My girlfriend's X lives with her parents... what do I do?

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by Dark Starscream, Oct 16, 2010.

  1. Dark Starscream
    Offline

    Dark Starscream Rookie

    Joined:
    Feb 7, 2009
    Messages:
    34
    Thanks Received:
    4
    Trophy Points:
    1
    Ratings:
    +4
    So I've been dating this girl for 3 months now. Her X-husband just moved back to Michigan from Wyoming, where he's been living the last 4 months. They have a son together, who has been living with her. He has no job, no car, and no home, so he lives with her parents... or just until he can "get on his feet." He is invited by her Mom and Dad to family get-togethers. He babysits her 3-year-old son, as well as her 3 other neices. He drives her car sometimes, as well as her Mom's car. She sees him everyday. Her son has intensely attached himself to him lately because he's been gone for so long.

    This whole situation makes me very uncomfortable. I don't like the amount of time she sees him, or that he lives with her family. How long should I let this go on? He grew up right here, his Mom, Sister, and friends all live in the same town, but he and his Mom don't get along, she doesn't even know he's in town, or that he ever went to Wyoming. My feelings are... that's not her parents problem. But they love him, in spite of being a total loser. They feed him. He and she lived with her parents for a year, separated, before he moved to Wyoming. He has no girlfriend, and told her he envies me.

    Does anyone else think this is wierd??? Any advice out there as to what she or I can do about this situation?
     
  2. uscitizen
    Offline

    uscitizen Senior Member

    Joined:
    May 6, 2007
    Messages:
    45,941
    Thanks Received:
    4,791
    Trophy Points:
    48
    Location:
    My Shack
    Ratings:
    +4,807
    Sounds like a new GF is needed.
    This one is not in the clear yet.
     
  3. CrusaderFrank
    Offline

    CrusaderFrank Diamond Member

    Joined:
    May 20, 2009
    Messages:
    81,148
    Thanks Received:
    14,897
    Trophy Points:
    2,210
    Ratings:
    +36,852
    Sounds like your gf's parents are troublemakers.

    You could play this a lot of different way, see if the local union will let you inflate on of their giant rats in front of the parents house, well maybe that's not a good idea.
     
  4. Douger
    Offline

    Douger BANNED

    Joined:
    Jun 25, 2009
    Messages:
    12,323
    Thanks Received:
    915
    Trophy Points:
    0
    Location:
    Not fucking there !
    Ratings:
    +915
    Send a recruiter over.
     
    • Thank You! Thank You! x 1
  5. goldcatt
    Offline

    goldcatt Catch me if you can! Supporting Member

    Joined:
    Aug 4, 2009
    Messages:
    10,330
    Thanks Received:
    2,331
    Trophy Points:
    48
    Location:
    CentralPA
    Ratings:
    +2,331
    This.

    And it's not going to change because you want it to. She probably couldn't change it if she wanted to. So are you OK with it staying this way? If not, get out now.
     
    • Thank You! Thank You! x 1
  6. xotoxi
    Offline

    xotoxi Platinum Member

    Joined:
    Mar 1, 2009
    Messages:
    30,322
    Thanks Received:
    5,203
    Trophy Points:
    1,110
    Location:
    your mother
    Ratings:
    +5,492
    What I think is weird is that you are axing us about this.

    What is even weirder is that you have 26 posts since Feb 2009.
     
  7. Sheldon
    Offline

    Sheldon Senior Member

    Joined:
    Apr 2, 2010
    Messages:
    5,215
    Thanks Received:
    1,328
    Trophy Points:
    48
    Ratings:
    +1,330
    The way you described it, it sounds like he's scheming to get back with her.

    How long should you let it go on? I'm not sure you have a say in this. You've been dating her for 3 months; they used to be married and have a kid together. You can't force him to get a job and move out. You can't tell her parents who they let stay in their house. You can't tell him he can't see his kid as often. And if you tell her how about your concern with how often she sees him then she'll probably play the "you don't trust me" card, which has its own set of problems.

    :eusa_eh:

    I would think that there's some heavy emotional baggage between them, and it sounds like her parents are on his side, maybe helping him scheme... I think you're the third wheel; you're the "outsider" in this situation.

    This is probably not what you want to hear but... there's other fish out there. I think this one still has a hook in her mouth.

    /Dr. Phil
     
  8. Paulie
    Offline

    Paulie Platinum Member

    Joined:
    May 19, 2007
    Messages:
    31,474
    Thanks Received:
    4,840
    Trophy Points:
    1,130
    Ratings:
    +15,257
    I wanna bang your wife, Dr Phil.
     
  9. Sallow
    Offline

    Sallow The Big Bad Wolf. Supporting Member

    Joined:
    Oct 4, 2010
    Messages:
    56,535
    Thanks Received:
    6,132
    Trophy Points:
    1,840
    Location:
    New York City
    Ratings:
    +7,394
    You might want to keep things a little on the light side until this is resolved. See her and other people.
     
  10. Paulie
    Offline

    Paulie Platinum Member

    Joined:
    May 19, 2007
    Messages:
    31,474
    Thanks Received:
    4,840
    Trophy Points:
    1,130
    Ratings:
    +15,257
    The kid's father and your girlfriend have a bond forever, from having a child. There's nothing you can do to change that, nor should you.

    What this dude's personal life is like is really none of your business.

    You seem insecure in your own relationship. Let the guy's own lack of accomplishment in life be his own downfall, and continue being the guy your girlfriend has fallen for.

    If you're threatened by a grown man who lives with his ex's parents, then you have bigger problems then just this relationship.
     

Share This Page