CDZ Is Police Misconduct and Child Abuse-Neglect Intertwined?

[AveryJarhman]

(Brooklyn's Marcy Houses - undated photo)

Hello. After spending twelve years in the 80s-90s providing police services to the Brooklyn community Shawn Jay Z Carter raps about using his semi-auto "Mack Milli' to dominate and cause fear to peaceful people for the purpose of protecting his gang's 24/7 drug operation, it was fear for my personal safety that finally drove me from a community, that because I spent so much time there, I considered my second home.

Sadly, I have few doubts that some Americans fail to perceive or willfully ignore some reasons for why at times, police are less than professional or act in a manner inconsistent with their scope of employment.

Not that I believe police acting outside the scope of their employment is acceptable, I just understand that witnessing on a daily basis - violence, people's lack of respect for each other as well as our laws, sadness, children emotionally scarred by their immature single-moms; doomed to a life of struggle and hardships - can have detrimental effects on many people born or imbued with a sense of sympathy, empathy and respect for others.

Some officers recognize they are burnt, they no longer feel a desire to serve a community that has diminished their faith in the goodness of human kind, a community that constantly has them in self-protection mode whenever they are working in the community, or even commuting to and from the community in their private cars.

These officers intelligently seek a transfer to a more stable community, while others remain, mostly because of established friendships with colleagues, allowing and in some cases not realizing the emotional pain they experience from witnessing human suffering on a daily basis is insidiously eating away at them, and at times affecting their professional conduct and in some cases their emotional well being.

During the hiring process we subject police candidates to psychological exams to insure they are normal stable people. Then we place these normal, stable people into an environment they are totally unaccustomed to, often dangerous environments, and we expect them to remain normal people when they are constantly and justifiably told by their supervisors to be safe, while reading crime reports that indicate they are not safe.

Sure, these officers are not in a war or battle, yet the chances for stumbling upon a gunfight or being attacked for no reason are greater in a community with a general flavor for lawlessness.

One sunny afternoon I was at the scene of a shooting, surrounded by dozens of civilians and a dozen or more cops, when a second person was shot no more than one hundred yards away. Tell me that would not give you goosebumps.

This anecdote is a tip of the iceberg.

One afternoon I'm on my way home stopped at a traffic light when gunfire erupts, three men carrying handguns run by me, enter a waiting town car.

Risking my safety I follow in my pvt car attempting to learn more about the suspects as they unobtrusively leave the scene. They stop at a house about ten blocks away, me not being a hero willing to confront three armed men with my two-inch six shot revolver, spend several minutes trying to locate a working payphone to report my observations.

Heading back to the scene I learn the three people shot, their neighbors who at the time of the shooting were hanging on their front stoops, provided the police with NO information about the shooting or the shooters, I was the only witness to come forward, and it isn't even my community.

While at the scene, the same town car I observed picking up the shooters several minutes earlier, arrives back on the scene operated by a man we detained and soon learned was wanted for a totally unrelated shooting that occurred a few weeks earlier.

Driving home that night I asked myself, "Why do I do this? Five, sometimes six days a week making this long drive, placing my safety at risk for people who either hate me, or people justifiably afraid and equally fearful of the people who hate me."

A few days later I went to my CO and requested a transfer, advising him, "Lou, I've had enough of the nonsense, it's time for me to go."

Within a week he hooked me up with a transfer to a more stable community, closer to home. A community where fewer people viewed me as the enemy, and many actually openly appreciated the police, sharing words of appreciation often harshly frowned upon by many in the Brooklyn community I was forced to abandon, due to my level of fear that gradually built up and intensified over a period of nearly twelve years.

I knew when I had enough of the emotional turmoil I experienced from witnessing mayhem and violence on a daily basis. I made the intelligent choice to protect my emotional well being by leaving this Brooklyn community which was the cause for my fear and anxiety.

Unfortunately some cops ignore the signs of stress and anxiety, indicating that it is time for a change of venue, instead choosing to remain in their second homes where they have built friendships and bonds.

I fear nothing will change until Americans honestly recognize that bringing children into our world without first acquiring the skills to properly love and nurture a child, or having the skills or means to independently provide for a child's upbringing, may result in a child growing up filled with anger and frustrations, needing to vent those emotions, sadly, not in a constructive manner.

This is a social/human behavioral problem I've witnessed happening for decades in some/many American communities.

