Is Violence Against Women EVER Justified?

[BluePhantom]

Alot of people don't have the money to leave, I had to live with my ex wife for a year before I saved up enough money to move out and she saved up enough money to move back to the islands, let me tell you living with a woman who will is pretty much your ex just counting the days until she leaves is a living hell. I was in the Military at the time and they forbid me from throwing her out too.

I was in that situation with my first wife. For financial reasons we were just stuck together even after our divorce was final for quite some time. It was not a pleasant experience.

 

[Dr.Drock]

The links say nothing about whether or not the woman was abusive before the child. Sure maybe that depression can cause a woman with bad issues to become a woman with horrendous issues. But I'm still not buying a great woman morphing into a monster, and your link doesn't show that.

Well if I am forced to choose between the medical research and the degree to which you happen to buy it, I will go with the documentation.

Then he should've done the things I outlined. I know you're defensive about your buddy hence the childish insults, but he's an idiot. We all have a friend or two who does idiotic things. He's yours.

I seem to recall that you were the one who started with the childish insults, chum. Regardless, you are certainly entitled to your opinion regarding his actions. I think he did the right thing and applaud him....you are certainly within your rights to disagree.

The medical research in no way disputes my claim.

And I wasn't, but that's not important.

 

[High_Gravity]

Alot of people don't have the money to leave, I had to live with my ex wife for a year before I saved up enough money to move out and she saved up enough money to move back to the islands, let me tell you living with a woman who will is pretty much your ex just counting the days until she leaves is a living hell. I was in the Military at the time and they forbid me from throwing her out too.

I was in that situation with my first wife. For financial reasons we were just stuck together even after our divorce was final for quite some time. It was not a pleasant experience.

I feel your pain, I tried to spend as much time out of the house as possible and my house felt like a prison, I wouldn't wish this shit on anyone, we were both far away from home stationed at Vandenberg AFB in the middle of nowhere in California, we had nowhere to go, it was hell.

 

[sealybobo]

I only answered this one: If she opens that door, it’s open season. She is no different than a man at that point,

Because I heard a story where 3 guys were breaking into a man's home and he blew away the first one that walked through the door and he heard one of the other three say to the other one, "oh shit they shot rayray" So there were at least 3 people at the door. Luckily for the man they ran because he only loaded one bullet in the gun.

That could have been a woman at the door. So if she walks through that door, she's going to get shot just the same as Ray Ray did.

But as far as fighting, I have been pushed to the edge by a woman once. She was hysterical and was going to drunk drive a car and I had to give her a smack in the face. It worked. She no longer wanted to drive that car. But for the next 3 days all I heard was "I can't believe you would hit a woman".

 

[TrinityPower]

I feel each scenario presented so far have merit as to the reason for the action. It is for me not a blanket yes or no answer. In the last story presented I see the point that you did this to protect her own safety. I will say i bet in more cases than not some sort of substance is involved or a medical determination if looked into and proven as to the cause of the instability of a given individual doing the attacking and in this discussion it being the female gender.

 

[High_Gravity]

I only answered this one: If she opens that door, it’s open season. She is no different than a man at that point,

Because I heard a story where 3 guys were breaking into a man's home and he blew away the first one that walked through the door and he heard one of the other three say to the other one, "oh shit they shot rayray" So there were at least 3 people at the door. Luckily for the man they ran because he only loaded one bullet in the gun.

That could have been a woman at the door. So if she walks through that door, she's going to get shot just the same as Ray Ray did.

But as far as fighting, I have been pushed to the edge by a woman once. She was hysterical and was going to drunk drive a car and I had to give her a smack in the face. It worked. She no longer wanted to drive that car. But for the next 3 days all I heard was "I can't believe you would hit a woman".

That slap in the face probably saved her life, and/or the lives of others.

 

[Dont Taz Me Bro]

No, he takes off and takes the kid with him. Last I checked it was his kid too. If she wants him back then she can go to the courts and file suit. That is exactly what I did. My ex-wife got involved in substance abuse shortly after our son was born (and I wouldn't doubt she had done it before) and when it became clear that she wasn't going to make the effort to get over it that is exactly what I did. I took my son and left. After a few court hearings I was granted full custody and we now live eight states away and have absolutely nothing to do with her.

