What twisted person would wear this stuff??

Said1 said:
Puullleease, as if you didn't laugh. And besides, I don't make them up, I just repeat them. Don't shoot the messenger. :p:
I never laugh!
 
MtnBiker said:
Of course, speaking of Jack I think we jacked this thread from Fuzzy, sorry Fuzzy.

don't apologize, i love those jokes, plus i am not one to care if a thread goes off course. I have done that many times myself.

my mom told those jokes to me when i was younger. i used to have them all memorized, but now i only remember a few of them.
 
fuzzykitten99 said:
my mom told those jokes to me when i was younger. i used to have them all memorized, but now i only remember a few of them.

So did mine! Those and "mommy mommy" jokes are her trade marks.

"Mommy, Mommy! I keep running in circles."

"Shut up or I'll nail your other foot to the floor" :laugh:
 
Here are the ones I remember (sorry if there's a repeat somewhere)

-What do you call a man w/ no arms and no legs on your doorstep?
Matt
-What do you call a man w/ no arms and no legs in deep water?
Bob
-What do you call a man w/ no arms and no legs in shallow water?
Wade
-What do you call 2 men w/ no arms and no legs hanging over your window?
Curt 'n Rod
-What do you call a man w/ no arms and no legs in your mailbox?
Bill
-What do you call a man w/ no arms and no legs in your oven?
Crispin'
-What do you call a man w/ no arms and no legs in a tiger cage?
Claude
 
Q. How Many Dogs Does It Take to Change A Light Bulb?
A1. Golden Retriever: The sun is shining, the day is young, we've got our
whole lives ahead of us, and you're inside worrying about a stupid
burned out bulb?
A2. Border Collie: Just one. And then I'll replace any wiring that's not
up to code.
A3. Dachshund: You know I can't reach that stupid lamp!
A4. Rottweiler: Make me.
A5. Boxer: Who cares? I can still play with my squeaky toys in the dark.
A6. Lab: Oh, me, me!!!!! Pleeeeeeeeeze let me change the light bulb! Can
I? Can I? Huh? Huh? Huh? Can I? Pleeeeeeeeeze, please, please, please!
A7. German Shepherd: I'll change it as soon as I lead these people from
the dark, check to make sure I haven't missed any, and make just one
more perimeter patrol to see that no one has tried to take advantage of
the situation.
A8. Jack Russell Terrier: I'll just pop it in while I'm bouncing off the
walls and furniture.
A9. Old English Sheep Dog: Light bulb? I'm sorry, but I don't see a light
bulb?
A10. Cocker Spaniel: Why change it? I can still pee on the carpet in the
dark.
A11. Chihuahua: Yo quiero Taco Bulb.
A12. Pointer: I see it, there it is, there it is, right there ...
A13. Greyhound: It isn't moving. Who cares?
A14. New Zealand Sheep Dog: First, I'll put all the light bulbs in a
little cluster...
A15. Toy Poodle: I'll just blow in the Border Collie's ear and he'll do
it. By the time he finishes rewiring the house, my nails will be dry.

The Cat's Answer: "Dogs do not change light bulbs. People change light
bulbs. So, the real question is: How long will it be before I can expect
some light, some dinner, and a massage?"

ALL OF WHICH PROVES, ONCE AGAIN, THAT WHILE DOGS HAVE MASTERS, CATS HAVE
STAFF.
 

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