Unfortunately for police, they are tasked with coping with the anger and frustrations of children irresponsibly introduced to our world by people who had no socially accepted right making babies before acquiring the skills, PATIENCE and means to provide their developing newborns, infants, toddlers, children and teens with a safe, fairly happy American kid childhood.

Sadly, Baltimore Mom of The Year is a perfect example of a immature teen girl irresponsibly building a family that she subjected to a early life of pain and struggle.

Ms. Toya Graham, is not alone. She is only one of countless teen girls and women who in my opinion are responsible for populating our prisons with depressed, angry, frustrated, unpredictable, sometimes suicidal teens *(NY Times May 18, 2015 - Rise in Suicide by Black Children Surprises Researchers)* filled with resentment for being introduced to a life of pain, though unwilling to blame their moms and or dads for making selfish choices that negatively impacted the quality of their young lives.

To be clear, I am not suggesting Child Abuse and Neglect are the only factors for police acting outside the scope of their employment.

However, I honestly believe that reducing Child Abuse and Neglect will not only reduce the number of African American children committing suicide, reducing Childhood Abuse and Neglect will result with fairly happy children maturing into fairly happy teens and adults who will find more constructive activities to pursue, rather than anti-social activities that emotionally and/or physically harm their peaceful neighbors and police who try to protect peaceful people from harm.

The question all concerned, compassionate Americans should seriously be asking ourselves, our elected, civil, social, community and religious leaders is, what real, substantial changes in our society's attitude and laws need to occur to prevent abuse that often causes young kids to mature into depressed, frustrated, angry teens and adults as a result of experiencing the *emotional and/or physical trauma of an abusive childhood?*

Black *(Children's)* Lives Matter; Take Pride In Parenting; *End Our National Epidemic of Child Abuse and Neglect*; End Community Violence, Police Fear & Educator's Frustrations

 

[Fishlore]

Cops and soldiers are government employees who responsibility it is to exercise the state's monopoly on violence. It is not an easy job and we owe a debt of gratitude to those who do the job well, a debt which all too often is not fully repaid.

As citizens we must not let our emotional response to the services of the police or the military blind us to the sad reality that both cops and soldiers all too often serve as the instrument social injustice and national aggression. These enforcers of wrong government policy don't make that policy but they are the rubber that meets the road.

Just as the enforcers don't create the unjust policies, neither can they cure them. Cops' and soldiers' first duty is to obey orders. Questioning those orders is never encouraged and can be a big mistake. We should do whatever works to free our society of bad cops and bad soldiers but we must recognize that tweaking the training of our paid enforcers is not going to cure us of our sins. The heart of the problem isn't the enforcers, it is us.

 

[320 Years of History]

I think they are intertwined insofar as abused kids who later become cops will misconduct themselves. I think those are the cops who get on a "power trip" once they acquire a shield and gun.

 

[AveryJarhman]

The heart of the problem isn't the enforcers, it is us.

Hi, Fishlore, thank you for publishing an intelligent reply.

 

[320 Years of History]

Cops and soldiers are government employees who responsibility it is to exercise the state's monopoly on violence. It is not an easy job and we owe a debt of gratitude to those who do the job well, a debt which all too often is not fully repaid.

As citizens we must not let our emotional response to the services of the police or the military blind us to the sad reality that both cops and soldiers all too often serve as the instrument social injustice and national aggression. These enforcers of wrong government policy don't make that policy but they are the rubber that meets the road.

Just as the enforcers don't create the unjust policies, neither can they cure them. Cops' and soldiers' first duty is to obey orders. Questioning those orders is never encouraged and can be a big mistake. We should do whatever works to free our society of bad cops and bad soldiers but we must recognize that tweaking the training of our paid enforcers is not going to cure us of our sins. The heart of the problem isn't the enforcers, it is us.

I generally agree with your comments, but I don't feel your remark about following orders fairly presents whether those personnel, particularly members of the U.S. military, are encouraged to follow orders. After all, the oath taken upon joining the armed forces is:

I,____________, do solemnly swear (or affirm) that I will support and defend the Constitution of the United States against all enemies, foreign and domestic; that I will bear true faith and allegiance to the same; and that I will obey the orders of the President of the United States and the orders of the officers appointed over me, according to the regulations and the Uniform Code of Military Justice.​

Yes, they must obey orders, but it is incumbent upon military personnel to consider whether the orders they are given are lawful and disregard those orders that they determine are not. "Lawful" and "agree with" aren't the same things, and that's so whether one is in the military or not. Now whether or not the military makes available to its personnel the tools/information necessary to determine (or build up awareness of) what is and is not legal is something I don't know happens or doesn't happen.

