The Olerud/Toyman Darts (Yale)

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by Abishai100, Jan 21, 2018.

  1. Abishai100

    Abishai100 VIP Member

    Sep 22, 2013
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    This is a media-metaphysics parable inspired by L.A. Story.

    Signing off,


    The John Olerud Toronto Blue Jays Upper Deck Rookie-Card was considered to be a modern collectible, and it drew renewed fanfare for the city/people of Toronto (Canada) and its participation in American sports (e.g., Toronto Maple Leafs of the NHL). Olerud (MLB) was a young-sensation, being able to both pitch and bat with equal strength! Olerud wanted to teach at Yale but decided to become a CIA operative for 'Hydra' (a secret underground pro-democracy federalism anarchy peace-group in the United States). Olerud's card was like a 'Trojan Horse' for modern pedestrianism traffic consumerism. People cared about commerce after the World Trade Center heart-break on 9/11.


    Enter: Silver Surfer (a maniacal demonic spirit from the underworld and self-proclaimed 'prophet' of anti-capitalist piracy --- e.g., Napster). Silver Surfer wanted to draw on the newfound energy surrounding Olerud rookie-card sales on eBay and create a social spotlight on the socio-political impact of Napster on modernism civilization! Silver Surfer had a beautiful girlfriend, a Yale Literature professor named Veronica Carthy (who was Irish-Catholic). Veronica wanted Silver Surfer to confront John Olerud as a philosopher, not Satan. Olerud accepted Silver Surfer's 'nifty dare.' This was intrigue indeed...


    OLERUD: I don't endorse terrorism!
    SILVER SURFER: Yet, you 'perform' for your audience like a slave...
    OLERUD: I'm a patriot, not a mad eagle!
    SILVER SURFER: What's wrong with a 'lil' eagle-eye,' eh?
    OLERUD: There's a difference between birds and hawks.
    SILVER SURFER: Are you not a fan of 'capitalism falcons,' Olerud?
    OLERUD: I think Yale teachers would agree that vulturism is the new plague.
    SILVER SURFER: I'm no vulture, you hack!
    OLERUD: Who is more beautiful to you, Wonder Woman or Harley Quinn?
    SILVER SURFER: Evil is always more...sensitive (so, Harley Quinn)!
    OLERUD: You find no 'intrigue' in women of government (e.g., Margaret Thatcher)?
    SILVER SURFER: I'm not a 'federalism poet' like you, Olerud.
    OLERUD: You should make power-point presentations about poverty on Facebook!
    SILVER SURFER: Perhaps we can agree about Wonder Woman (DC Comics).


    Silver Surfer decided to take on a human form and start wielding clear-blue toy water-revolver pistols as personal political propaganda symbols of consumerism apologetics (e.g., Enron, Wall Street, etc.). These 'water-guns' were representative of the Surfer's focus on values-driven marketing and toy-design. He even wondered if such 'commerce revelry' would create newfound fanfare for the insidious and eerie super-villain and member of the Legion of Doom, Toyman (DC Comics). Toyman wielded destructive little toys that looked harmless but were in fact 'tools for terror and terrorism.' Toyman wanted to steal Silver Surfer's girlfriend at Yale. It was that...delusional (regarding democracy subversion meters/limits).


    After Silver Surfer gathered his wits and concluded finally that Toyman was in no way real but simply a hieroglyph-like re-presentation of various macro-sociological modernism fears regarding Orwellian hypnosis to gadgets and devices (and toys!). Olerud realized that he was way out of his league and decided to retire quietly and happily as a terrific commerce-oriented rookie-card (Upper Deck) achievement for the modern era. Olerud was the 'invisible Elvis,' and critics of pluralism were not able to find many holes in the subtle argument that toys were creating strange and interesting contact-experiences between culture and society groups!



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