Lawyer Advice needed (child support)

G.T.

Diamond Member
Jun 29, 2009
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I was hanging with my friend this weekend, and was shocked to hear his Support situation. Please offer any advice if there is any.

He has 2 little girls.

He has them every other week, for the full week, bringing them to school and everything. The clothing they wear, the food they eat, etc. are all exclusive to his house, they don't bring anything from Mom's to wear or / eat or / play with.

Mom is bi-polar and lives with her parents.

Despite equal time with the kids, despite Dad being the better parent and despite Dad living on his own while mom is supported by her parents, New York State forces Dad to pay 25% of his gross pay towards child support, and Mom does not spend a dime of it on sending the kids to Dad's for the weeks.

In my opinion, this is Gender Discrimination.

Women fought for equal rights, under the Law. This doesn't mean that men should in turn be discriminated against in such a way. I'd love to help this dude out.
 
I was hanging with my friend this weekend, and was shocked to hear his Support situation. Please offer any advice if there is any.

He has 2 little girls.

He has them every other week, for the full week, bringing them to school and everything. The clothing they wear, the food they eat, etc. are all exclusive to his house, they don't bring anything from Mom's to wear or / eat or / play with.

Mom is bi-polar and lives with her parents.

Despite equal time with the kids, despite Dad being the better parent and despite Dad living on his own while mom is supported by her parents, New York State forces Dad to pay 25% of his gross pay towards child support, and Mom does not spend a dime of it on sending the kids to Dad's for the weeks.

In my opinion, this is Gender Discrimination.

Women fought for equal rights, under the Law. This doesn't mean that men should in turn be discriminated against in such a way. I'd love to help this dude out.

There are so many men out there in the same situation or worse, the courts go in the favor of the woman no matter what, the only way they don't is if the woman is a convicted felon, actually in prison or can be proven to be unfit which is hard. The only advice I can give is to go back to court and try to get the agreement changed, I don't see why he paying so much money if he sees his kids so often, a friend of mine in the Military had to pay his ex wife $1600 a month in child support, she used most of that to party with her new boyfriend while my friend went coach hopping. With stories like this I don't know why men ever get married, the women hold all the cards in divorce proceedings and child support.
 
I was hanging with my friend this weekend, and was shocked to hear his Support situation. Please offer any advice if there is any.

He has 2 little girls.

He has them every other week, for the full week, bringing them to school and everything. The clothing they wear, the food they eat, etc. are all exclusive to his house, they don't bring anything from Mom's to wear or / eat or / play with.

Mom is bi-polar and lives with her parents.

Despite equal time with the kids, despite Dad being the better parent and despite Dad living on his own while mom is supported by her parents, New York State forces Dad to pay 25% of his gross pay towards child support, and Mom does not spend a dime of it on sending the kids to Dad's for the weeks.

In my opinion, this is Gender Discrimination.

Women fought for equal rights, under the Law. This doesn't mean that men should in turn be discriminated against in such a way. I'd love to help this dude out.

There are so many men out there in the same situation or worse, the courts go in the favor of the woman no matter what, the only way they don't is if the woman is a convicted felon, actually in prison or can be proven to be unfit which is hard. The only advice I can give is to go back to court and try to get the agreement changed, I don't see why he paying so much money if he sees his kids so often, a friend of mine in the Military had to pay his ex wife $1600 a month in child support, she used most of that to party with her new boyfriend while my friend went coach hopping. With stories like this I don't know why men ever get married, the women hold all the cards in divorce proceedings and child support.

Perhaps it's high-time Men fight for equal Parental/Marital rights, under the Law then. It would be hard for me to get THAT passionate about it since I'm happily Married and what not though, with no kids.
 
I was hanging with my friend this weekend, and was shocked to hear his Support situation. Please offer any advice if there is any.

He has 2 little girls.

He has them every other week, for the full week, bringing them to school and everything. The clothing they wear, the food they eat, etc. are all exclusive to his house, they don't bring anything from Mom's to wear or / eat or / play with.

Mom is bi-polar and lives with her parents.

Despite equal time with the kids, despite Dad being the better parent and despite Dad living on his own while mom is supported by her parents, New York State forces Dad to pay 25% of his gross pay towards child support, and Mom does not spend a dime of it on sending the kids to Dad's for the weeks.

In my opinion, this is Gender Discrimination.

Women fought for equal rights, under the Law. This doesn't mean that men should in turn be discriminated against in such a way. I'd love to help this dude out.

There are so many men out there in the same situation or worse, the courts go in the favor of the woman no matter what, the only way they don't is if the woman is a convicted felon, actually in prison or can be proven to be unfit which is hard. The only advice I can give is to go back to court and try to get the agreement changed, I don't see why he paying so much money if he sees his kids so often, a friend of mine in the Military had to pay his ex wife $1600 a month in child support, she used most of that to party with her new boyfriend while my friend went coach hopping. With stories like this I don't know why men ever get married, the women hold all the cards in divorce proceedings and child support.

Perhaps it's high-time Men fight for equal Parental/Marital rights, under the Law then. It would be hard for me to get THAT passionate about it since I'm happily Married and what not though, with no kids.

Trying to change any of this will be seen as an attack on womens rights, all hell would break loose.
 
Anyone seeing it as an attack on Women's rights would be pretty delusional.
 