In many states that's considered kidnapping. It's not always possible.

Only if there is a custody order in place naming her as the primary custodial parent and addressing visitation rights, etc. If not, there's nothing anyone can do until a custody order is in place by a judge.

 

[BluePhantom]

And I wasn't, but that's not important.

Ok. If you say so.

 

[BluePhantom]

Only if there is a custody order in place naming her as the primary custodial parent and addressing visitation rights, etc. If not, there's nothing anyone can do until a custody order is in place by a judge.

I think it depends on intent and possibly whether state lines are crossed. If a father just takes his kid on an unannounced vacation yeah that's one thing, but to grab your kid and completely move (especially to another state)...boy you are playing with fire. Ultimately the courts may clear you but it doesn't mean you won't face some charges or at least a pretty complex legal situation depending on the exact circumstances.

 

[High_Gravity]

Only if there is a custody order in place naming her as the primary custodial parent and addressing visitation rights, etc. If not, there's nothing anyone can do until a custody order is in place by a judge.

I think it depends on intent and possibly whether state lines are crossed. If a father just takes his kid on an unannounced vacation yeah that's one thing, but to grab your kid and completely move (especially to another state)...boy you are playing with fire. Ultimately the courts may clear you but it doesn't mean you won't face some charges or at least a pretty complex legal situation depending on the exact circumstances.

If you move to a country with no extradition agreements with the US you will be good to go.

 

[BluePhantom]

I feel each scenario presented so far have merit as to the reason for the action. It is for me not a blanket yes or no answer. In the last story presented I see the point that you did this to protect her own safety. I will say i bet in more cases than not some sort of substance is involved or a medical determination if looked into and proven as to the cause of the instability of a given individual doing the attacking and in this discussion it being the female gender.

I would tend to agree and I don't think it's necessary to quote statistics that the vast majority of violence occurs when drugs or especially alcohol is involved. In regards to postpartum depression or pregnancy itself causing increased incidence of violence I would say usually it would be a medical situation (the woman's body is surging with hormones) and it is causing her to think, and therefore behave, irrationally. Then of course you have people who just finally reached their tipping point and just let loose. I have seen a few incidents of that and it's a pretty ugly thing.

I think the overall theme though is that violence against anyone is really not the greatest way to go. It's always better to find a rational solution and even though I argued earlier that there are occasionally "times to fight" I would say those are exceptions and not the rule. At the same time I would say that the examples I listed (especially the last two) were also exceptions to the rule. My brother does not go around beating up women. In fact that's the only time in my life that I know of that he did. So that's not his usual character (although he has no problem scrapping with men and of course, growing up in Idaho where "bar fighting" is the official state sport he is certainly not unique in that regard).

It also may be a cultural thing regarding geography. I have lived in all corners of this nation and a few in between and I can say with great confidence that a good fist fight in Idaho is viewed and undertaken a hell of a lot differently than one in Phoenix or Pittsburgh.

 

[High_Gravity]

I feel each scenario presented so far have merit as to the reason for the action. It is for me not a blanket yes or no answer. In the last story presented I see the point that you did this to protect her own safety. I will say i bet in more cases than not some sort of substance is involved or a medical determination if looked into and proven as to the cause of the instability of a given individual doing the attacking and in this discussion it being the female gender.

I would tend to agree and I don't think it's necessary to quote statistics that the vast majority of violence occurs when drugs or especially alcohol is involved. In regards to postpartum depression or pregnancy itself causing increased incidence of violence I would say usually it would be a medical situation (the woman's body is surging with hormones) and it is causing her to think, and therefore behave, irrationally. Then of course you have people who just finally reached their tipping point and just let loose. I have seen a few incidents of that and it's a pretty ugly thing.

