wedding etiquette....an o hell moment~help

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by strollingbones, Jul 15, 2009.

  1. strollingbones
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    strollingbones Diamond Member

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    scenario: friend is getting married....mails out all the invites...invites a married couple she has been friends with for years...she knows the male longer and better than the female of the couple..when shazam....she finds out the couple have recently separated...the male has fallen for another woman...tells the female....serves separation papers...which she is refusing to sign...this all happens in about a two week period.

    female is devastated and feels blind sided, she is digging in and getting bitter...male is living with friends, has new g/f etc. but in the throngs of guilt...wants to settle this quickly...offering a buy out on both house and business... now here is the problem...the wedding invite is to both of them as one couple....but now they are separated....does she mail him one..saying so and so and guest..taking the chance he will bring his new g/f to the wedding?

    so far our discussion has been...his parents will be there....his wife will be there...would he have the balls to roll in with his new g/f? what does one do in this case? its a nightmare for the locals...she is a sweet girl and was totally blindsided...right before their 5th anniversary...now i have told my friend she is only hearing one side of this story...but she is mad that her male friend has not told her anything...i have cautioned her...not to get to pulled into this..and told her that of course he hasnt figured out how to tell his friends that he has been a total dog..but to figure out the wedding invites....

    are they now expected to come as a couple? for appearances? separate with guests? would he have the nerve to roll in with his new bit of fluff? this may prove to be a social mess...as it is a small town...everyone knows what everyone knows...
     
  2. Luissa
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    Luissa Annoying Customer Supporting Member

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    I am sure the guy will bring his girlfriend, they usually do. If I was the jilted wife I would find the best looking available male she knows and go to the wedding. Men hate when you move on also.
     
  3. strollingbones
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    strollingbones Diamond Member

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    see ...my friend doesnt think he will roll in with new g/f....i say new g/f will demand to go...wife is looking good...we are wondering if she should just move on...too...i think wife is still in adjustment phase...but man the bitterness phase will hit soon. hubby will move on from the guilt phase...my advice has been to send him an invite....and if she feels like she has to include the and guest part..then you are taking chances...i say just invite him.
     
  4. Xenophon
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    Xenophon Gone and forgotten

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    Send another invite, their lives ain't your problem.
     
  5. strollingbones
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    strollingbones Diamond Member

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    ahhh but on the new invite....is for him only or him and guest? to me its too soon to get friends involved...this things do work out at times....they are young and think its the worst thing that could ever happen...i say the invite is only for him...dont take any chance of their martial discord spoiling your day
     
  6. Terry
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    Terry Shut the $%$ Up!

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    I would send a single invite to both of them, and I bet at least one of them will not come to the wedding.
     
  7. strollingbones
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    strollingbones Diamond Member

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    wife will come to wedding...his parents are guests....its a mess..socially....that is why i stay out of this crap....you cant make him escort his wife to the wedding...he is moving way too fast..i think the older ones of us....are still in a wait and see mode....give it a bit of tme...but the man wants the settlement fast....why..you cant do anything in nc for a year...she is refusing to sign the separation papers but my dear hubby says that doesnt matter he just has to be out for a year. with witnesses....i say leave it be...dont issue any more invites till she has talked to her friend...the man..right now ...everyone is inclined to side with the sweet little wife...and i question his judgement of having an intown bit of fluff...he should have taken that out of town....not allowing it to touch his family....he aint in love....but he is good and heavy in lust...men..........thfffffffffffffffffffffffffffff
     
  8. Terry
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    Terry Shut the $%$ Up!

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    so one invite has already been sent out, do both know about that one invite already? If so, do nothing else. The couple in question if they both know about the invite will have to figure it out. If only the female knows then I still wouldn't do shit because it's not the couple getting married's problem because invites were sent out already however; I would have someone that will be attending the wedding to monitor if they both show up and be quick to step in to stop and unwanted emotional scenes.
     
  9. Care4all
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    Care4all Warrior Princess Supporting Member

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    Send a single invite to the 2 of them, do NOT take the chance of ruining her own wedding day for the sake of trying to be politically correct if it is politically correct to tell guest they can bring a friend.

    You can damn well know, HE WILL bring the gf if he has the opportunity.
     
  10. strollingbones
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    strollingbones Diamond Member

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    the invite went to the wife's home...which at the time...my friend thought was both of their homes....friend has been friends of the man longer and closer...i would be shocked if he didnt come to the reception and all...someone to intervene...that is a tough one....everyone has a business relationship with the man's dad. o well...life goes on....and its 6 weeks to the wedding...so things could change...
     

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