 

[Fishlore]

Cops and soldiers are government employees who responsibility it is to exercise the state's monopoly on violence. It is not an easy job and we owe a debt of gratitude to those who do the job well, a debt which all too often is not fully repaid.

As citizens we must not let our emotional response to the services of the police or the military blind us to the sad reality that both cops and soldiers all too often serve as the instrument social injustice and national aggression. These enforcers of wrong government policy don't make that policy but they are the rubber that meets the road.

Just as the enforcers don't create the unjust policies, neither can they cure them. Cops' and soldiers' first duty is to obey orders. Questioning those orders is never encouraged and can be a big mistake. We should do whatever works to free our society of bad cops and bad soldiers but we must recognize that tweaking the training of our paid enforcers is not going to cure us of our sins. The heart of the problem isn't the enforcers, it is us.

I generally agree with your comments, but I don't feel your remark about following orders fairly presents whether those personnel, particularly members of the U.S. military, are encouraged to follow orders. After all, the oath taken upon joining the armed forces is:

I,____________, do solemnly swear (or affirm) that I will support and defend the Constitution of the United States against all enemies, foreign and domestic; that I will bear true faith and allegiance to the same; and that I will obey the orders of the President of the United States and the orders of the officers appointed over me, according to the regulations and the Uniform Code of Military Justice.​

Yes, they must obey orders, but it is incumbent upon military personnel to consider whether the orders they are given are lawful and disregard those orders that they determine are not. "Lawful" and "agree with" aren't the same things, and that's so whether one is in the military or not. Now whether or not the military makes available to its personnel the tools/information necessary to determine (or build up awareness of) what is and is not legal is something I don't know happens or doesn't happen.

Your point about unlawful orders is a good one but it is largely theoretical in practice. Sure, if some young Second Lieutenant orders the platoon to storm into the local supermarket and kill everyone inside, he is going to be taken for medical attention by a couple of sergeants, but anything less obvious may be a different story. Think of My Lai or Abu Ghraib. From the first day, boot camp doesn't do much to encourage independent thinking about orders.

Early in my ROTC career I was reprimanded by my DI. " But, I thought ..." I started to say. "You thought?" he roared, "who ordered you to think?" Those lessons stay with you.

 

[320 Years of History]

Your point about unlawful orders is a good one but it is largely theoretical in practice. Sure, if some young Second Lieutenant orders the platoon to storm into the local supermarket and kill everyone inside, he is going to be taken for medical attention by a couple of sergeants, but anything less obvious may be a different story. Think of My Lai or Abu Ghraib. From the first day, boot camp doesn't do much to encourage independent thinking about orders.

Early in my ROTC career I was reprimanded by my DI. " But, I thought ..." I started to say. "You thought?" he roared, "who ordered you to think?" Those lessons stay with you.

I get what you mean; moreover, I never received a military commission, so I don't have your firsthand experience. It's clear to me from having worked with military officers (they were active duty; I was a consultant) -- some combat commanders, some business operations, some attorneys -- that thinking is among the things they are expected to do, and do well. Why you got that sort of response from your DI I cannot say.

I don't know at what point thinking becomes expected, but I'm surprised that the skills required to do so well aren't among the things taught and allowed to be exercised as early as one's ROTC experience. I do know that thinking is among the skills whereof the longer one waits to begin doing it, the longer it'll take to be good at doing it.

 

[Fishlore]

Your point about unlawful orders is a good one but it is largely theoretical in practice. Sure, if some young Second Lieutenant orders the platoon to storm into the local supermarket and kill everyone inside, he is going to be taken for medical attention by a couple of sergeants, but anything less obvious may be a different story. Think of My Lai or Abu Ghraib. From the first day, boot camp doesn't do much to encourage independent thinking about orders.

Early in my ROTC career I was reprimanded by my DI. " But, I thought ..." I started to say. "You thought?" he roared, "who ordered you to think?" Those lessons stay with you.

I get what you mean; moreover, I never received a military commission, so I don't have your firsthand experience. It's clear to me from having worked with military officers (they were active duty; I was a consultant) -- some combat commanders, some business operations, some attorneys -- that thinking is among the things they are expected to do, and do well. Why you got that sort of response from your DI I cannot say.

