King Thorgrim's Battle Axe

Discussion in 'Education' started by USViking, Sep 13, 2005.

  1. USViking
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    USViking VIP Member

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    The battleaxe used as my avatar was found in a state
    of near miraculous preservation at an archeological excavation
    on the grounds of Elsinor castle.

    Other artifacts prove it was the personal weapon of
    King Thorgrim the Terrible (fl. ca. 800CE), one of the
    initiators of the centuries of Viking raids, and one of
    the the most rapacious figures of the era, having hewn
    the Faithful all the way up the Thames to the walls of
    London, and all the way up the Seine to the walls of Paris.

    Thorgrim is known to have led the charge in a number
    of battles. The most famous was one which took place
    along a French river. While sailing up the river, Thorgrim
    and his fleet encountered two armies of the Faithful,
    one on each bank.

    The Vikings immediately landed on one bank, routed the
    opposing army with great slaughter, and cruelly tortured
    all prisoners in full view of the army on the other bank,
    which fled in panic at the sight, rather than risk suffering
    the same fate.

    Micrscopic anaysis of the axeblade revealed lingering traces
    of blood and gore. These have been removed for forensic
    historical studies. What an awful sight that blade must often
    have been, before Thorgrim wiped it clean!

    I plan to keep my own version clean as well, in consideration
    for our more fainthearted members.
     
  2. Gunny
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    Gunny Gold Member

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    Has EVERYONE kicked France's ass?
     
  3. CSM
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    CSM Senior Member

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    NO! But then Switzerland chooses to remain neutral....
     

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