Anyone seeing it as an attack on Women's rights would be pretty delusional.

Alot of women who get child support would see men trying to change the system as a threat, your taking away the money alot of these women use to get their hair and nails done and to tear up the clubs on the weekend, can't be having that.:razz:
 
I call for a reforming of the system. I will shout it from my telephone pole shortly.
 
Does she work? It doesn't sound like it if she is being supported by her parents.

Not sure how he expects to get money from someone that is unemployable.
 
Does she work? It doesn't sound like it if she is being supported by her parents.

Not sure how he expects to get money from someone that is unemployable.

He's not trying to get money from her.
 
I was hanging with my friend this weekend, and was shocked to hear his Support situation. Please offer any advice if there is any.

He has 2 little girls.

He has them every other week, for the full week, bringing them to school and everything. The clothing they wear, the food they eat, etc. are all exclusive to his house, they don't bring anything from Mom's to wear or / eat or / play with.

Mom is bi-polar and lives with her parents.

Despite equal time with the kids, despite Dad being the better parent and despite Dad living on his own while mom is supported by her parents, New York State forces Dad to pay 25% of his gross pay towards child support, and Mom does not spend a dime of it on sending the kids to Dad's for the weeks.

In my opinion, this is Gender Discrimination.

Women fought for equal rights, under the Law. This doesn't mean that men should in turn be discriminated against in such a way. I'd love to help this dude out.

He's fucked.

There's no such thing as screwing over the father. so unless he wants to pony up a lot of money to get a great lawyer....


Here in PA, I was informed that "I" would have to prove my ex was physically abusing our kids to have a "chance" at custody.

It's screwed up. Someone desided long ago that women are always better at parenting, no matter what the situation is.
 
Does she work? It doesn't sound like it if she is being supported by her parents.

Not sure how he expects to get money from someone that is unemployable.

He's not trying to get money from her.
So he's trying to avoid paying child support.

hmmmm....I think 25% seems fair if she is bi-polar and cannot work. Shouldn't he have thought this through before he had kids with her?

Does he have evidence that she is spending the money on something other than the children? If so, maybe he could ask the judge to change it so the money goes to her parents with strict instructions that it can only be spent on the children.

Or if she really is bi-polar and cannot function, he should try to get full time custody.
 
I was hanging with my friend this weekend, and was shocked to hear his Support situation. Please offer any advice if there is any.

He has 2 little girls.

He has them every other week, for the full week, bringing them to school and everything. The clothing they wear, the food they eat, etc. are all exclusive to his house, they don't bring anything from Mom's to wear or / eat or / play with.

Mom is bi-polar and lives with her parents.

Despite equal time with the kids, despite Dad being the better parent and despite Dad living on his own while mom is supported by her parents, New York State forces Dad to pay 25% of his gross pay towards child support, and Mom does not spend a dime of it on sending the kids to Dad's for the weeks.

In my opinion, this is Gender Discrimination.

Women fought for equal rights, under the Law. This doesn't mean that men should in turn be discriminated against in such a way. I'd love to help this dude out.

He's fucked.

There's no such thing as screwing over the father. so unless he wants to pony up a lot of money to get a great lawyer....


Here in PA, I was informed that "I" would have to prove my ex was physically abusing our kids to have a "chance" at custody.

It's screwed up. Someone desided long ago that women are always better at parenting, no matter what the situation is.

Custody battles is a whole nother issue. I'm trying to figure out if any Lawyers can help him with the support situation, because their custody split is 50/50 so it makes no damned sense that he's paying child support to subsidize her 1/2 of the time with them. It doesn't make a lick of logical sense, it is not fair and it's got no basis in reason.
 
Does she work? It doesn't sound like it if she is being supported by her parents.

Not sure how he expects to get money from someone that is unemployable.

He's not trying to get money from her.
So he's trying to avoid paying child support.

hmmmm....I think 25% seems fair if she is bi-polar and cannot work. Shouldn't he have thought this through before he had kids with her?

Does he have evidence that she is spending the money on something other than the children? If so, maybe he could ask the judge to change it so the money goes to her parents with strict instructions that it can only be spent on the children.

Or if she really is bi-polar and cannot function, he should try to get full time custody.

I don't think she's diagnosed bi-polar, and she def. has a job.

I don't see where 25% is fair at all. It's not logical or fair. 0% would be what's fair.
 
He's not trying to get money from her.
So he's trying to avoid paying child support.

hmmmm....I think 25% seems fair if she is bi-polar and cannot work. Shouldn't he have thought this through before he had kids with her?

Does he have evidence that she is spending the money on something other than the children? If so, maybe he could ask the judge to change it so the money goes to her parents with strict instructions that it can only be spent on the children.

Or if she really is bi-polar and cannot function, he should try to get full time custody.

I don't think she's diagnosed bi-polar, and she def. has a job.

I don't see where 25% is fair at all. It's not logical or fair. 0% would be what's fair.
If she isn't bipolar, that is a different story. Very confusing.

How much per month does he pay vs. what she pays?
 
I used to have some links re: male parental rights and financial support.
The links are long gone, as are the memories thank goodness.
Good luck to your buddy.

Several years ago myself and two close friends each finally got out from under support/maintenance at the same time coincidentally.

We went to Vegas. :thup:
 

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