USMB Christmas gifts...

[Big Fitz]

Those on Santa's naughty list better beware. Since Coal has become so naughty, he's gone green (assuaging the elves... pffft!) and switched to reindeer poop based biofuels.

So you'd be getting reindeer poop this year.

 

[Nosmo King]

Occasionally I encounter little kids at home. I'm a Building Inspector and sometimes I have to inspect occupied housing.

Little kids (two, three, four and five year olds) can get apprehensive when some bearded middle-aged stranger comes into their house. To put them at ease, I joke around with them. This time of year, I tell them I work for Santa Claus! I tell them I help Santa make the "Who's' been Naughty/Nice" list. I ask them three questions.

1) Let's pretend it's supper-time. You look at your plate and there's a big spoonful of lima beans there. Do you eat them all up, or do you play with them with your fork and fake it?

2) Let's pretend it's bedtime. Mom tells you to wash your face, brush your teeth and go to bed! Do you go to bed right away, or do you put up a big fuss and want to stay up late to see what's going on?

3) The most important question: have you ever taken a toy away from another kid just to make them mad?

The parents always get a big kick out of it and the kids giggle and are too cute! They always get a candy cane from me.

 

[Big Black Dog]

BBD - Life time supply of Beggin' Strips.

Bacon!!!!! I'd get it myself but I don't have thumbs....

 

[Big Black Dog]

I've started my Christmas shopping for the USMB members. I haven't finished up yet, so if you don't see your name, don't panic... These are some of the gifts I have purchased so far:

Gunny - toy soldiers.
Xotoxi - Whoopi cushion
Jeremy - Snow cone machine
Pale Rider - Snow shovel
del - Sack of bird seed
Echo Zulu - Chippendale guys calendar
Masquerade - Red BMW sports car
Kat - One of those rubber chickens
California Girl - Roller skates
Strollingbones - Something fun to smoke

Still have more shopping to do.

Thanks for the gift. In this case, it is truly the thought that counts.

BigBlackDog from me:

Thanks. I'm all choked up!

 

[Jeremy]

BBD - Life time supply of Beggin' Strips.

Bacon!!!!! I'd get it myself but I don't have thumbs....

 

[Rat in the Hat]

BBD - Life time supply of Beggin' Strips.

Bacon!!!!! I'd get it myself but I don't have thumbs....

Thanks for the gifts, BBD. Here's an early gift for you.

 

[Big Black Dog]

Been doing a little more Christmas shopping but still not finished up yet...

LilOLady - Lump of coal.
syrenn - $1,000.00 pre-paid Visa debit card.
Nosmo King - Case of cheap red wine.
Sherry - All day spa package.
Granny - Bag of 'Ole Virginia peanuts, all-day pass to Bush Gardens in Williamsburg, Va.
Foxfyre - 2011 Mustang convertable.
SFC Ollie - Two-week paid vacation to Hawaii (thanks for being such a patriot.)
Luissa - Year's supply of Jolly Time popcorn and free movie pass for two for a year.

 

[Nosmo King]

Been doing a little more Christmas shopping but still not finished up yet...

LilOLady - Lump of coal.
syrenn - $1,000.00 pre-paid Visa debit card.
Nosmo King - Case of cheap red wine.
Sherry - All day spa package.
Granny - Bag of 'Ole Virginia peanuts, all-day pass to Bush Gardens in Williamsburg, Va.
Foxfyre - 2011 Mustang convertable.
SFC Ollie - Two-week paid vacation to Hawaii (thanks for being such a patriot.)
Luissa - Year's supply of Jolly Time popcorn and free movie pass for two for a year.

A whole case! Wow!

I read an interview with Margeaux Hemingway who explained her first name was the vintage of wine her parents drank the night she was conceived.

I guess that would make my real first name Night Train.

 

[Jeremy]

For Christophera:

 

[Dr.House]

I've got Cuddy...

No need for presents this year... Spend it on the less fortunate...

