Stress management

Discussion in 'Humor' started by AtlantaWalter, Feb 24, 2004.

  1. AtlantaWalter
    Offline

    AtlantaWalter Member

    Joined:
    Nov 8, 2003
    Messages:
    479
    Thanks Received:
    3
    Trophy Points:
    16
    Location:
    small cave outside Atlanta
    Ratings:
    +3
    Just in case you are having a rough day, here is a stress management
    technique recommended in all of the latest psychological texts. The
    funny thing is that it really works.



    1. Picture yourself near a quiet, peaceful stream.


    2. Birds are softly chirping in the cool mountain air, a gentle breeze is blowing and you feel the sun's comforting warmth on your body.


    3. No one but you knows your secret place.


    4. You are in total seclusion from the hectic place called "The
    world".


    5. The soothing sound of a gentle waterfall fills the air with a
    cascade of serenity.


    6. The water is crystal clear, cool and soothing.


    7. You can easily make out the face of the person you are holding
    underwater as the last of the air bubbles escape from their mouth!!!!


    8. See... You're smiling already!
    :p:
     
  2. Johnney
    Offline

    Johnney Senior Member

    Joined:
    Dec 9, 2003
    Messages:
    4,330
    Thanks Received:
    141
    Trophy Points:
    48
    Location:
    IOWA
    Ratings:
    +141
    you have no idea how many times a day i have to use this...lol
     
  3. waltky
    Offline

    waltky Wise ol' monkey Supporting Member

    Joined:
    Feb 6, 2011
    Messages:
    23,706
    Thanks Received:
    2,145
    Trophy Points:
    255
    Location:
    Okolona, KY
    Ratings:
    +5,132
    Hmmm, mebbe is why I had a small stroke last week?...
    [​IMG]
    Constant Email, Text, Social Media Checks Lead to Stress
    February 23, 2017 - Nearly 90 percent of Americans say they “constantly or often” check their email, texts and social media accounts leading to increased stress, according to a report from the American Psychological Association (APA).
    See also:

    Study: Cats Not Linked to Mental Illness
    February 22, 2017 - There is some good news for cat lovers. Turns out those reports that people who grew up with cats have a higher risk of mental illness are not true.
     
  4. Abishai100
    Offline

    Abishai100 VIP Member

    Joined:
    Sep 22, 2013
    Messages:
    3,003
    Thanks Received:
    138
    Trophy Points:
    85
    Ratings:
    +290
    The Crazy Dentist

    That was great. I like stories/ideas about offbeat stress-relief, and who doesn't these days? Do you realize how many people stare at computer/smartphone screens for hours and hours everyday? I have to admit I'm one of these modernism zombies.

    I just thought about the unsaid S&M associated with overuse of computers, and how my friends and relatives seem obsessed with Facebook.

    Here's a short-story I wrote about a psycho dentist obsessed with toothaches. The character is obviously inspired by Steve Martin's hilarious character from the horror-comedy film Little Shop of Horrors.

    What do ya think?



    ====

    Oscar was a happy dentist who studied dentistry and had his own practice in Virginia. He never married but was a content man, 30 years-old, with a profitable dentistry practice. One night, Oscar was watching the sado-masochistic iconic American horror film A Nightmare on Elm Street and something in him just snapped. He started thinking about the pure and eerie human guilty pleasure of seeing and imagining violence and eccentricity!

    Oscar decided to go on a personal 'deranged crusade' at his dentistry office. Every now and then, he'd turn to his patients and give them a creepy smile and say, "You know, as a dentist, what fascinates me 'philosophically' is the strange and undeniable pleasure-pain principle of playing with your loose tooth!" His patients understood what he meant and what he was referring to --- how the nagging pain of a loose tooth (sometimes requiring dentistry-work) was for some inexplicable reason impossible to ignore or even play with (even though it was a harmless 'sado-masochistic' behavior).

    Oscar decided to write a series of notes in his private diary regarding this odd stress-relieving behavior of playing with loose teeth. "Maybe it's the hustle and bustle of modern life that draws people these days (perhaps more than ever) to that eerily tempting pleasure-pain feeling of playing with one's loose tooth!" Oscar decided he should win the Nobel Prize of Insanity for his offbeat and very strange 'modernism discovery.' He never hurt his patients though so he continued to believe he was completely...sane.

    ====


    Dollmaker_II.jpg
     

Share This Page