I don't know at what point thinking becomes expected, but I'm surprised that the skills required to do so well aren't among the things taught and allowed to be exercised as early as one's ROTC experience. I do know that thinking is among the skills whereof the longer one waits to begin doing it, the longer it'll take to be good at doing it.

ROTC at an Ivy League university had and still has ample room for serious thinking and scholarship. The drill field is not one of the places where thinking or scholarship take place.

The reason is brutally simple and can be understood without military experience by anyone who has enjoyed the game of football. There is need for thoughtful analysis on the bench. There is benefit in hearing views in the huddle, but once the ball is snapped, the only thing in the player's mind should be his job and how to do it best.

There are times when every cell in your brain screams, "NO! I don't want to die!" At times like those, thinking about the legitimacy of the order cannot be tolerated. When the only alternatives are obey or run away, discipline is vital, analysis is not. It is brutal and decidedly undemocratic. ROTC taught me that "in the U.S. Navy, we protect democracy, we do not practice it." The military is not a model for our society.

 

[320 Years of History]

ROTC at an Ivy League university had and still has ample room for serious thinking and scholarship. The drill field is not one of the places where thinking or scholarship take place.

The reason is brutally simple and can be understood without military experience by anyone who has enjoyed the game of football. There is need for thoughtful analysis on the bench. There is benefit in hearing views in the huddle, but once the ball is snapped, the only thing in the player's mind should be his job and how to do it best.

There are times when every cell in your brain screams, "NO! I don't want to die!" At times like those, thinking about the legitimacy of the order cannot be tolerated. When the only alternatives are obey or run away, discipline is vital, analysis is not. It is brutal and decidedly undemocratic. ROTC taught me that "in the U.S. Navy, we protect democracy, we do not practice it." The military is not a model for our society.

No question there. I would sure hope there's "ample room...for thinking" at college; that's the key reason for one's being there. LOL

Everything has an appropriate time and place.

 

[jwoodie]

OK, there are bad people of every stripe, color and uniform out there. A murder is a murder, no matter who commits it. There, does that make you feel better? How about more talk regarding social justice, institutional racism, diversity training, blah, blah, blah... Does that solve the problem? NO

The reality is that we now have legions of young Black thugs who taunt police with semi-criminal behavior every chance they get just to see what might happen. Taking risks is part of male adolescent behavior, but when it is combined with social endorsement, the results are often deadly.

Black Lives Matter is simply the latest and greatest snake oil being sold to young Blacks as a cure for their lack of self worth, which stems from the dysfunctional subculture in which they are raised. Regardless of the cause, the cure must begin at home.

 

[Disir]

(Brooklyn's Marcy Houses - undated photo)

Hello. After spending twelve years in the 80s-90s providing police services to the Brooklyn community Shawn Jay Z Carter raps about using his semi-auto "Mack Milli' to dominate and cause fear to peaceful people for the purpose of protecting his gang's 24/7 drug operation, it was fear for my personal safety that finally drove me from a community, that because I spent so much time there, I considered my second home.

Sadly, I have few doubts that some Americans fail to perceive or willfully ignore some reasons for why at times, police are less than professional or act in a manner inconsistent with their scope of employment.

Not that I believe police acting outside the scope of their employment is acceptable, I just understand that witnessing on a daily basis - violence, people's lack of respect for each other as well as our laws, sadness, children emotionally scarred by their immature single-moms; doomed to a life of struggle and hardships - can have detrimental effects on many people born or imbued with a sense of sympathy, empathy and respect for others.

Some officers recognize they are burnt, they no longer feel a desire to serve a community that has diminished their faith in the goodness of human kind, a community that constantly has them in self-protection mode whenever they are working in the community, or even commuting to and from the community in their private cars.

These officers intelligently seek a transfer to a more stable community, while others remain, mostly because of established friendships with colleagues, allowing and in some cases not realizing the emotional pain they experience from witnessing human suffering on a daily basis is insidiously eating away at them, and at times affecting their professional conduct and in some cases their emotional well being.

During the hiring process we subject police candidates to psychological exams to insure they are normal stable people. Then we place these normal, stable people into an environment they are totally unaccustomed to, often dangerous environments, and we expect them to remain normal people when they are constantly and justifiably told by their supervisors to be safe, while reading crime reports that indicate they are not safe.