I think the overall theme though is that violence against anyone is really not the greatest way to go. It's always better to find a rational solution and even though I argued earlier that there are occasionally "times to fight" I would say those are exceptions and not the rule. At the same time I would say that the examples I listed (especially the last two) were also exceptions to the rule. My brother does not go around beating up women. In fact that's the only time in my life that I know of that he did. So that's not his usual character (although he has no problem scrapping with men and of course, growing up in Idaho where "bar fighting" is the official state sport he is certainly not unique in that regard).

It also may be a cultural thing regarding geography. I have lived in all corners of this nation and a few in between and I can say with great confidence that a good fist fight in Idaho is viewed and undertaken a hell of a lot differently than one in Phoenix or Pittsburgh.

Most cops are overworked and underpaid, they really don't want to arrest you unless you give them reason to, when I was in the service I got into a fist fight with a meth head who was trying to go across the bar and attack a female bartender, I punched him in his fuckin face and the police got there quick, they handcuffed both of us but after talking to witnesses they found out that the other guy started it and they let me go, the other guy was cussing and kicking things so they took him in because he was belligerent.

 

[BluePhantom]

Most cops are overworked and underpaid, they really don't want to arrest you unless you give them reason to, when I was in the service I got into a fist fight with a meth head who was trying to go across the bar and attack a female bartender, I punched him in his fuckin face and the police got there quick, they handcuffed both of us but after talking to witnesses they found out that the other guy started it and they let me go, the other guy was cussing and kicking things so they took him in because he was belligerent.

Well I can tell you that the laws are quite different from state to state. In Arizona they are flat out ridiculous. If the police are called for a domestic dispute someone is going to jail...end of story. They will decide who it is when they get there but by law they have to arrest someone. They passed that law just in the last few years because too often they would go to the house and it was just an argument at that point and then they would leave and someone would end up dead or severely fucked up. So in order to enforce that law basically anything that is considered aggressive is now considered "domestic violence" in Arizona. Something as small as telling your wife "you are really being a bitch right now" is enough for them to charge you with domestic violence. It's insane.

 

[BluePhantom]

It also may be a cultural thing regarding geography. I have lived in all corners of this nation and a few in between and I can say with great confidence that a good fist fight in Idaho is viewed and undertaken a hell of a lot differently than one in Phoenix or Pittsburgh.

Just to follow up on this point; think about it....In Idaho or Texas or Wyoming or someplace like that, if you insult a man's wife the fists will be flying within seconds...maybe a minute at most. Now in Pittsburgh it takes a good half hour for anyone to start throwing hooks 'cause there's an entire cultural procedure that must be recognized. You have to:

1) establish your opponent's identity ("who the fuck are you? WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU?" Oh you don't know? Well who the fuck do you THINK you are?")

2) you have to introduce yourself ("do you know who I am? Do you know who the fuck you are dealing with?")

3) you must establish your credentials ("I have fucked with guys all over this nation mother fucker. I've fucked with guys in Brooklyn, New Jersey, Miami...I've been around mother fucker")

4) you must present your plan of attack ("do you know what the fuck I'm going to do you? Do you have any fucking idea what the fuck I'm gonna do to you? I'm gonna jam that cue stick straight up your ass, mother fucker")

5) you must check to ensure your opponent has full understanding ("have you fucking figured this out mother fucker? Have you got it through your fucking head how bad you are gonna get fucked up?")

.......you know....it takes forever. In Idaho it's really quick. "Hey your wife's a bitch"...KAPOW!!!!!

 

[TrinityPower]

It also may be a cultural thing regarding geography. I have lived in all corners of this nation and a few in between and I can say with great confidence that a good fist fight in Idaho is viewed and undertaken a hell of a lot differently than one in Phoenix or Pittsburgh.

Just to follow up on this point; think about it....In Idaho or Texas or Wyoming or someplace like that, if you insult a man's wife the fists will be flying within seconds...maybe a minute at most. Now in Pittsburgh it takes a good half hour for anyone to start throwing hooks 'cause there's an entire cultural procedure that must be recognized. You have to:

1) establish your opponent's identity ("who the fuck are you? WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU?" Oh you don't know? Well who the fuck do you THINK you are?")

