Spotting Canadians

Discussion in 'Canada' started by Doomer, Jul 14, 2004.

  1. Doomer
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    Doomer Member

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    Hi folks. I've enjoyed reading some of the posts on this board.

    I thought I'd introduce myself with this little bit on Canadianisms.

    Try and see how many you get right before looking at the definitions.

    Enjoy.

    As a Canadian, you have to be extra vigilant. There are a lot of impostors out there. If you suspect that someone is falsely trying to pass themselves off as a Canadian, make the following statement - and then carefully note their reaction:

    "Last night, I cashed my pogey and went to buy a mickey of C.C. at the beer parlour, but my skidoo got stuck in the muskeg on my way back to the duplex. I was trying to deke out a deer, you see. Damn chinook, melted everything. And then a mountie snuck up behind me in a ghost car and gave me an impaired. I was S.O.L., sitting there dressed only in my Stanfields and a touque at the time. And the Mountie, he's all chippy and everything, calling me a "sh*t disturber" and what not. What could I say, except, "Sorry, EH!"

    If the person you are talking to nods sympathetically, they're one of us. If, however, they stare at you with a blank comprehension, they are not a real Canadian. Have them reported to the authorities at once.

    The passage cited above contains no fewer than 19 different Canadianisms. In order:

    * pogey: EI (Employment insurance). Money provided by the government for not working.

    * mickey: A small bottle of booze (13 oz) (A Texas mickey, on the other hand, is a ridiculously big bottle of booze, which, despite the name, is still a Canadianism through and through.)

    * C.C.: Canadian Club, a brand of rye. Not to be confused with "hockey stick," another kind of Canadian Club.

    * beer parlour: Like an ice cream parlour, but for Canadians.

    * skidoo: Self-propelled decapitation unit for teenagers, (Snow-Mobiles)

    * muskeg: Boggy swampland.

    * duplex: A single building divided in half with two sets of inhabitants,each trying to pretend the other doesn't exist while at the same time managing to drive each other crazy; metaphor for Canada's French and English.

    * deke: Used as a verb, it means "to fool an opponent through skillful misdirection." As a noun, it is used most often in exclamatory constructions, such as: "Whadda deke!" Meaning, "My, what an impressive display of physical dexterity employing misdirection and guile."

    * chinook: An unseasonably warm wind that comes over the Rockies and onto the plains, melting snow banks in Calgary but just missing Edmonton, much to the pleasure of Calgarians.

    * Mountie: Canadian icon, strong of jaw, red of coat, pure of heart. Always get their man! (See also Pepper spray, uses of.)

    * snuck: To have sneaked; to move, past tense, in a sneaky manner; non-restrictive extended semi-gerundial form of "did sneak." (We think.)

    * ghost car: An unmarked police car, easily identifiable by its inconspicuousness.

    * impaired: A charge of drunk driving. Used both as a noun and as an adjective (the alternative adjectival from of "impaired" being "pissed to the gills").

    * S.O.L.: Sh*t outta luck; in an unfortunate predicament.

    * Stanfields: Men's underwear, especially Grandpa-style, white cotton cones with a big elastic waistband and a large perfluous flap in the front and back!

    * touque: Canada's official National Head Apparel, with about the same suave sex appeal as a pair of Stanfields.

    * chippy: Behaviour that is inappropriately aggressive; constantly looking for a reason to find offense; from "chip on one's shoulder."

    * sh*t disturber: a troublemaker or provocateur. According to Katherine Barber, editor in Chief of the Canadian Oxford Dictionary,"shit disturber" is a distinctly Canadian term.
     
  2. Annie
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    Annie Diamond Member

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    Welcome Doomer! :laugh: :thup: Our problem is more with Canadians trying to pass for American, to 'effect' our elections, but your lexicon is great! Some of my fav posters, Said and Issac are Canadian!
     
  3. Isaac Brock
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    Isaac Brock Active Member

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    Awesome Doomer. Good thread idea. Score another member for the Canucks.

    Booter - When water goes over rubber boots. Not to be confused with a Newfie divorce (Boot'her).

    Stubble-jumper - A person from the Prairies, usually from Saskatchewan.

    By Hook or by Crook - Usually about politicians... meaning whatever it takes. Ie The politician is elected by hook or by crook.

    From Town - From St. John's Newfoundland

    Dyke - What americans call a Levy, a retaining wall for water... not the other thing :D

    Poutine - French friends, gravy and cheese curds. Best fat food every from the french lads and lasses in Quebec.

    Man I'll try to think of more later. Marbles, Said?
     
  4. Annie
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    Annie Diamond Member

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    Hey Issac, no thanks, you were on my favs list, thought you'd be shocked!
     
  5. Said1
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    Said1 VIP Member

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    I say these things everyday, do you can think any now?? I'll give it a try:

    Pick up the pace: Meaning hurry up
    You're full of McGillicuddy (SP?) - Meaning you are a brat (great-grandfather used to say this).
    It's been a splice: Meaning you'v enjoyed someone's company, or time spent with them.
    I'll have a large one: Meaning a quarte or REALLY large beer.
    Homo Milk: Meaning homoginized
    Box of beer: Meaning box containing 6, 12, or 24 beers
    LCBO :D Meaning Liquor Control Board Ontario, or in other words, liquor store
    Barley Sandwich: Having beer instead of a meal
    GST Check: Goods and Services Tax rebate check
    Molson Muscle: Beer gut

    There, not bad eh? ;)
     
  6. Isaac Brock
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    Isaac Brock Active Member

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    Pleasantly! :beer:
     
  7. Said1
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    Said1 VIP Member

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    Some phrases are not as common in certain places. "Ghost Car" is not used in Ontario (that I know of), but that's what everyone called undercover police in Calgary. "Pick up the pace" is something I have only heard here (Ottawa) too. I find the spatial distribution (I finally used that term! Take that Professor. Wallace. :p: ) of slang in per region interesting.
     

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