Situation, what would you do?

RodISHI

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Nov 29, 2008
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Grandson was choked by step-mom. He tried to get her to stay away from him and leave him alone by telling her he was gay. The gal is an alcoholic and very nasty tempered. She got pissed one day and grabbed him by throat, screaming and choking him. He got away from her called mom and mom came and got him. This was about a month and a half ago. The boy's whole neck was black and blue, this gal did a job on him. Mom calls her mom asked what should I do. I said call the cops and file a complaint.

Cops go over to see gal get her side of the story. She tells them "that nasty little gay bastard deserved it." I can't see a teen deserving to be nearly choked to death by some drunken bitch on a tangent. The prosecutor evidently is not pursuing charges against this woman even though she admitted to choking the boy. What would y'all do?

edit; The gal has beat up one of local cops before in one of her drunken rages, the cops wanted her prosecuted.
 
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Lawsuit, the mother should be able to file charges though, as well as the boy. In most states domestic violence is automatic jailtime that I know of.
 
Lawsuit, the mother should be able to file charges though, as well as the boy. In most states domestic violence is automatic jailtime that I know of.
What I am wondering most is why the prosecutor isn't pursuing the charges on this gal.

lawsuit would be of no effect these people have nothing.
 
Lawsuit, the mother should be able to file charges though, as well as the boy. In most states domestic violence is automatic jailtime that I know of.
What I am wondering most is why the prosecutor isn't pursuing the charges on this gal.

lawsuit would be of no effect these people have nothing.

Class Action suit would. But yeah, that does seem wrong, the prosecutor should be pursuing this like all domestic violence. I would not want to live in that area.
 
hold up here...is the father your son? i would be on my son like fucking white on rice....why is the child living with her to begin with?
 
Lawsuit, the mother should be able to file charges though, as well as the boy. In most states domestic violence is automatic jailtime that I know of.
What I am wondering most is why the prosecutor isn't pursuing the charges on this gal.

lawsuit would be of no effect these people have nothing.

Good question. Fist thing is to make an appointment with the DA's office and try to find out why they are not pursuing this. If they refuse to meet with you or won't answer your questions (be polite but firm) then there has to be some sort of judicial oversight board/committee that you could report this to and have it investigated.
 
hold up here...is the father your son? i would be on my son like fucking white on rice....why is the child living with her to begin with?
No, no, son-in-law's new wife. When the boys were small he threw a tv tuner at same grandson knocked out two front teeth. Rod told him what he would do to him if he ever touched either of the boys again...Shit like that cause a ruckus, (claims of rod being violent).
 
Lawsuit, the mother should be able to file charges though, as well as the boy. In most states domestic violence is automatic jailtime that I know of.
What I am wondering most is why the prosecutor isn't pursuing the charges on this gal.

lawsuit would be of no effect these people have nothing.

Good question. Fist thing is to make an appointment with the DA's office and try to find out why they are not pursuing this. If they refuse to meet with you or won't answer your questions (be polite but firm) then there has to be some sort of judicial oversight board/committee that you could report this to and have it investigated.
That is what I am considering. I think the judiciary ethics committee here is a bit worthless but if this the type stuff that goes on it needs to be stopped.
 
who has custody of said child?
Daughter. He was allowed to go to dad's house after being a brat and insisting he had the right to choose. So he was there a few month, choice to go back to daughter's house after the choking bs. Daughter is concerned about the younger teen, this gal filling him full of shit now, she claims it was the older grandson's fault she choked him. Younger teen grand very naive on a whole and sweet kid. Older teen a bit stubborn but also sweet kid on a whole. Daughter caught him in her bedroom getting ready for a bj with gf and youngest nearby. That's where this all started beginning of summer and he moved out.
 
okay stop the kid moving back and forth....set some rules and stick to them....the older one is playing the mom against the day etc...mom needs to put her foot down and tell kid...its not up to him where he lives...he has no fucking rights...she is the parent...then she needs to tell the father...one more encounter of this type and she will go for him only having supervised visits....

then i would make it real clear to the stepmother...lay another hand on my child and fucking hell will rain down on you...
 
okay stop the kid moving back and forth....set some rules and stick to them....the older one is playing the mom against the day etc...mom needs to put her foot down and tell kid...its not up to him where he lives...he has no fucking rights...she is the parent...then she needs to tell the father...one more encounter of this type and she will go for him only having supervised visits....

then i would make it real clear to the stepmother...lay another hand on my child and fucking hell will rain down on you...

no need for discussion with any of them.....sons....father or stepmother...she needs to say what needs to be said...and move on
Basic advice we gave when daughter asked. You are the parent and you decide. No discussion to it. This is the way it is. You set the rules they follow. Tell them when they hit eighteen they can make all their own decisions.
 
