What You Do to Annoy Your Dog

I amuse my kids by saying nasty things to my dog in a sweet, kind, gentle and loving voice.

They laugh like hyenas, and the dog thinks I'm telling it that it's the best critter ever put on Earth by the God of Dogs.

I just hope the bitch never figures out what I'm actually saying. :D
 
Serving food at an improper temperature. Dre the bottomless Pit Bull eats twice a day. He gets a 4 qt stainless bowl(must be freshly cleaned) filled with fresh cooked pasta or rice with a dozen meatballs, a pound of cooked(braised) seasoned chicken breast, a dozen slices of pepperoni, a handful of cooked ham, some cooked chicken or pork bones all stirred up in a tasty sauce of butter and bacon or chicken fat drippings. Micro wave till hot and add water to cool the resulting pasta stew. As good as all that sounds even to a human....If it is too cold he turns his nose up at it...Too hot he will pull the meat chunks out on the floor to cool off leaving a mess. If it is just right he wolfs down the whole bowlful in less than two minutes.
 
Our dog loved getting in the car... she hated when the car began to move

she loved to go for a walk... but only to the end of the driveway

she loved to sleep on the couch... but only if there was someone to lie on

she loved whatever we were eating.. unless we were done and didn't want it

she loved to sleep in my bed... but only if I was in it

...our dog was a bitch
 
i keep them in the house till 6 am...that just kills them.....but when let out ...they run to the neighbors house down the road and get his two labs to bark like hell..waking them and the kids up...neighbor is good with 6 am...not good with 5 am...dogs like to go out at 5 am
 
I never annoy the dog, I save that for the cat. ;)

For the car ride thing? We we first got Penny we were told she didn't like car rides at all. Well I started taking her with me on short trips -- like dropping the kids off at the bus stop. And? Now she LOVES car rides! Don't make the mistake of ONLY taking them for a ride when they have to go to the V-E-T. They will obviously associate car=vet and you just created a problem. Try starting with small trips, around the block, down the road, etc. and expand it out. Penny will start to whine if we go somewhere not in her routine. I took her with me to the post office yesterday and she got whiny when she realized she didn't know where she was going. I had just had her at the vet the previous day for a teeth cleaning maybe she thought I was taking her back. I hopped out at the post office, mailed my letter, jumped back in the car and went home. She was fine on the ride home, no whiny at all.
 
My dog does seem miffed when I take a few moments off from being her full-time personal-care-attendent, that is true.

If God is truly just I'll be reincarnated as one of my pets.
 
I shouldn't just blame the dogs...I do annoy the cats as well...


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^^^ No, my animals have me well trained...most of the time I don't even realized I've been manipulated until days later ;)
 
Serving food at an improper temperature. Dre the bottomless Pit Bull eats twice a day. He gets a 4 qt stainless bowl(must be freshly cleaned) filled with fresh cooked pasta or rice with a dozen meatballs, a pound of cooked(braised) seasoned chicken breast, a dozen slices of pepperoni, a handful of cooked ham, some cooked chicken or pork bones all stirred up in a tasty sauce of butter and bacon or chicken fat drippings. Micro wave till hot and add water to cool the resulting pasta stew. As good as all that sounds even to a human....If it is too cold he turns his nose up at it...Too hot he will pull the meat chunks out on the floor to cool off leaving a mess. If it is just right he wolfs down the whole bowlful in less than two minutes.


I know that dog shits like mad. Before my boy Buster died, If I so much as gave him lunch meat his ass would explode. I would also stuff slices of habenero pepper in an egg role and let him steal it off my plat when he thought I was not looking. He would eat it any way but you could tell he regretted it when he took a shit.
 

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