no real title...i'm just a bit upset...long...

[fuzzykitten99]

Nathan is almost 2 1/2. He says some words, but not many. He talks, but not coherently. It is like listening to someone from another country. Even some of the words he used to say, he doesn't anymore, and we have no idea why.

We brought him in today, and dr said we have every right to be concerned because he is below average with words he knows how to say. Dr. checked his ears, and saw one had infection, which baffled me & Tim because Nathan did not have any of his usual symptoms of fever and inability to sleep more than 2-3 hours at a time.

But dr still wants to get his hearing checked. Tim and I are torn with Nathan possibly having a hearing problem, because he follows simple directions, some even a little more than simple. He knows what things are, because I will ask or say stuff like, "where's the bird?", "go get your shoes", "where's your eyes/nose/mouth/ears?" and he understands completely and gets it right every time. I don't have to talk very loud at all. Sometimes it takes a few tries (2-3) to get his attention when he's playing and I say his name, but I figure its because he's only 2.

He got a puzzle for Christmas, which has pictures of animals on both the pieces and the spaces they fit into, and the child is supposed to match the pictures up and how the shapes fit into the spaces. I had forgotten about the puzzle, so he had never seen it before. I sat with him, and hardly had to show him where the pieces went, and he basically figured it out nearly on his own in about 20 minutes. I did help him a little at first with how the pieces fit in because they were irregular.

I even ask him to repeat words, even just colors and animals, simple stuff. It's almost like he doesn't want to say it. Dr. said he may hear, but not very well, so what he is saying(or trying to), is what he hears from those around him. I am just praying that this IS the problem, and not something else.

I basically feel at a loss because if it isn't his hearing, what if he's learning disabled? Not that I would love him any less, it just makes me feel sad to think that my baby boy won't have a normal school life or a normal life period.

I have been in tears half the night, because of this. I am scared for him. I have always just thought that since he is very active, that makes up for his verbal skills, because he was walking at about 10.5 months. He is always figuring stuff out (without help), like pushing a chair to the counter to get to stuff he wants. He loves to look at things closely, even take them apart if he can.

We read to him though he only sits through 2-3 pages at a time. He has the leap frog touch pad, and we play that with the shapes/colors. He does ok with it, though I think he's more interested in the musical sounds than what the voice is asking him to do because he doesn't seem to know what it is asking.

I almost feel like he's half to almost a year behind where he should be in some things. I haven't even bothered to start potty training yet because he can't even tell me in words (he whines and points) that he wants juice or a banana or whatever. He doesn't turn 3 until august, so I know I have plenty of time for potty training. Plus with the new baby coming, there will be too many changes going on for him to fully accept this new concept. When he whines and points to what he wants, I try to make him say what the item is, but he seems to get more upset and frustrated, and it pains me to see him that way.

I am just scared because I don't know what is the matter with my baby boy. Whatever it is, I can deal with it and accept it when it comes. The hearing test won't be for a few weeks because dr. wants the ear infection to clear up first and then heal, as he saw some pus in there. This is gonna be such torture.

Anyway, if you got this far, thanks for reading. I just needed to get this off my chest.

 

[Semper Fi]

I'm no doctor, nor do I wish to be one, but I may be able to help in some spects. I had massive ear infections when I was a lot younger. Come to think of it I had a lot of medical problems, thankfully none of them too severe. If it is about the same thing I had, he'll grow out of it. It's good that you went to a doctor, that'll speed things right along.

Anyone can easily understand your concern, and that your so concerned you should be proud. Believe me, not many parents are that good. Things like this have a way of working out, though it may not feel that way now.

I definately think you're doing the right thing here, and I'm sure you'll continue to be a good parent. Oh boy, just wait till Nathans in high school!

 

[manu1959]

read every word then read them to my wife (x-emt)...our son is 7 daughter 3. sounds very familiar.

my wife then said:

get a hearing test....find a speech patholigist...get a referal from your school or doctor.....if he is following directions he can hear...if he forgets words he is a boy .... not to be flip but he is a boy....

my wife takes no prisoners...stay in touch

my son is behind, has a tough time with everything....very verbal, loves talking with adults, took years to potty train, builds things, super creative.....i finally decided that i didn't want a different child i wanted the one god gave me...the special one that was different than all the others

 

[Said1]

Nathan is almost 2 1/2. He says some words, but not many. He talks, but not coherently. It is like listening to someone from another country. Even some of the words he used to say, he doesn't anymore, and we have no idea why.

