your wives, too. Especially if they are SAHMs. If your wives are Christians, they might be able to relate to my story. After having several kids, being surrounded by children all day, and not having much to exercise our mental faculties, women can really begin to feel dehumanized. We spent the entire day serving others, and the last things on our minds is putting out even MORE effort. Women will gather or talk on the phone, and empathize, commiserating about their exhaustion, supporting each other in the resistance to sex. We even work up the attitude that we DESERVE to be left alone. We need a break. But, my best friend and I are odd women, maybe. We would engage in the opposition effort, but we both felt a little guilty about it. After a lot of talk, prayer, and Bible reading, we decided to resist the resistance. One of us came across this verse: The wife's body does not belong to her alone but also to her husband. In the same way, the husband's body does not belong to him alone but also to his wife. (1 Corinthians 7:4) And also, this verse: But for Adam no suitable helper was found...For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh. (Genesis 2:20b-24) The second passage really struck me. The act of sex is what defines marriage, what makes it different from any other relationship. Couple that with the fact that my body no longer belongs to me alone, and I come up with a DUTY to give sex. My best friend agreed, and we began a tiny little support group. We encouraged each other and prayed for each other and kept each other accountable. We agreed that we shouldn't go more than 3 days without "giving it up." Amazingly, after disciplining ourselves in this way, our husbands started to repond to us. Be a little nicer to us, a little more helpful. And we even (gasp) started to ENJOY it again! Guys, if your wife is a SAHM, a mother of small children, and she is resisting sex, this might be why: She needs to be pampered. She spends much or most of her time taking care of others. If you want her to open up to you in sex, make her feel protected, taken care of. (yes, I know that was really poor grammar, but you get the idea! )Do some housework without expecting anything in return. Rub her feet, buy her flowers, take care of the kids, whatever she seems to appreciate, without expecting anything in return. Women need to relax before they can get in the mood. Taking charge of some little things reinforces your manliness, your leadership, and thus opens HER up to be "the woman" once again. Just something I've been through, and thought others might be able to relate.