Man is woman's best friend

Man is a woman's best friend.

He will reassure her when she feels insecure and comfort her after
a bad day.

He will inspire her to do things she never thought she could do;
to live without fear and forget regret.

He will enable her to express her deepest emotions
and give in to her most intimate desires.

He will make sure she always feels that she's the most beautiful
woman in the room and will enable her to be confident,
sexy, seductive, and invincible.



No wait...... sorry....... I'm thinking of wine.

It’s wine that does all that.

Sorry.

 

Forgetting is freedom.

 

Women and their moods and feelings.

 

Uncle Ferd says, "Yea...

... any ya'll honey's need a friend...

... here I am."

 

I've always thought men were like. . . .

BANK ACCOUNTS
Without a lot of money, they don't generate much interest.

BLENDERS
You need one, but you're not quite sure why.

CHOCOLATE BARS
Sweet, smooth, and they usually head right for your hips.

COFFEE
The best ones are rich, warm, and can keep you up all night long.

COMMERCIALS
You can't believe a word they say.

COMPUTERS
Hard to figure out and never have enough memory.

COOLERS
Load them with beer and you can take them anywhere.

COPIERS
You need them for reproduction, but that's about it.

CURLING IRONS
They're always hot, and they're always in your hair.

GOVERNMENT BONDS
They take so long to mature.

HOROSCOPES
They always tell you what to do and are usually wrong.

LAVA LAMPS
Fun to look at, but not all that bright.

MASCARA
They usually run at the first sign of emotion.

PARKING SPOTS
The good ones are already taken and the ones that are left
are either handicapped or extremely small.

POPCORN
They satisfy you, but only for a little while.

Nevertheless. . . .

I sure wouldn't want a world that didn't have them.