2) you have to introduce yourself ("do you know who I am? Do you know who the fuck you are dealing with?")

3) you must establish your credentials ("I have fucked with guys all over this nation mother fucker. I've fucked with guys in Brooklyn, New Jersey, Miami...I've been around mother fucker")

4) you must present your plan of attack ("do you know what the fuck I'm going to do you? Do you have any fucking idea what the fuck I'm gonna do to you? I'm gonna jam that cue stick straight up your ass, mother fucker")

5) you must check to ensure your opponent has full understanding ("have you fucking figured this out mother fucker? Have you got it through your fucking head how bad you are gonna get fucked up?")

.......you know....it takes forever. In Idaho it's really quick. "Hey your wife's a bitch"...KAPOW!!!!!

There must be some sort of physical act the precedes it as well like strong act of finger pointing a middle finger salute or the ever popular grabbing of the private area which by the way I have never understood since women don't grab their breast and shake it at you to show anger but I digress...lol

 

[BluePhantom]

It also may be a cultural thing regarding geography. I have lived in all corners of this nation and a few in between and I can say with great confidence that a good fist fight in Idaho is viewed and undertaken a hell of a lot differently than one in Phoenix or Pittsburgh.

Just to follow up on this point; think about it....In Idaho or Texas or Wyoming or someplace like that, if you insult a man's wife the fists will be flying within seconds...maybe a minute at most. Now in Pittsburgh it takes a good half hour for anyone to start throwing hooks 'cause there's an entire cultural procedure that must be recognized. You have to:

1) establish your opponent's identity ("who the fuck are you? WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU?" Oh you don't know? Well who the fuck do you THINK you are?")

2) you have to introduce yourself ("do you know who I am? Do you know who the fuck you are dealing with?")

3) you must establish your credentials ("I have fucked with guys all over this nation mother fucker. I've fucked with guys in Brooklyn, New Jersey, Miami...I've been around mother fucker")

4) you must present your plan of attack ("do you know what the fuck I'm going to do you? Do you have any fucking idea what the fuck I'm gonna do to you? I'm gonna jam that cue stick straight up your ass, mother fucker")

5) you must check to ensure your opponent has full understanding ("have you fucking figured this out mother fucker? Have you got it through your fucking head how bad you are gonna get fucked up?")

.......you know....it takes forever. In Idaho it's really quick. "Hey your wife's a bitch"...KAPOW!!!!!

There must be some sort of physical act the precedes it as well like strong act of finger pointing a middle finger salute or the ever popular grabbing of the private area which by the way I have never understood since women don't grab their breast and shake it at you to show anger but I digress...lol

Actually from my experience the east coast guys do the "ball grabbing" while they are observing the pre-fight etiquette....usually in between steps. So for example between steps one and two they grab their balls, look at their friends and say things like "mother fucker...this guy, huh?" a lot.

 

[sealybobo]

I only answered this one: If she opens that door, it’s open season. She is no different than a man at that point,

Because I heard a story where 3 guys were breaking into a man's home and he blew away the first one that walked through the door and he heard one of the other three say to the other one, "oh shit they shot rayray" So there were at least 3 people at the door. Luckily for the man they ran because he only loaded one bullet in the gun.

That could have been a woman at the door. So if she walks through that door, she's going to get shot just the same as Ray Ray did.

But as far as fighting, I have been pushed to the edge by a woman once. She was hysterical and was going to drunk drive a car and I had to give her a smack in the face. It worked. She no longer wanted to drive that car. But for the next 3 days all I heard was "I can't believe you would hit a woman".

That slap in the face probably saved her life, and/or the lives of others.

Funny story, same girl. We were broken up. I was subletting my college apartment over the summer to a couple girls. They let us crash there if we were up for the weekend. So I'm passed out on the floor when I hear a knock at the door. It was my ex girlfriend but I was drunk and still rubbing the sandman out of my eyes when I opened the door and said, "bridget?" It wasn't Bridget, it was Andrea my ex girlfriend. She says, "BRIDGET, WHO THE HELL IS BRIDGET?" and punches me in the stomach as hard as she can.

