- Sep 22, 2013
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Here's a terrorism-optimism tale to commemorate 4th of July!
Maybe TrumpUSA is not so bad...
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Black Mask's nefarious homegrown gang of terrorists planned to attack Yankees Stadium in New York during their 4th of July game against the visiting Toronto Blue Jays. Black Mask was sure a member of the Trump Administration would attend the game and wanted to make their presence known with this clear anti-American terrorist act. President Trump was completely unprepared and even planned to possibly attend the game with First Lady Melania Trump and deliver the traditional presidential first-pitch before the beginning of the game!
Black Mask had visited Egypt and recruited some ex-Taliban members hiding there to help him find black-market munitions in Moscow (where Russian mafia were hiding rogue-IRA members). Black Mask's hope was to obtain some rather impressive explosives (perhaps even nuclear) to set off during the Yankees game on Independence Day. Black Mask even sent an anonymous notice to the NY Post: "I'm so jaded by the release of the patriotism-film Independence Day: Resurgence at a time when consumerism-gluttonies are clouding political sincerity!"
Black Mask's girlfriend Terra tried to dissuade her insidious boyfriend from going through with the terrible terrorism-deed, suggesting that Americans are trying to get their act together, but Black Mask was stubborn. Terra decided to call her friend Duke (a former Navy SEAL) who was hiding out in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania after a complicated infiltration mission in Syria. Terra told Duke about Black Mask's 4th of July plan, and Duke came up with a quick plan. As President Trump was about to throw the first-pitch during the Yankees-Blue Jays, Duke came descending on a parachute from the sky (from his hang-glider) with a megaphone. When Duke delivered his 'surreal message,' Black Mask decided to retreat (and called off the bombing-plan!).
"Mr. President! My name is Duke and I'm a former Navy SEAL. I'm descending on this game between the Yankees and Blue Jays, since Americans need to know that festivities and social rituals on Independence Day (such as a symbolic baseball game!) reflect a pedestrian investment in carrying out 'normal' activities on American soil at a time when anti-American global terrorism (reaching American shores!) has jaded everyone's sense of optimism regarding 'citizenry-vigilantism'!"
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Maybe TrumpUSA is not so bad...
====
Black Mask's nefarious homegrown gang of terrorists planned to attack Yankees Stadium in New York during their 4th of July game against the visiting Toronto Blue Jays. Black Mask was sure a member of the Trump Administration would attend the game and wanted to make their presence known with this clear anti-American terrorist act. President Trump was completely unprepared and even planned to possibly attend the game with First Lady Melania Trump and deliver the traditional presidential first-pitch before the beginning of the game!
Black Mask had visited Egypt and recruited some ex-Taliban members hiding there to help him find black-market munitions in Moscow (where Russian mafia were hiding rogue-IRA members). Black Mask's hope was to obtain some rather impressive explosives (perhaps even nuclear) to set off during the Yankees game on Independence Day. Black Mask even sent an anonymous notice to the NY Post: "I'm so jaded by the release of the patriotism-film Independence Day: Resurgence at a time when consumerism-gluttonies are clouding political sincerity!"
Black Mask's girlfriend Terra tried to dissuade her insidious boyfriend from going through with the terrible terrorism-deed, suggesting that Americans are trying to get their act together, but Black Mask was stubborn. Terra decided to call her friend Duke (a former Navy SEAL) who was hiding out in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania after a complicated infiltration mission in Syria. Terra told Duke about Black Mask's 4th of July plan, and Duke came up with a quick plan. As President Trump was about to throw the first-pitch during the Yankees-Blue Jays, Duke came descending on a parachute from the sky (from his hang-glider) with a megaphone. When Duke delivered his 'surreal message,' Black Mask decided to retreat (and called off the bombing-plan!).
"Mr. President! My name is Duke and I'm a former Navy SEAL. I'm descending on this game between the Yankees and Blue Jays, since Americans need to know that festivities and social rituals on Independence Day (such as a symbolic baseball game!) reflect a pedestrian investment in carrying out 'normal' activities on American soil at a time when anti-American global terrorism (reaching American shores!) has jaded everyone's sense of optimism regarding 'citizenry-vigilantism'!"
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