We brought him in today, and dr said we have every right to be concerned because he is below average with words he knows how to say. Dr. checked his ears, and saw one had infection, which baffled me & Tim because Nathan did not have any of his usual symptoms of fever and inability to sleep more than 2-3 hours at a time.

But dr still wants to get his hearing checked. Tim and I are torn with Nathan possibly having a hearing problem, because he follows simple directions, some even a little more than simple. He knows what things are, because I will ask or say stuff like, "where's the bird?", "go get your shoes", "where's your eyes/nose/mouth/ears?" and he understands completely and gets it right every time. I don't have to talk very loud at all. Sometimes it takes a few tries (2-3) to get his attention when he's playing and I say his name, but I figure its because he's only 2.

He got a puzzle for Christmas, which has pictures of animals on both the pieces and the spaces they fit into, and the child is supposed to match the pictures up and how the shapes fit into the spaces. I had forgotten about the puzzle, so he had never seen it before. I sat with him, and hardly had to show him where the pieces went, and he basically figured it out nearly on his own in about 20 minutes. I did help him a little at first with how the pieces fit in because they were irregular.

I even ask him to repeat words, even just colors and animals, simple stuff. It's almost like he doesn't want to say it. Dr. said he may hear, but not very well, so what he is saying(or trying to), is what he hears from those around him. I am just praying that this IS the problem, and not something else.

I basically feel at a loss because if it isn't his hearing, what if he's learning disabled? Not that I would love him any less, it just makes me feel sad to think that my baby boy won't have a normal school life or a normal life period.

I have been in tears half the night, because of this. I am scared for him. I have always just thought that since he is very active, that makes up for his verbal skills, because he was walking at about 10.5 months. He is always figuring stuff out (without help), like pushing a chair to the counter to get to stuff he wants. He loves to look at things closely, even take them apart if he can.

We read to him though he only sits through 2-3 pages at a time. He has the leap frog touch pad, and we play that with the shapes/colors. He does ok with it, though I think he's more interested in the musical sounds than what the voice is asking him to do because he doesn't seem to know what it is asking.

I almost feel like he's half to almost a year behind where he should be in some things. I haven't even bothered to start potty training yet because he can't even tell me in words (he whines and points) that he wants juice or a banana or whatever. He doesn't turn 3 until august, so I know I have plenty of time for potty training. Plus with the new baby coming, there will be too many changes going on for him to fully accept this new concept. When he whines and points to what he wants, I try to make him say what the item is, but he seems to get more upset and frustrated, and it pains me to see him that way.

I am just scared because I don't know what is the matter with my baby boy. Whatever it is, I can deal with it and accept it when it comes. The hearing test won't be for a few weeks because dr. wants the ear infection to clear up first and then heal, as he saw some pus in there. This is gonna be such torture.

Anyway, if you got this far, thanks for reading. I just needed to get this off my chest.

First off, clam down. I know EXACTLY what you're going through, I had the same problems with my daughter. She started showing signs of hearing loss at 9 months and didn't start talking until she was almost three. And by that I mean, the EMT would clear her ears out, she would learn new words, but her ears would slowly fill with fluid (it's was an adenoid problem with her) become infected and then I'd be back to square one with the EMT all the while any new speach improvement would be lost as her hearing decreased each time.

Take Manu's advice, take NO PRISONERS. My daughter's physician recommend removing adenoids, the first EMT disagreed saying the problem would clear up on it's own when she was about 4-5 yrs. In the mean time, I had a child who couldn't communicate most of the time, was very hyper-active and couldn't hear me call out to her if she was in danger and had 4-5 other kids in my care. I stuck with the same EMT for about a yr, until I finally exploded in his office and demanded a referal to another EMT - he obliged.

I had to start over with the new EMT, because they like to establish a patter, like I mentioned above (try to pay attention to your son's symptoms prior to any hearing loss or infections). but it was worth it because he pin-pointed the underlying causes (almost chronic upper respitory congestion and infection) and made some recommendations as to how to treat them in order to prevent fluid/ear wax build up, infection and ultimately hearing loss. He also perscribed a nasal spray to help move things along her nasal passages instead of removing her adenoids and have had no problems since!!

