New element discovered

Discussion in 'Humor' started by Merlin1047, Aug 7, 2005.

  1. Merlin1047
    Offline

    Merlin1047 Senior Member

    Joined:
    Mar 28, 2004
    Messages:
    3,500
    Thanks Received:
    449
    Trophy Points:
    48
    Location:
    AL
    Ratings:
    +450
    Subject: New discovery: Managerium


    A major research institution has recently announced the discovery of the heaviest element yet known to science. This new element has been tentatively named "Managerium." Managerium has 1 neutron, 12 assistant neutrons, 75 deputy neutrons, and 111 assistant deputy neutrons, giving it an atomic mass of 312. These 312 particles are held together by forces called morons, which are surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles called peons.

    Since Managerium has no electrons, it is inert. However, it can be detected as it impedes every reaction with which it comes into contact. A minute amount of Managerium causes one reaction to take over 4 days to complete when it would normally take less than a second.

    Managerium has a normal half-life of 3 years; it does not decay but instead undergoes a reorganization in which a portion of the assistant neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places. In fact, Managerium's mass will actually increase over time, since each reorganization causes some morons to become neutrons, forming isodopes.

    This characteristic of moron-promotion leads some scientists to speculate that Managerium is formed whenever morons reach a certain quantity in concentration. This hypothetical quantity is referred to as "Critical Morass." You will know it when you see it.
     
    • Thank You! Thank You! x 1
  2. 007
    Offline

    007 Charter Member Supporting Member

    Joined:
    May 8, 2004
    Messages:
    38,589
    Thanks Received:
    7,921
    Trophy Points:
    1,130
    Ratings:
    +12,210
    Talk about a BELLY LAUGH...

    ROFLMFAO!

    I had to copy this and send it out in a mass email. :thup:
     
  3. MissileMan
    Offline

    MissileMan Senior Member

    Joined:
    Sep 11, 2004
    Messages:
    2,939
    Thanks Received:
    223
    Trophy Points:
    48
    Ratings:
    +223
    I believe this is closely related to Officerium which if not for the forces of the Nucleus of Ceaseless Organization, aka NCO, would fly apart in a thousand directions.
     
  4. Nienna
    Offline

    Nienna Senior Member

    Joined:
    Feb 24, 2005
    Messages:
    4,515
    Thanks Received:
    333
    Trophy Points:
    48
    Location:
    Ohio
    Ratings:
    +333
    That was great! :clap1:
     

Share This Page