Lib vs Conservative decision making process

Discussion in 'Humor' started by Merlin1047, Aug 18, 2005.

  1. Merlin1047
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    Merlin1047 Senior Member

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    Question: How do you tell the difference between
    Democrats, Republicans And Southern Republicans?

    Here is a little test that will help you decide. The answer
    can be found by posing the following question:

    You're walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small
    children. Suddenly, an Islamic Terrorist with a huge knife comes
    around the corner, locks eyes with you, screams obscenities, praises
    Allah, raises the knife, and charges at you. You are carrying a Glock
    cal .40, and you are an expert shot?

    You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family.

    What do you do?

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    Democrat's Answer:

    Well, that's not enough information to answer the question!

    Does the man look poor! Or oppressed?

    Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to attack?

    Where is his sense of community?

    Could we run away?

    What does my wife think?

    What about the kids?

    Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife out of
    his hand?

    What does the law say about this situation?

    Does the Glock have appropriate safety built into it?

    Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind of message does
    this send to society and to my children?

    Is it possible he'd be happy with just killing me?

    Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be content just to
    wound me?

    If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my family get away
    while he was stabbing me?

    Should I call 9-1-1?

    Why is this street so deserted?

    We need to raise taxes, have a paint and weed day and make this
    happier, healthier street that would discourage such behavior.

    This is all so confusing! I need to debate this with
    some friends for few days and try to come to a consensus.

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    Republican's Answer:

    BANG!

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    Southern Republican's Answer:

    BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
    BANG! click.....(sounds of reloading).

    BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
    BANG! click
     
  2. Annie
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    Annie Diamond Member

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    Ya gotta admit, it's weird how fast jokes morph! :laugh:

    http://www.usmessageboard.com/forums/showthread.php?t=24072
     

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