She had some speach therapy, but you might be interested to know that a lot of it can be done by you, very easily at home, in the car or outside at the park although I would recommend finding a pathologist as soon as possible because they can help calm your fears and give you some good coping advice. You can also find some great tools and information on the internet.

In the end, the only residual problems my daughter had related to speach and language was reading. I was lucky again, and her teacher caught it right away last year, now she helps other kids with reading in her class!

As long as you stay on your doctors ass, keep track of his symptoms and stay calm, all should hopefully be well. I had to keep reminding myself that it could be worse and I'm lucky she's healthy and happy, despite all that's happening!

Good luck and again, KICK ASS!

 

[Said1]

I also had similar problems, although not nearly as severe as a child. The EMT treating me removed my adenoids and tonsils when I was not quite 3. It can be hereditary in some cases.

 

[rtwngAvngr]

Kids develop differently. Professionals put together guidelines that are only AVERAGES of when kids should start doing different things etc. Just remember that Thomas Edison was basically kicked out of school in the 5th grade because his teachers thought he was ineducably retarded. I haven't had a kid and can't empathize fully, but it's just never over till the fat lady sings.

 

[Said1]

Kids develop differently. Professionals put together guidelines that are only AVERAGES of when kids should start doing different things etc. Just remember that Thomas Edison was basically kicked out of school in the 5th grade because his teachers thought he was ineducably retarded. I haven't had a kid and can't empathize fully, but it's just never over till the fat lady sings.

That's why finding a pathologist is so important, along with throwing out those stupid development books the OB gives you. An old lady told me to burn that book, I guess old people are right sometimes, eh Arch?

 

[Fmr jarhead]

Take care of anything physical that you can, keep an emotional balance, and love him....that is all any parent can do for thier child....That is slow, advanced, normal, physically able or physically impaired.....

Jake is 2 1/2 now, as well, and is suffering all the signs of boyhood that one would expect....bumps, bruises, hard headed, selective hearing, humor, etc....

I wish you well, and your son, of course.....there are some great DRs in the TC's that can be a great help (and if it gets to be a big enough concern, try one of the Mayo Clinics.....

 

[fuzzykitten99]

Thanks everyone. I feel a bit better this morning. I am trying to really listen when he talks to me, and some stuff is a little clearer. He does talk like you are in deep conversation, but everything sounds mushed together. Though there are a few things that I hear, as well as Tim, that are very clear.

Even just this morning, he was playing with the puzzle I mentioned. There is one piece that is somewhat difficult because of the colors and the shape. Tim and I were playing with him with it, and he was putting the piece in, and it was upside down. He handed the piece to Tim, and said clear as day "Dat's too hard". I know he had to have actually said that, because Tim looked at me, and said "Did he just say 'that's too hard'?". He had heard it too. then I pointed to the dog picture, and asked what it was, and it did sound like he said "dat's a dog", but maybe I was just thinking I heard it, ya know, wishful thinking.

I know that he has said on more than one occasion, though it may be a phonetic coincidence, "What the Hell?" which of course he shouldn't say, but whatever.

I love him so much, and I feel like there's something that I did or did not do that caused this. I feel like I should have read to him more when he was younger. He used to sit still and have me read the same book 10 times, which was fine with me. But then he got older, and discovered all the noisy button toys, and his all-time favorite, can't-leave-the-house-without-one, matchbox cars. He says 'car' more than any other word he knows. He is fascinated with cars, airplanes, trains, anything that moves and is not a living being. When an airplane flys overhead, we have to stop and look, he points, and it sounds like he's trying to say airplane, but I am not sure.

 

[Fmr jarhead]

He sounds pretty normal to me.....Jake has some difficulty with words, too...and is always talking....I don't understand a lot of it, but he is just learning to communicate. Keep in mind, boys are typically a little slower to develop than girls with vocabulary and communication....

Just keep an eye on the physical "problems," earaches and fluid are not a good thing (even for adults...)

 

[fuzzykitten99]

He sounds pretty normal to me.....Jake has some difficulty with words, too...and is always talking....I don't understand a lot of it, but he is just learning to communicate. Keep in mind, boys are typically a little slower to develop than girls with vocabulary and communication....

