Well... as can be expected... Maureen Dowd is in her usual agreeable self this holiday season.....
The tone of her article (link below) makes her at least a candidate, if not hands down winner, for The Grinch or Ebeneezer Scrooge this holiday season.
Wow.... talk about a self centered, self absorbed, whiny, so and so!
Here are some highlights from her article ...
First line of the article
"If I hear "Frosty the Snowman" one more time, I'll rip his frozen face off...."
(KM - wow.... that sounds like hate crime in the making to me! Are snowmen a Designated Victim Group?)
"I've never said this out loud before, but I can't stand Christmas."
(KM - translation ... "Bah Humbug")
"Everyone in my family loves it except me, and they can't fathom why I get the mullygrubs, as a Southern friend of mine used to call a low-level depression, from Thanksgiving straight through New Year."
(KM - I wonder if there isn't an acronym for this condition? Like ADD or SAD or SCROOGE. I'm sure if I really tried hard enough, I might actually give a crap that Maureen Dowd isn't feeling happy. Well.... OK, I tried and I lied .... I actually CAN'T give a crap that Marueen Dowd is depressed. Call me ungenerous!)
"You're weird," my mom says. This from a woman who once left up our Christmas tree until April 3, and who listens to a radio station that plays carols 24/7 all month.
(KM - sounds to me like her mom has the ol' Christmas Spirit, how in the hell did she wind up with a scrooge like Maureen Dowd for a daughter? Must have been a mixup at the hospital, apparently! I know! Maureen Dowd's Mom and the Wicked Witch of the West must have both have gone into labor at about the same time)
"My mom and sister both blissfully sat through "It's a Wonderful Life" again on Thanksgiving weekend, while even hearing a mere snatch of that movie makes me want to scarf down a fistful of antidepressants - and join all the other women in America who are on a holiday high - except our family doctor is a Scrooge about designer drugs, leaving me to self-medicate as Clarence gets his wings with extra brandy in the eggnog."
(KM - Drinking and Driving, Water and Electricity, Maureen Dowd and Christmas--- some things just don't mix! I wonder if she just might go on a killing spree and wipe out all the Salvation Army Santas in New York.... do you think we ought to post a suicide watch on her?)
"It might be exacerbated by the stress I feel when I think of all the money I've spent on lavishing boyfriends with presents over the years, guys who are now living with other women who are enjoying my lovingly picked out presents which I'm no doubt still paying for in credit card interest charges."
(KM- Oh! so that's it! It's the guy's fault that she's such a grinch and a scrooge! Sounds like she could use a date with the Ghosts of Christmas Past, Present and Future!)
"Yep. I definitely need to rip Frosty's face off."
(KM - that does it! Call 911 before some innocent snowman gets killed!)
When God sends her to Hell... guess what song they'll be playing?
More from Ebeneezer Dowd Herself!
The tone of her article (link below) makes her at least a candidate, if not hands down winner, for The Grinch or Ebeneezer Scrooge this holiday season.
Wow.... talk about a self centered, self absorbed, whiny, so and so!
Here are some highlights from her article ...
First line of the article
"If I hear "Frosty the Snowman" one more time, I'll rip his frozen face off...."
(KM - wow.... that sounds like hate crime in the making to me! Are snowmen a Designated Victim Group?)
"I've never said this out loud before, but I can't stand Christmas."
(KM - translation ... "Bah Humbug")
"Everyone in my family loves it except me, and they can't fathom why I get the mullygrubs, as a Southern friend of mine used to call a low-level depression, from Thanksgiving straight through New Year."
(KM - I wonder if there isn't an acronym for this condition? Like ADD or SAD or SCROOGE. I'm sure if I really tried hard enough, I might actually give a crap that Maureen Dowd isn't feeling happy. Well.... OK, I tried and I lied .... I actually CAN'T give a crap that Marueen Dowd is depressed. Call me ungenerous!)
"You're weird," my mom says. This from a woman who once left up our Christmas tree until April 3, and who listens to a radio station that plays carols 24/7 all month.
(KM - sounds to me like her mom has the ol' Christmas Spirit, how in the hell did she wind up with a scrooge like Maureen Dowd for a daughter? Must have been a mixup at the hospital, apparently! I know! Maureen Dowd's Mom and the Wicked Witch of the West must have both have gone into labor at about the same time)
"My mom and sister both blissfully sat through "It's a Wonderful Life" again on Thanksgiving weekend, while even hearing a mere snatch of that movie makes me want to scarf down a fistful of antidepressants - and join all the other women in America who are on a holiday high - except our family doctor is a Scrooge about designer drugs, leaving me to self-medicate as Clarence gets his wings with extra brandy in the eggnog."
(KM - Drinking and Driving, Water and Electricity, Maureen Dowd and Christmas--- some things just don't mix! I wonder if she just might go on a killing spree and wipe out all the Salvation Army Santas in New York.... do you think we ought to post a suicide watch on her?)
"It might be exacerbated by the stress I feel when I think of all the money I've spent on lavishing boyfriends with presents over the years, guys who are now living with other women who are enjoying my lovingly picked out presents which I'm no doubt still paying for in credit card interest charges."
(KM- Oh! so that's it! It's the guy's fault that she's such a grinch and a scrooge! Sounds like she could use a date with the Ghosts of Christmas Past, Present and Future!)
"Yep. I definitely need to rip Frosty's face off."
(KM - that does it! Call 911 before some innocent snowman gets killed!)
When God sends her to Hell... guess what song they'll be playing?
More from Ebeneezer Dowd Herself!