First of all, did anyone take pictures of the injury?

Next, the matter should be reported to Children's Protective Services. If any other children are residing in the home of the alleged perp. CPS should be made aware.
Then, as suggested, an appointment should be made with the DDA who decided not to file charges (My guess a police report was filed too late for evidence (photos to be taken) and the DA decided on that basis).
Finally, I would get the child into counseling, and seek funding for the counseling through a Victim-Witness program. If the crime was reported, the child is still able to recieve funds for counseling even though no charges were filled. Once the minor sees a counselor, and reports what happened, the therapist is required by law to report the abuse, and this opens up one more method for investigation.
 
First of all, did anyone take pictures of the injury?

Next, the matter should be reported to Children's Protective Services. If any other children are residing in the home of the alleged perp. CPS should be made aware.
Then, as suggested, an appointment should be made with the DDA who decided not to file charges (My guess a police report was filed too late for evidence (photos to be taken) and the DA decided on that basis).
Finally, I would get the child into counseling, and seek funding for the counseling through a Victim-Witness program. If the crime was reported, the child is still able to recieve funds for counseling even though no charges were filled. Once the minor sees a counselor, and reports what happened, the therapist is required by law to report the abuse, and this opens up one more method for investigation.
Police report, pictures all the the night it happened. No other children in the dad and step-mom's home. I will tell the daughter about the counseling possibilities. Thank you!
 
What I am wondering most is why the prosecutor isn't pursuing the charges on this gal.

lawsuit would be of no effect these people have nothing.

Good question. Fist thing is to make an appointment with the DA's office and try to find out why they are not pursuing this. If they refuse to meet with you or won't answer your questions (be polite but firm) then there has to be some sort of judicial oversight board/committee that you could report this to and have it investigated.
That is what I am considering. I think the judiciary ethics committee here is a bit worthless but if this the type stuff that goes on it needs to be stopped.

State or local? (DA and ethics committee).
 
Good question. Fist thing is to make an appointment with the DA's office and try to find out why they are not pursuing this. If they refuse to meet with you or won't answer your questions (be polite but firm) then there has to be some sort of judicial oversight board/committee that you could report this to and have it investigated.
That is what I am considering. I think the judiciary ethics committee here is a bit worthless but if this the type stuff that goes on it needs to be stopped.

State or local? (DA and ethics committee).
I only know of one state ethics committee for the judiciary and attorneys here. I'll do some searching to see if I can find what else is here. These rural areas and towns do not have much for county attorneys or decent law enforcement on a whole per say. It took the prosecutor here in this county two years to read a report that was mailed to here when the incident happened. I think she threw the first one in the trash as she asked for a second copy two years later. Not sure if it just a lazy thing or if you have to be connected to the local groupies to get any actual justice going here. The prosecutor/county attorney told me here a few weeks ago concerning fraudulent transfer of our house in the county offices here that it is not her job to investigate. F'ing people here, if we had restored to us what was stolen I'd try to move my family out of this shithole state.
 
That is what I am considering. I think the judiciary ethics committee here is a bit worthless but if this the type stuff that goes on it needs to be stopped.

State or local? (DA and ethics committee).
I only know of one state ethics committee for the judiciary and attorneys here. I'll do some searching to see if I can find what else is here. These rural areas and towns do not have much for county attorneys or decent law enforcement on a whole per say. It took the prosecutor here in this county two years to read a report that was mailed to here when the incident happened. I think she threw the first one in the trash as she asked for a second copy two years later. Not sure if it just a lazy thing or if you have to be connected to the local groupies to get any actual justice going here. The prosecutor/county attorney told me here a few weeks ago concerning fraudulent transfer of our house in the county offices here that it is not her job to investigate. F'ing people here, if we had restored to us what was stolen I'd try to move my family out of this shithole state.

Unless you have solid evidence of misconduct, I highly suggest you do not make allegatons of an ethics violation.
A better road is to make an appointment with a shelter, or other non-profit, which provides assistance to victims of domestic violence. Many are funded by VAWA (Violence Against Women Act) dollars, but that does not mean they do not or will not provide assistance in this situation. An easy way to find such a program is to call your member of congress, and ask their staff which programs funded by VAWA are likely to help.
The largest program in our area has staff attorney's who provide free assistance to victims.

PS If you really want to pursue criminal charges, I suggest the following. Speak with the elected DA first (or his/her #1 if s/he is not available). If you are still not satisfied, tell him/her of your concern and that you will pursue the matter on the state level. Keep a record of this and all contacts (DA, police, etc.) and send this record, the police report, and a short (one page, no more) letter to the Attorney General of your state.
You may want to CC the local media (but do not send the police report or provide the name of the alleged abuser or the minor to anyone but the AG).
 
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