Just keep an eye on the physical "problems," earaches and fluid are not a good thing (even for adults...)

well, if he has an ear infection NOW, yet never showed the usual signs, I am wondering if he has had more without us knowing...

Dr. looked in his ears yesterday, and said he definitely has something going on with his right ear, as there was a bit of pus inside. This was odd to us because he usually gets a low-grade fever and doesn't sleep well at night.

Tim had many ear infections when he was younger, and since not all of them hurt, he has so much scar tissue that he is 80% deaf in his left ear. Same with his mom. So after the hearing test, we are going to push for getting tubes in.

I am wondering if maybe its just one ear, rather than both, that might be hindering his speech.

 

[Trigg]

My oldest boy didn't start talking until he was almost 3 yrs. He had ear infections and we finally put tubes in both ears. After that his speech improved. His Dr. at the time explained that its was like trying to hear with cotton stuffed in his ears. He was a different child after the tubes were put in.

In fact all 3 of my boys were speech delayed, two of them had speech therapy to help them catch up.

My oldest is now in 7th grade with no lasting affects of his late speech problems. My other boys are now completely caught up also. It took about a year of therapy for both of them

You've caught this at a young age and the younger they are the more speech therapy will them them.

 

[Said1]

After that his speech improved. His Dr. at the time explained that its was like trying to hear with cotton stuffed in his ears. .

Some of the pronunciations they came out with were probably quite humorous in retrospect. My daughter used to say "markeko" for marshmello.

 

[Trigg]

Some of the pronunciations they came out with were probably quite humorous in retrospect. My daughter used to say "markeko" for marshmello.

My 3 year old is still leaving off all his L's (which the therapist said is normal for his age).

He was asking to watch a "bues cues" video, that one took me a minute Blues Clues.

When my 8 year old was little he confused his B's and F's. My grandad's nickname is Buck, needless to say we didn't want him saying it.

 

[Annie]

Having read through this and formulating a response to several posts, I'm moving to the new 'education' thread. There's lots here for parents and teachers.

 

[Said1]

My 3 year old is still leaving off all his L's (which the therapist said is normal for his age).

He was asking to watch a "bues cues" video, that one took me a minute Blues Clues.

When my 8 year old was little he confused his B's and F's. My grandad's nickname is Buck, needless to say we didn't want him saying it.

Poor Granpa.


The L's and R's along with a few other combos took awhile for my daughter too. The biggest problem we had was getting her to slow down while she was talking. For the longest time everything came out so slurred even though she could say most letters and combinations properly. So much of it works itself out over time, not unlike children without speach delays. Parents are
so anal - not me of course.

One thing that's nice about having older children is that they can tell you if they don't think they're hearing properly......so they can go to the doctor right away, as opposed to going to school.

 

[fuzzykitten99]

My oldest boy didn't start talking until he was almost 3 yrs. He had ear infections and we finally put tubes in both ears. After that his speech improved. His Dr. at the time explained that its was like trying to hear with cotton stuffed in his ears. He was a different child after the tubes were put in.

In fact all 3 of my boys were speech delayed, two of them had speech therapy to help them catch up.

My oldest is now in 7th grade with no lasting affects of his late speech problems. My other boys are now completely caught up also. It took about a year of therapy for both of them

You've caught this at a young age and the younger they are the more speech therapy will them them.

Thanks. REading this makes me feel better about everything. I think I was more upset that I heard what I didn't want to hear. It doesn't help that my hormones are rollercoastering as we speak.

I keep thinking it may have to do with how many times he has bumped his forehead on stuff. And not just the little ones (nearly 2x a week on stuff), ones like metal poles, falling off our bed onto our hardwood floor in the bedroom (just last night), tripping and hitting concrete, though I think that one may have been cushioned by grass clippings. That one, and the metal pole, were in the same spot within 2 days of each other, but neither produced a large bump, or even bruise, which makes me think he didn't hit as hard as I thought...but I still worry even though he seems fine after a few minutes, and returns to playing.

Then there's the intentional hitting his head on walls and stuff when he was a bit younger. He did this when he was mad.

 

[Nienna]

My son (4) smacks himself on the head when he gets mad. He has a firecracker temper.