 

[Sherry]

Been doing a little more Christmas shopping but still not finished up yet...

LilOLady - Lump of coal.
syrenn - $1,000.00 pre-paid Visa debit card.
Nosmo King - Case of cheap red wine.
Sherry - All day spa package.
Granny - Bag of 'Ole Virginia peanuts, all-day pass to Bush Gardens in Williamsburg, Va.
Foxfyre - 2011 Mustang convertable.
SFC Ollie - Two-week paid vacation to Hawaii (thanks for being such a patriot.)
Luissa - Year's supply of Jolly Time popcorn and free movie pass for two for a year.

You are an excellent gift giver!!

 

[Big Fitz]

I guess that would make my real first name Night Train.

Coulda been worse. Could have been "Mad Dog 20/20". Mmmm Kiwi Strawberry!

I've got Cuddy...

No need for presents this year... Spend it on the less fortunate...

Showoff. Behave.

:::checks stocking::: Dammit, not even a lump o coal yet so I can piss off the environazis.

 

[Big Fitz]

Been doing a little more Christmas shopping but still not finished up yet...

LilOLady - Lump of coal.
syrenn - $1,000.00 pre-paid Visa debit card.
Nosmo King - Case of cheap red wine.
Sherry - All day spa package.
Granny - Bag of 'Ole Virginia peanuts, all-day pass to Bush Gardens in Williamsburg, Va.
Foxfyre - 2011 Mustang convertable.
SFC Ollie - Two-week paid vacation to Hawaii (thanks for being such a patriot.)
Luissa - Year's supply of Jolly Time popcorn and free movie pass for two for a year.

You are an excellent gift giver!!

Sherry, that pick made me think of a quote from Smokey and the Bandit.

Raylene: "Bandit! Look at me!" (as she's trying hard to stop him from getting Snowman out of bed with curlers in her hair)

Bandit: "I find it hard to look at you Raylene. Specially when you have those things in your hair. It makes me think you're listening to a radio station in Savannah."

 

[Big Black Dog]

More Christmas gifts...

Oddball - Book that tells how to make paper airplanes.
elvis - 8 X 10 glossy black and white photo of Michael Jackson.
Huh? - Case of scotch.
Political Chic - magic carpet
mudwhistle - Mr. Spock action figure.
Zoom-boing - pound of catnip and three rescued cats.
Roomy - Case of Old Speckled Hen and subscription to Playboy.
Sarah G - New bathrobe and slippers.
Pixiestix - Snuggie with skulls on it.

Will do some more shopping maybe later today.

 

[Ringel05]

If you can work it into your budget, could you get me a new wheel like this one?

I'm starting to get a little chubby. Thanks.

Jeeze. Get with the times dude.

[ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kfJnqbudMzs"]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kfJnqbudMzs[/ame]

 

[Rat in the Hat]

If you can work it into your budget, could you get me a new wheel like this one?

I'm starting to get a little chubby. Thanks.

Jeeze. Get with the times dude.

[ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kfJnqbudMzs"]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kfJnqbudMzs[/ame]

I don't need a car. Radioman gave me a Death Star!

 

[Nosmo King]

I guess that would make my real first name Night Train.

Coulda been worse. Could have been "Mad Dog 20/20". Mmmm Kiwi Strawberry!

My last name is Boonesfarm.

 

[Si modo]

I guess that would make my real first name Night Train.

Coulda been worse. Could have been "Mad Dog 20/20". Mmmm Kiwi Strawberry!

My last name is Boonesfarm.

Nosmo King: A truckload of LemonBlend mix.

 

[RadiomanATL]

I want an XBox 360....who is getting me one?

 

[Nosmo King]

Coulda been worse. Could have been "Mad Dog 20/20". Mmmm Kiwi Strawberry!

My last name is Boonesfarm.

Nosmo King: A truckload of LemonBlend mix.

From Islay's? Could I get some chip-chop and jumbo with 'at?