Let me add this: God has allowed the death of innocent people since time immemorial. Why? Random meaning chance, maybe? Because, either there isnt supreme being, or he/she it is a totally cold and emotionless prick, or there isnt a God, to begin with. Either way, what difference does it make? Why worship a God like that? Why? You cant prove the son of a bitch exists, so why bother playing these games ? Just live, and do the best you can, and live with your conscience. That is the best ANYONE can do.
It would seem that if you live to do the best you can, and You both Recognize and Live with Your Conscience, that You are doing better than you think. I take my rage and target Evil and Injustice. Maybe that is how God feels about Free Will, yet Free Will was probably what we demanded. We did not well anticipate consequence or cause and effect. In fact We seem to be lousy at that. The more numbers involved, the more screwed up. How about remaining at peace with your conscience, cutting down on the digs, let your conscience and actions speak for themselves. Find some alone time and heal.
I don't let others Define, draw or paint God for Me. Too many, Limits, Controls, false boundaries. Am I angry at God or angry at a limited perspective, that may not balance? Don't play games. Live for Solution or Resolution. I ask Are we satisfied Yet? Do we have enough? Dis We get enough? Our Reason For Being May outweigh our defiance? That is a Question for Conscience.