Sure, these officers are not in a war or battle, yet the chances for stumbling upon a gunfight or being attacked for no reason are greater in a community with a general flavor for lawlessness.

One sunny afternoon I was at the scene of a shooting, surrounded by dozens of civilians and a dozen or more cops, when a second person was shot no more than one hundred yards away. Tell me that would not give you goosebumps.

This anecdote is a tip of the iceberg.

One afternoon I'm on my way home stopped at a traffic light when gunfire erupts, three men carrying handguns run by me, enter a waiting town car.

Risking my safety I follow in my pvt car attempting to learn more about the suspects as they unobtrusively leave the scene. They stop at a house about ten blocks away, me not being a hero willing to confront three armed men with my two-inch six shot revolver, spend several minutes trying to locate a working payphone to report my observations.

Heading back to the scene I learn the three people shot, their neighbors who at the time of the shooting were hanging on their front stoops, provided the police with NO information about the shooting or the shooters, I was the only witness to come forward, and it isn't even my community.

While at the scene, the same town car I observed picking up the shooters several minutes earlier, arrives back on the scene operated by a man we detained and soon learned was wanted for a totally unrelated shooting that occurred a few weeks earlier.

Driving home that night I asked myself, "Why do I do this? Five, sometimes six days a week making this long drive, placing my safety at risk for people who either hate me, or people justifiably afraid and equally fearful of the people who hate me."

A few days later I went to my CO and requested a transfer, advising him, "Lou, I've had enough of the nonsense, it's time for me to go."

Within a week he hooked me up with a transfer to a more stable community, closer to home. A community where fewer people viewed me as the enemy, and many actually openly appreciated the police, sharing words of appreciation often harshly frowned upon by many in the Brooklyn community I was forced to abandon, due to my level of fear that gradually built up and intensified over a period of nearly twelve years.

I knew when I had enough of the emotional turmoil I experienced from witnessing mayhem and violence on a daily basis. I made the intelligent choice to protect my emotional well being by leaving this Brooklyn community which was the cause for my fear and anxiety.

Unfortunately some cops ignore the signs of stress and anxiety, indicating that it is time for a change of venue, instead choosing to remain in their second homes where they have built friendships and bonds.

I fear nothing will change until Americans honestly recognize that bringing children into our world without first acquiring the skills to properly love and nurture a child, or having the skills or means to independently provide for a child's upbringing, may result in a child growing up filled with anger and frustrations, needing to vent those emotions, sadly, not in a constructive manner.

This is a social/human behavioral problem I've witnessed happening for decades in some/many American communities.

Unfortunately for police, they are tasked with coping with the anger and frustrations of children irresponsibly introduced to our world by people who had no socially accepted right making babies before acquiring the skills, PATIENCE and means to provide their developing newborns, infants, toddlers, children and teens with a safe, fairly happy American kid childhood.

Sadly, Baltimore Mom of The Year is a perfect example of a immature teen girl irresponsibly building a family that she subjected to a early life of pain and struggle.

Ms. Toya Graham, is not alone. She is only one of countless teen girls and women who in my opinion are responsible for populating our prisons with depressed, angry, frustrated, unpredictable, sometimes suicidal teens *(NY Times May 18, 2015 - Rise in Suicide by Black Children Surprises Researchers)* filled with resentment for being introduced to a life of pain, though unwilling to blame their moms and or dads for making selfish choices that negatively impacted the quality of their young lives.

To be clear, I am not suggesting Child Abuse and Neglect are the only factors for police acting outside the scope of their employment.

However, I honestly believe that reducing Child Abuse and Neglect will not only reduce the number of African American children committing suicide, reducing Childhood Abuse and Neglect will result with fairly happy children maturing into fairly happy teens and adults who will find more constructive activities to pursue, rather than anti-social activities that emotionally and/or physically harm their peaceful neighbors and police who try to protect peaceful people from harm.

The question all concerned, compassionate Americans should seriously be asking ourselves, our elected, civil, social, community and religious leaders is, what real, substantial changes in our society's attitude and laws need to occur to prevent abuse that often causes young kids to mature into depressed, frustrated, angry teens and adults as a result of experiencing the *emotional and/or physical trauma of an abusive childhood?*

Black *(Children's)* Lives Matter; Take Pride In Parenting; *End Our National Epidemic of Child Abuse and Neglect*; End Community Violence, Police Fear & Educator's Frustrations

What law do you want or what is it specifically that you want the government to do?

