Relationship Discussions Thread

Discussion in 'Health and Lifestyle' started by Joz, Apr 7, 2005.

  1. Joz
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    Joz Senior Member

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    I decided to start this thread because this seems to be a subject that keeps getting discussed throughout the board. I also have been PM'd about my "sex on demand" theory. I think you'd be hard-pressed to find that in anything I've ever posted. With that being said,

    I still hold true to the fact that men need sex for their well being, both mentally & physically. It is the mature man that realizes it's emotional for him also; that's it's better with someone loved.
    Women need the emotional bond before having sex. She needs to feel understood, appreciated, cared for, in order to express herself in this manner. But women need it physically as well.

    Sex is an integral part of a relationship. Without it you cannot have a healthy, happy union. Something is amiss if you donot want to share this,(on a regular basis) with your mate.
    Women withhold sex because a man won't help; or as a punishment. Men won't help because the woman nags or complains. The cycle has to be broken, someone has to make the first move, or nothing will ever change. But each of us feel that if we "give in", we lose power.

    There are reasons why someone doesn't want to have sex; hormones, childhood abuse, things that need professional help. But you will seek help if you truly love your mate, because you want them to be happy.
    Illness, stress, moods, kids, all affect libido. But if one is in need, effort should be made by the partner to help. That doesn't always mean intercourse. There is oral & manual stimulation that can have the same pleasing results. I donot believe a woman must drop her drawers the minute a man walks in the door. But I do believe an effort should be made by both partners to co-operate.
    Should you have sex if you don't feel like it? I don't know. Have I ever? I was married for 21 years.....need I say more? But, I also changed sheets in the middle of the night because a child vomited on them, pushed a car in the ice & snow, sopped up water off the bathroom floor because the toilet overflowed---none of which I wanted to do.

    In the beginning of a relationship sex is exciting. In fact, the whole relationship is. You want to touch the person, talk with them, plan with them. After awhile the excitement wanes. But in it's place is a deep, heartfelt, committed love; both emotionally & physically, that words cannot express. I wish you each that love.
     
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  2. NATO AIR
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    NATO AIR Senior Member

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    :clap1: Excellent.

    (and your sig (which I just noticed) is quite true. That is something I have just now begun to understand and have a long way to go before comprehending fully)
     
  3. dilloduck
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    dilloduck Diamond Member

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    with all due respect Joz , I think you give sex too much priority in the myriad of things involved in relationships. I would much rather have a relationship based on friendship and sharing .
     
  4. dmp
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    dmp Senior Member

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    She's not 'basing' a relationship on sex...she's saying something like:

    "the only difference between a lover and a friend is 'passion'. If couples don't have passion, they may as well simply be roommates."

    Sex and or intimacy is vital to a marriage relationship.
     
  5. dilloduck
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    dilloduck Diamond Member

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    just throwing in my 2 cents ---intimacy doesn't require anything physical to occur
     
  6. dmp
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    dmp Senior Member

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    Indeed. :D Sex with somebody you are passionate about - that's the key.
     
  7. dilloduck
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    dilloduck Diamond Member

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    I would think to feel passion one might want to talk with the other at least.
     
  8. dmp
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    dmp Senior Member

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    I've felt passion with a woman...and neither of us have said a word. Where there exists a certian 'chemestry' (sorry for the cliche) between a man and a woman, that chemistry, or connection can transcent language. It's not that she and I weren't communicating. We were very much in touch with eachother in that moment. Things around us blurred, and for a time, we sat there, our gaze locked upon one another. Our only touch was our hands held; fingers tangled and gently rubbing. For that instance...we knew. This was 'the soul mate' we'd longed for our entire lives.

    At that point, mere 'talking' would have been pointless.
     
  9. no1tovote4
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    no1tovote4 VIP Member

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    I think that it is equally important for them to be passionate about myself as well. It is the mutual passion that makes it an experience to remember.
     
  10. Mr. P
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    Mr. P Senior Member

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    If that's "All" there is to it, that key you speak of fits the jail door, I think they call that rape. :rotflmao:

    PS...I do know what ya mean.
     

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