My nephew (9) used to rock himself as a child. He still does weird things like that. I think he does have some sort of attention deficit disorder. Or he may be slightly autistic. Or he may be a VERY kinesthetic learner. He did things compulsively, like mess up a room, etc. I think the kid is a genious. Seriously. He could read cursive in kindergarten, and was doing square roots in first grade. If he wasn't so smart, I think he would have serious problems in school, although; he does have behavioral issues.

My niece (3) was born with an unformed ear. She only has nerve hearing in the one ear. She has some of the problems you were talking about with your son. She leaves off the beginnings sounds of many words, and doesn't enunciate well. She has problems with balance, and is rather clumsy. But her understanding was fine, and she can also follow directions, etc. My sister was lucky enough to get her into a speech therapy program. She is improving in her speech. We all try to enunciate very well around her. She is above her age level in knowing her alphabet/colors/shapes/etc.

My point is, even with "problems," kids can live very active and normal lives. Some of the things we do to help them compensate become such second nature that it really is no big deal. And one thing I can say for the lib's out there, society in general seems more accepting of people with "problems" than it used to. My older girl is a little chubby, but she has NEVER been made fun of. There is such an emphasis on "differences" that kids are not excluded as they used to be. At least it seems that way to me. (Disclaimer: I am not endorsing the extreme liberal view of multiculturalism and inclusion)

We were all upset when we saw Lissie's ear after she was born. But now it is just who she is, and her life really isn't all that different. I know it's hard when you first find out your kid might be a little different. But, it really does become "no big deal" in the long run. Hang in there.

 

[Abbey Normal]

Kiteen, I have a nephew who had almost constant ear infections as an infant/toddler. He didn't speak with any coherence until he was 4 (nor was he potty trained until 4). Even after that, he mumbled a lot, and was hard to understand for a few years. He is now 13, and truly excels in both school work and as a drummer.

I remember reading once that ear infections can set little ones back, but it usually all evens out in the end. Sorry I don't have the source for that, but I do remember reading it.

 

[liberalogic]

Thanks everyone. I feel a bit better this morning. I am trying to really listen when he talks to me, and some stuff is a little clearer. He does talk like you are in deep conversation, but everything sounds mushed together. Though there are a few things that I hear, as well as Tim, that are very clear.

Even just this morning, he was playing with the puzzle I mentioned. There is one piece that is somewhat difficult because of the colors and the shape. Tim and I were playing with him with it, and he was putting the piece in, and it was upside down. He handed the piece to Tim, and said clear as day "Dat's too hard". I know he had to have actually said that, because Tim looked at me, and said "Did he just say 'that's too hard'?". He had heard it too. then I pointed to the dog picture, and asked what it was, and it did sound like he said "dat's a dog", but maybe I was just thinking I heard it, ya know, wishful thinking.

I know that he has said on more than one occasion, though it may be a phonetic coincidence, "What the Hell?" which of course he shouldn't say, but whatever.

I love him so much, and I feel like there's something that I did or did not do that caused this. I feel like I should have read to him more when he was younger. He used to sit still and have me read the same book 10 times, which was fine with me. But then he got older, and discovered all the noisy button toys, and his all-time favorite, can't-leave-the-house-without-one, matchbox cars. He says 'car' more than any other word he knows. He is fascinated with cars, airplanes, trains, anything that moves and is not a living being. When an airplane flys overhead, we have to stop and look, he points, and it sounds like he's trying to say airplane, but I am not sure.

I really hope that everything turns out okay with your son. I worked with young children (3-7) for two years and many different children develop skills at different times. That doesn't mean, though, that you shouldn't investigate every avenue right now, which I assume you will do because you sound like such a devoted, caring, and loving mother. I grew up with an autistic brother who had very little speech and was high functioning (he made odd sounds, motions, etc.). It's a really tough thing to deal with it, but that doesn't mean that anyone should give up. I'm not trying to scare you and say that there's anything wrong with your son (I hope and doubt that there is), but the earlier you discover the problem (whether it be hearing, mental capacity, physical capacity, etc.), you have a much greater chance to help it.

I really hope that everything turns out well....and if an obstacle arises, I'm sure you'll find the best way to deal with it...you seem like a genuinely good human being and mother...good luck.