 

[AveryJarhman]

What law do you want or what is it specifically that you want the government to do?

Hello D. This is an issue that needs to be addressed by American people urging elected and community leaders to speak up loudly about moms depriving their kids of a safe, fairly happy childhood.

Victims of Child Abuse and Neglect like Tavis Smiley, Kendrick Lamar, Curtis Jackson, Shawn Carter, Dwayne Carter need to step up to the plate, honestly speaking about how their lives were impacted by the immature desicions their moms made for them, their brothers and sisters.

In this post, Fox's Brian Kilmeade Asks Black Co-host If She Makes Kool-Aid | Page 62 | US Message Board - Political Discussion Forum, I shared some other thoughts for preventing children from maturing into depressed, angry, frusrated teens and adults who become fans of music performers characterizing our moms, sisters, grandmas, daughters, aunts and nieces as less than human bitches and whores unworthy of respect.

Peace.

 

[Elvis Obama]

Black Lives Matter is simply the latest and greatest snake oil being sold to young Blacks as a cure for their lack of self worth, which stems from the dysfunctional subculture in which they are raised. Regardless of the cause, the cure must begin at home.

I don't think the cure begins at home, I think it ends there. Expecting the children of bad parents to be good is pointless. Unless an outside force makes bad parents better we will never succeed in breaking the cycle of poverty.

 

[Disir]

What law do you want or what is it specifically that you want the government to do?

Hello D. This is an issue that needs to be addressed by American people urging elected and community leaders to speak up loudly about moms depriving their kids of a safe, fairly happy childhood.

Victims of Child Abuse and Neglect like Tavis Smiley, Kendrick Lamar, Curtis Jackson, Shawn Carter, Dwayne Carter need to step up to the plate, honestly speaking about how their lives were impacted by the immature desicions their moms made for them, their brothers and sisters.

In this post, Fox's Brian Kilmeade Asks Black Co-host If She Makes Kool-Aid | Page 62 | US Message Board - Political Discussion Forum, I shared some other thoughts for preventing children from maturing into depressed, angry, frusrated teens and adults who become fans of music performers characterizing our moms, sisters, grandmas, daughters, aunts and nieces as less than human bitches and whores unworthy of respect.

Peace.

Tavis Smiley suffered abuse from the Step-father not the mother. Yet, you don't want to hold the Step-father accountable. It was, in fact, a two parent household.

Dwayne Carter witnessed his biological father beat his mother. Note that his mother was married to his father. She was pressured into marrying the father. Dwayne has four children with four different women.

Shawn Carter's mother was married to his father for 13 years and had four children. She had a stable job. She is all about personal responsibility and work ethic. Dad abandoned the family.

I listened to the rant on the video...if that is you then here is what I took away from that.
Yeah. I see it differently. Are there young girls and women that are completely irresponsible? Yep. Sometimes you are dealing with women that have no mental deficiencies and sometimes you are. Unless you have personal knowledge then you're just kind of spinning the wheels here. You're allegedly an ex cop and you know damn well that if you don't have a psych eval that you are taking a gamble here.

So, back to the mom of year issue. Ms. Graham had a job and lost it due to a back injury. Something you neglected to point out in your diatribe. But notice that in her history the kids were placed with her sister and none of the fathers. This very young girl that lost her mother probably did not have any way of dealing with the grief. Dad didn't control it. All of the fathers were taken to court to provide child support. May have been forced into it. So........none of the fathers stepped up and said, "Let me take my kid." She busted her ass to comply to get them back. Lots don't. And dear brother is the one that brought all of this up because......he didn't get his cut of fame?

It's almost funny that you would comment on what she was wearing. Had she rolled up on her son weighing 350 lbs in spandex pants and a tshirt with her hair all jacked up then you would have been commenting on that too and saying .......how stereotypical.

You know girls hit a depression starting at the age of 9 because society tells them to be smart but not too smart, be sexy but not too sexy, be sweet, be kind, be strong but weak enough to need someone else to wear the pants in the family. Jumping through hoops.

In prison men and women are almost equal. When was the last time that you heard of a man having to work his ass off to get his kids back when he is released. Women have to start working solo months before they are released because those services aren't in play and have to have a house with a room for each kid and a job usually within 6 months after release. When the hell were those demands placed on a father?