Can you imagine a guy doing this to a woman? How can any woman on USMB justify what she did?

I should have pressed charges. Nah, women want it both ways. They want to be equal but treated differently when they lay their hands on us. I love it on Cops when the woman gets arrested for domestic violence.

 

[sealybobo]

It also may be a cultural thing regarding geography. I have lived in all corners of this nation and a few in between and I can say with great confidence that a good fist fight in Idaho is viewed and undertaken a hell of a lot differently than one in Phoenix or Pittsburgh.

Just to follow up on this point; think about it....In Idaho or Texas or Wyoming or someplace like that, if you insult a man's wife the fists will be flying within seconds...maybe a minute at most. Now in Pittsburgh it takes a good half hour for anyone to start throwing hooks 'cause there's an entire cultural procedure that must be recognized. You have to:

1) establish your opponent's identity ("who the fuck are you? WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU?" Oh you don't know? Well who the fuck do you THINK you are?")

2) you have to introduce yourself ("do you know who I am? Do you know who the fuck you are dealing with?")

3) you must establish your credentials ("I have fucked with guys all over this nation mother fucker. I've fucked with guys in Brooklyn, New Jersey, Miami...I've been around mother fucker")

4) you must present your plan of attack ("do you know what the fuck I'm going to do you? Do you have any fucking idea what the fuck I'm gonna do to you? I'm gonna jam that cue stick straight up your ass, mother fucker")

5) you must check to ensure your opponent has full understanding ("have you fucking figured this out mother fucker? Have you got it through your fucking head how bad you are gonna get fucked up?")

.......you know....it takes forever. In Idaho it's really quick. "Hey your wife's a bitch"...KAPOW!!!!!

There must be some sort of physical act the precedes it as well like strong act of finger pointing a middle finger salute or the ever popular grabbing of the private area which by the way I have never understood since women don't grab their breast and shake it at you to show anger but I digress...lol

Rosanne Barr did it when she sang the national anthem. Grabbed her crotch and spit.

One time I saw a girl in the library reading and every couple minutes she would reach into her pants and finger herself. I asked her to stop masturbating and she said she wasn't. She was wetting her finger so she could turn the page.

 

[TrinityPower]

Just to follow up on this point; think about it....In Idaho or Texas or Wyoming or someplace like that, if you insult a man's wife the fists will be flying within seconds...maybe a minute at most. Now in Pittsburgh it takes a good half hour for anyone to start throwing hooks 'cause there's an entire cultural procedure that must be recognized. You have to:

1) establish your opponent's identity ("who the fuck are you? WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU?" Oh you don't know? Well who the fuck do you THINK you are?")

2) you have to introduce yourself ("do you know who I am? Do you know who the fuck you are dealing with?")

3) you must establish your credentials ("I have fucked with guys all over this nation mother fucker. I've fucked with guys in Brooklyn, New Jersey, Miami...I've been around mother fucker")

4) you must present your plan of attack ("do you know what the fuck I'm going to do you? Do you have any fucking idea what the fuck I'm gonna do to you? I'm gonna jam that cue stick straight up your ass, mother fucker")

5) you must check to ensure your opponent has full understanding ("have you fucking figured this out mother fucker? Have you got it through your fucking head how bad you are gonna get fucked up?")

.......you know....it takes forever. In Idaho it's really quick. "Hey your wife's a bitch"...KAPOW!!!!!

There must be some sort of physical act the precedes it as well like strong act of finger pointing a middle finger salute or the ever popular grabbing of the private area which by the way I have never understood since women don't grab their breast and shake it at you to show anger but I digress...lol

Rosanne Barr did it when she sang the national anthem. Grabbed her crotch and spit.

One time I saw a girl in the library reading and every couple minutes she would reach into her pants and finger herself. I asked her to stop masturbating and she said she wasn't. She was wetting her finger so she could turn the page.

Be thankful she was not reaching into the back of her pants

 

[koshergrl]

What a nauseating thread.