Not mine, but some really funny ones I found: "Why is television (or the print media) called a medium? Because it is neither rare nor well-done." You can lead a reporter to a story, but you can't make him think. A totalitarian socialist invades the country and goes up to the first people he sees (a politician and a journalist) and says "I'm a totalitarian socialist and I just invaded to destroy your economy. What do you think about that?" The journalist replies "I don't think, I just write what the politician thinks." The journalist and the other totalitarian both look at the politician for a response. The politician glances about furtively and says "What would you like me to think about that?"