When women screw up they have to pay emotionally for the rest of their lives. When men screw up they can go and give lectures as to how they overcame whatever the hell their source of pain happened to be.

Yep, there are women and men that play hysterical to the camera or the crowd. Agree with that. Meet them all the time. If they are hysterical then they can't manage to answer questions. Convenient. Even better---drama queens is an equal opportunity role. That wasn't the case initially.

She wanted her kid off the street and out of the mayhem because she wanted him alive. The rest came later. Ego busted? Sure. Emasculated? No.

There is no plot to emasculate men. Not necessary. These guys do it all by themselves. Refusing to take control of a situation and then having a knipshit and criticizing when someone else does. Nothing like a bunch of deflective passive aggressive crap. The government isn't trying to control the community through women. At any time men could have stepped in at any point of people's lives and chose not to. It's just way easier not to take responsibility and then point out all of the problems when someone else does. Keep 'em jumping through hoops.

 

[AveryJarhman]

Tavis Smiley suffered abuse from the Step-father not the mother. Yet, you don't want to hold the Step-father accountable. It was, in fact, a two parent household.

Hello, Disir.

Tavis's mom was a single eighteen-yr-old woman when she began building her family and subsequently married an abusive, emotionally disturbed paternal figure who emotionally and physically tortured her children.

Dwayne Carter witnessed his biological father beat his mother. Note that his mother was married to his father. She was pressured into marrying the father. Dwayne has four children with four different women.

Dwayne Lil Wayne Carter was nine-yrs-old when he began rapping. By the time he was twelve he was signed to a record label, rapping about gun violence, selling drugs to his neighbors and characterizing women as bitches and whores.

B.G. (Ft. Lil Wayne & Mr. Ivan) – True Story

Shawn Carter's mother was married to his father for 13 years and had four children. She had a stable job. She is all about personal responsibility and work ethic. Dad abandoned the family.

Shawn Jay Z Carter was 12-yrs-old when he shot his older substance abusing older brother for stealing from a family member.

Jay-Z: I shot my brother at age 12

By the time Shawn was in his mid-teens these are the anti-social activities he was involved in.

'Jay Z' Raps About Child Abuse, The Fear and Harm He Caused to Peaceful People

I personally witnessed the individual and community harming anti-social activities that Shawn raps about, though at the time I was unaware Shawn was specifically responsible for...it was not until his raps became popular that I realized he and his crew of abused/neglected young violent felons were responsible for much of the pain I witnessed untold numbers of his peaceful neighbors suffer due to his mom failing to supervise him.

I listened to the rant on the video...if that is you then here is what I took away from that.

Yeah. I see it differently. Are there young girls and women that are completely irresponsible? Yep. Sometimes you are dealing with women that have no mental deficiencies and sometimes you are. Unless you have personal knowledge then you're just kind of spinning the wheels here. You're allegedly an ex cop and you know damn well that if you don't have a psych eval that you are taking a gamble here.

I have no clue what video you are referring to.

So, back to the mom of year issue. Ms. Graham had a job and lost it due to a back injury. Something you neglected to point out in your diatribe. But notice that in her history the kids were placed with her sister and none of the fathers. This very young girl that lost her mother probably did not have any way of dealing with the grief. Dad didn't control it. All of the fathers were taken to court to provide child support. May have been forced into it. So........none of the fathers stepped up and said, "Let me take my kid." She busted her ass to comply to get them back. Lots don't. And dear brother is the one that brought all of this up because......he didn't get his cut of fame?

It's almost funny that you would comment on what she was wearing. Had she rolled up on her son weighing 350 lbs in spandex pants and a tshirt with her hair all jacked up then you would have been commenting on that too and saying .......how stereotypical.

Disir, you wrote, "It's almost funny that you would comment on what she was wearing..."

Where did I comment about Toya Graham's clothing or physical appearance? I believe you are mistaken about me commenting on Ms. Graham's appearance.

Exclusive: Why America's 'mom of the year' chased son home from riots

I cited BMoTY Toya Graham as ONE example of a female making poor choices for the well being of her children.

I'll let the people in these video presentations speak for me, sharing their perceptions of the small population of African American females who are causing problems and issues for the much larger peaceful population of African Americans who simply want to enjoy and experience their vision of Life, Liberty, (Love) and the Pursuit of Happiness.

