Urination will go to committee

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by Stephanie, Nov 23, 2006.

  1. Stephanie
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    Stephanie Diamond Member Supporting Member

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    Wellllllll! I thought I'd about heard it all, but.......:piss2:
    I saw this picture on this subject on another site I belong too......:eek2:
    [​IMG]

    A local decision that schoolboys must sit on toilet seats when urinating has provoked political debate.
    The head of The Democrats Party, a splinter group of former Progress Party hardliners, Vidar Kleppe, is outraged that boys at Dvergsnes School in Kristiansand have to sit and pee.

    Kleppe accuses the school of fiddling with God's work, and wants the matter discussed at the executive committee level of the local council, newspaper Dagbladet reports.

    "When boys are not allowed to pee in the natural way, the way boys have done for generations, it is meddling with God's work," Kleppe told the newspaper.

    "It is a human right not to have to sit down like a girl," Kleppe said.

    Principal Anne Lise Gjul at Dvergsnes School would not comment on Kleppe's plans to make political waves and regretted if anyone was offended by the ban on standing and passing water.

    Gjul told NRK (Norwegian Broadcasting) that the young boys are simply not good enough at aiming, and the point was to have a pleasant toilet that could be used by both boys and girls.
    http://www.aftenposten.no/english/local/article1474158.ece
     
  2. KarlMarx
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    KarlMarx Senior Member

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    Well, if little boys must sit because they aren't good at aiming, perhaps they need to have a government program that helps them!

    The government can set up target ranges where little boys can aim at targets while urinating.

    Perhaps we could boost their self esteem by offering prizes for best shot, longest distance, etc etc.

    We can call them National Pee Ranges, or NPR, for short. Which might not be a bad idea, the government already has one NPR and it's a great way to throw money down a hole, too.

    It might piss off some anti-gun types, though (pun intended).

    Eventually, knowing government, they'll expand it to potty training in general and it will be mandatory to take your kid to them.

    This will then make it difficult for parents, so they'll have to live close by and have a home on the range (another pun intended).
     
  3. Stephanie
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    Stephanie Diamond Member Supporting Member

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    Your on a roll tonight......:rotflmao:


    :thup:
     
  4. red states rule
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    red states rule Senior Member

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    Happy Thanksgiving, You Selfish Bastards!
    Thanksgiving! A time for taking stock of all the things in life one is most thankful for, things we typically take for granted all year long. Your friends. Your family. I'm sure they'd all agree with me when I say that thing we should all be most thankful for is the sacred right to urinate in public.

    Public urination is as much a part of downtown Seattle as sidewalk vomit, yet it’s a vanishing art form even in our proudly Metro-Natural city. There was a time when a visitor to our shores could enjoy a fine caffeinated beverage at one of our many outdoor cafes while being sprayed with urine by a cackling wino. But the times, they are a changin’. Thanks to society's growing obsession with making a profit, appreciation for our vibrant Homeless Community has taken a back seat to the interests of greedy Seattle shopkeepers who naively insist that deranged street people letting loose in their doorways is bad for business. In words that harkened back to the Jim Crow era, they demanded something be done about those “uppity public urinators”.

    For the progressive Seattle City Council, it was a problem for which there were no easy answers. Because of a little thing called “The Bill of Rights”, they couldn’t force homeless people to stop urinating in public any more than they could kick masturbators off the city busses. On the other hand, any ordinances drafted to make the mean capitalists shut their selfish cakeholes would only be shot down by the fascist Supreme Court. So how could we silence the irrational complaints of downtown businesses without doing anything that might encourage homeless people to crawl out of the gutter and get jobs?

    Behold, the Crapatron 2000, a completely self-contained and self-cleaning public urinal designed by our European friends to provide a safe haven for the homeless to do what comes natural. The toilets were expensive, yes. But making homeless people comfortable while protecting their privacy and reinforcing their self-esteem isn’t cheap. If business owners wanted the public urination “problem” to be out of sight and out of mind, they would have to pay for it. So Seattle bought five and placed them in areas around town where the stench of urine and feces overpowered the aroma of rotten fish and patchouli.

    Problem solved, right? Not quite. Conservatives threw a predictable hissy fit.
    Their tiny reptilian brains filled with lies by their hate-radio masters, they claimed that the metallic kiosks would be little more than taxpayer-funded crack houses, and demanded the whole plan be scrapped. As usual, the Right couldn’t be more WRONG. Two years after the first one was installed, the toilets are now so popular that French tourists are using them as vacation homes. That’s good for local businesses who depend on tourist dollars, and even better for the city’s Homeless Community who have gone back to their tradition of crapping in planters. Everybody wins!

    Unfortunately, winter is coming. The public fountains will soon freeze over, and the city’s sidewalk cafes will move their tables indoors. Without anywhere to relieve themselves, homeless people are at a serious risk of crawling out of the gutter and getting jobs.

    The logical solution would be to install more toilets – preferably heated ones with plasma TV's and surround sound. But at $700,000 a year to maintain, the city can barely afford to keep the urinals we already have. Alas, Bush’s tax cuts for the wealthiest one percent of Americans - or any tax cuts for that matter - always come at the expense of our most vulnerable citizens.

    So as you’re celebrating the Thanksgiving Harvest of Shame with your domestic life partner tomorrow, try not to think about that poor homeless person they found frozen to a mailbox with his pants around his ankles just so you could have a few extra pennies in your precious paycheck.

    http://blamebush.typepad.com/blamebush/
     

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