Blagger
Rookie
- Banned
- #1
Come on, out with!
Tell us all something really mean you've done and maybe gotten away with.
I'll kick things off.
When I was a teenage swagger, me and some friends had a barbeque on a campsite in France. I was pretty drunk by the end of the afternoon. But instead of safely disposing of any of the harmful embers, I tipped the lot into a sandpit, and scooped a thin layer of sand over them to hide the red-hot hazard.
I'm fairly sure no-one (children) trod on the unintentional trap. But if they did, they would've been French. So it wouldn't have mattered.
I wasn't the perpetrator on this occasion, but I was an unintentional accessory all the same.
When I was younger my parents took us on a camping holiday in Italy. After our first day a young Italian family arrived on the pitch opposite us. They were very friendly but their daughter had a much loved doll that when shook would broadcast a very irritating jingle.
She would spend her entire day running about and shaking this doll, triggering its notorious melody. My father was particularly irritated by this constant, unbroken routine. So much so, that on our fourth night into our holiday my brothers and I were awoken by the hissed profanity of a man gripped in a frenzy of destruction. On peering out from under the tent flap we witnessed my father quietly murdering this doll by repeatedly smashing it against the cars towbar. When asked what he was doing, he paused in momentary surprise, only to sternly demand that we went back to bed. We returned to our sleeping bags while listening to the crunch of gravel as the lifeless corpse was tossed onto the road/track to make it look as though the doll had been the unfortunate victim of a hit and run.
We were awoken the following morning by the grieving wails of a heartbroken toddler.
Needless to say, we noticed our daily allowance of spending money sharply increase as our father returned contented to a peaceful holiday without betraying any visible remorse for his actions.
Over to you.
Tell us all something really mean you've done and maybe gotten away with.
I'll kick things off.
When I was a teenage swagger, me and some friends had a barbeque on a campsite in France. I was pretty drunk by the end of the afternoon. But instead of safely disposing of any of the harmful embers, I tipped the lot into a sandpit, and scooped a thin layer of sand over them to hide the red-hot hazard.
I'm fairly sure no-one (children) trod on the unintentional trap. But if they did, they would've been French. So it wouldn't have mattered.
I wasn't the perpetrator on this occasion, but I was an unintentional accessory all the same.
When I was younger my parents took us on a camping holiday in Italy. After our first day a young Italian family arrived on the pitch opposite us. They were very friendly but their daughter had a much loved doll that when shook would broadcast a very irritating jingle.
She would spend her entire day running about and shaking this doll, triggering its notorious melody. My father was particularly irritated by this constant, unbroken routine. So much so, that on our fourth night into our holiday my brothers and I were awoken by the hissed profanity of a man gripped in a frenzy of destruction. On peering out from under the tent flap we witnessed my father quietly murdering this doll by repeatedly smashing it against the cars towbar. When asked what he was doing, he paused in momentary surprise, only to sternly demand that we went back to bed. We returned to our sleeping bags while listening to the crunch of gravel as the lifeless corpse was tossed onto the road/track to make it look as though the doll had been the unfortunate victim of a hit and run.
We were awoken the following morning by the grieving wails of a heartbroken toddler.
Needless to say, we noticed our daily allowance of spending money sharply increase as our father returned contented to a peaceful holiday without betraying any visible remorse for his actions.
Over to you.
