FEMALE PRAYER Before I lay me down to sleep, I pray for a man who's not a creep. One who's handsome, smart & strong. One who loves to listen long. One who thinks before he speaks. When he says he'll call, he won't wait weeks. I pray that he is gainfully employed When I spend his cash he won't be annoyed. Pulls out my chair and opens my door. Massages my back & begs to do more. Oh! Send me a man who'll make love to my mind, Knows what to answer to "How big is my behind?" I pray that this man will love me to no end, And never attempt to hit on my friend. Amen. MALE PRAYER I pray for a deaf-mute nymphomaniac with huge breasts who owns a liquor store & a boat. Amen.