Man Gets Six Months for Rape of Picnic Table

[chanel]

BELLEVUE, OH -- Police say a man was arrested after admitting to, and being caught on DVD having sex with his picnic table repeatedly.

Investigators say they received a tip that Art Price Jr., 40, of 146 Brinker St. in Bellevue was having sex with a picnic table while outside on the deck. The incidents occurred between January and March 2008.

Police say on March 13, the tipster dropped off three DVDs which showed Price in the act. On four occasions, Price is seen naked and masturbating in the rear room near the open doorway; he then comes out to the deck. He tilts the metal round picnic table on its side and lays up against it and has sexual intercourse with the table. Afterwards he cleans the table and the deck.

Man caught having sex with table gets 6 months : News : WNWO NBC24

(Ok. Board is painfully slow, and now I can't wrap quotes. What's up?)

Fair sentence?

 

[strollingbones]

it was his picnic table...wtf.....


i guess this was just not his hole...

 

[strollingbones]

o and you cant give rep either...just mentioning a board problem

 

[California Girl]

The Brits have a saying 'there's nought as queer as folks'... people are weird. Sentence seems a tad harsh... unless the table suffers some emotional distress.

 

[Ringel05]

The Brits have a saying 'there's nought as queer as folks'... people are weird. Sentence seems a tad harsh... unless the table suffers some emotional distress.

Do they even have rape counselors for inanimate objects?
(Uuummmm. I smell profit. Jillian, I'll be the expert witness for the table in it's lawsuit against the locality, county, state and federal government for not have sufficient protections in place for inanimate objects.
(I'm starting the School of Inanimates Psychology. Send in you registration packets now!)

 

[L.K.Eder]

how old was the table?

 

[Xenophon]

That Yukon sure is a pistol.

 

[jillian]

I'd think the sore schwinkie would be punishment enough...

ah well..

 

[xsited1]

Man Gets Six Months for Rape of Picnic Table

I guess it wasn't consensual. If he'd just called the picnic table in the morning, he probably wouldn't have been arrested.

 

[Paulie]

He wasn't sentenced because he had sex with a table, he was sentenced because he acted indecently where others were in view of the act.

The fact that he got 6 months tells me he probably had prior charges, because typically you can do something pretty damn bad and get away with just probation as long as it's your first offense.

 

[LuckyDan]

He must be a member of some fetishist splinter group.

 

[L.K.Eder]

He wasn't sentenced because he had sex with a table, he was sentenced because he acted indecently where others were in view of the act.

The fact that he got 6 months tells me he probably had prior charges, because typically you can do something pretty damn bad and get away with just probation as long as it's your first offense.

that picnic table had connections, i tell ya

 

[Paulie]

He wasn't sentenced because he had sex with a table, he was sentenced because he acted indecently where others were in view of the act.

The fact that he got 6 months tells me he probably had prior charges, because typically you can do something pretty damn bad and get away with just probation as long as it's your first offense.

that picnic table had connections, i tell ya

Must have been one sexy ass picnic table.

 

[strollingbones]

proving yet again, men will fuck anything

 

[Paulie]

proving yet again, men will fuck anything

Put a set of 6 inch heels at the bottom of the table legs, maybe fit a garter belt on to it, and a sexy silk laced pink bra and thong, and I might just consider it!