What Women Want

[dilloduck]

No, but that seems to be the case in most relationships. A smart wife learns what pleases her husband. The time along he requires, the favorite meal he likes, and sacrafices sometimes her own wants/needs to please him. Too many times men expect this rather than reciprocate.

In these threads there's alot of wise information if we care to learn from it.

most relationships?---the woman makes all the sacrifices and the man doesn't.

 

[Joz]

most relationships?---the woman makes all the sacrifices and the man doesn't.

That's not what I said.

 

[dilloduck]

That's not what I said.

sorry ---- I don't understand then.

 

[Nienna]

most relationships?---the woman makes all the sacrifices and the man doesn't.

Guess it depends on the couple.

 

[dilloduck]

Guess it depends on the couple.

Agreed

 

[dmp]

I'm more of the mind that people should really be responsible for thier own happiness--whatever you get from someone else is just icing on the cake---but like I said--this thread is what WOMEN want.

That's fine for individuals. A marriage doesn't consist of two individuals - but two people sharing one life, sorta. It'd different.

Here I go - pot-kettle-black - but I'd say most divorces occurr because people are too focused on what makes THEM happy. What would make a typical woman happy? If I put her happiness above me. When she's happy, I'm happy. funny how that works.

 

[krisy]

That's fine for individuals. A marriage doesn't consist of two individuals - but two people sharing one life, sorta. It'd different.

Here I go - pot-kettle-black - but I'd say most divorces occurr because people are too focused on what makes THEM happy. What would make a typical woman happy? If I put her happiness above me. When she's happy, I'm happy. funny how that works.

I try to find somewhere in the middle. I do things for him,he does things for me. Ultimately,I am happy when my kids and husband are happy!!!

 

[dilloduck]

That's fine for individuals. A marriage doesn't consist of two individuals - but two people sharing one life, sorta. It'd different.

Here I go - pot-kettle-black - but I'd say most divorces occurr because people are too focused on what makes THEM happy. What would make a typical woman happy? If I put her happiness above me. When she's happy, I'm happy. funny how that works.

I didn't say try to make yourself happy---I said be responsible for your own happiness. Why is it that after people marry they all of the sudden expect thier mate to take care of them emotionally ? If you feel insecure, not special etc. why blame your spouse for it ?

 

[dmp]

I didn't say try to make yourself happy---I said be responsible for your own happiness. Why is it that after people marry they all of the sudden expect thier mate to take care of them emotionally ? If you feel insecure, not special etc. why blame your spouse for it ?

Let me put it a way you might understand - If, in a marriage, One spouse would take a little responsibility for their mate's happiness, things would go a lot better.

 

[dilloduck]

Let me put it a way you might understand - If, in a marriage, One spouse would take a little responsibility for their mate's happiness, things would go a lot better.

Rephrasing it makes much more sense and I agree with your statement. It's just that in so many situations, one spouse begins to ignore the personal responsiblilty for themselves and instead of being mature about and accepting it, they blame thier spouse. Married people are supposed to be mature enough to raise children which requires personal sacrifice and responsibility.
If you make yourself a "low-maintainance" person, you are much more likely to be a burden on your spouse. That's a pretty loving thing to do.

 

[Joz]

Rephrasing it makes much more sense and I agree with your statement. It's just that in so many situations, one spouse begins to ignore the personal responsiblilty for themselves and instead of being mature about and accepting it, they blame thier spouse.......
If you make yourself a "low-maintainance" person, you are much more likely to be a burden on your spouse. That's a pretty loving thing to do.

These two things were probably evident before marriage. But maybe not quite so pronounced.

Married people are supposed to be mature enough to raise children which requires personal sacrifice and responsibility.

This is an entirely different subject.

 

[dilloduck]

These two things were probably evident before marriage. But maybe not quite so pronounced.

This is an entirely different subject.

If you can't be responsible for youself, how do you teach kids to do that?

 

[Joz]

If you can't be responsible for youself, how do you teach kids to do that?

I misunderstood your initial line of thinking. I see where you're going with this. Can't argue your point.