Video Archive - American Men & Women Sharing Thoughts About Some African American Women & Moms

You know girls hit a depression starting at the age of 9 because society tells them to be smart but not too smart, be sexy but not too sexy, be sweet, be kind, be strong but weak enough to need someone else to wear the pants in the family. Jumping through hoops.

Disir, our entire society is filled with hypocrisy and mixed messages. Which makes it even more important for MATERNAL CAREGIVERS from all communities to be more responsible in raising and nurturing society's children.

In prison men and women are almost equal. When was the last time that you heard of a man having to work his ass off to get his kids back when he is released. Women have to start working solo months before they are released because those services aren't in play and have to have a house with a room for each kid and a job usually within 6 months after release. When the hell were those demands placed on a father?

Disir, since ancient times females have been the PRIMARY caregivers for most every society's children. Moms are responsible for socializing the children they give life to. In my mind this makes females who choose to create life, primarily responsible for nurturing and providing guidance to the life they create.

Disir, while I do not agree with this man's style for communicating his thoughts, concerns and pain, I agree with David Carroll about the African proverb he based this presentation on:

At any time men could have stepped in at any point of people's lives and chose not to. It's just way easier not to take responsibility and then point out all of the problems when someone else does. Keep 'em jumping through hoops.

Disir, in my opinion and experience a significant number of African American men have been since birth, emotionally scarred by the immature single moms who introduced them to life.

Brooklyn's Boom-Box Mom; Sad Case of Child Abuse & Maltreatment

Witnessing A Severely Depressed Teen, Reveal He Is A Victim of Child Abuse/Neglect

Brooklyn, NY Newborn Raised To Be A "Baddd Boy"

Brooklyn, NY Newborn Raised To Be A "Baddd Boy"

Yes, men do have a responsibility to the children they help create.

However I believe women have the final say about when they are emotionally prepared to take on the 24/7 challenges of raising a nurturing a child who experiences a safe, fairly happy American kid childhood with Safe Streets to travel and play on.

Peace.

 

[candycorn]

No. I don't think so.

Power goes to some persons's heads and it doesn't others.

Google and learn from "The Stanford Prison Experiment". Just to encapsulate (and I am tailoring the response to the question--there is a lot more character to the experiment); I think it was 18 men were recruited from the Stanford student body. The basement of the psyc building was turned into a jail. Once they had 18 volunteers who could commit to the time parameters of the experiment, they took 9 at random and made them guards and took another 9 and made them inmates. The guards got uniforms and sunglasses (even though there was no light) and the inmates got a smock to wear, a chain locked around their ankle, and a cap to wear. This stripped away their individuality.

I think the time parameter was two weeks to start with. They had to suspend it after 6 days because the guards became too maniacal with power. Some of the guards volunteered to work extra shifts even though there was no extra pay involved. The inmates were frequently harassed as you can see in this 2 minute video:



The point is that the proctors had no idea who was being assigned to guard duty and no idea who was being assigned to inmate duty. No known pre-dispositions. Power seemed to go to everyone's head just as hopelessness went to all of the inmate's heads. To a degree. Some took it to an extreme and others did not.

 

[Asclepias]

(Brooklyn's Marcy Houses - undated photo)

Hello. After spending twelve years in the 80s-90s providing police services to the Brooklyn community Shawn Jay Z Carter raps about using his semi-auto "Mack Milli' to dominate and cause fear to peaceful people for the purpose of protecting his gang's 24/7 drug operation, it was fear for my personal safety that finally drove me from a community, that because I spent so much time there, I considered my second home.

Sadly, I have few doubts that some Americans fail to perceive or willfully ignore some reasons for why at times, police are less than professional or act in a manner inconsistent with their scope of employment.

Not that I believe police acting outside the scope of their employment is acceptable, I just understand that witnessing on a daily basis - violence, people's lack of respect for each other as well as our laws, sadness, children emotionally scarred by their immature single-moms; doomed to a life of struggle and hardships - can have detrimental effects on many people born or imbued with a sense of sympathy, empathy and respect for others.

Some officers recognize they are burnt, they no longer feel a desire to serve a community that has diminished their faith in the goodness of human kind, a community that constantly has them in self-protection mode whenever they are working in the community, or even commuting to and from the community in their private cars.

These officers intelligently seek a transfer to a more stable community, while others remain, mostly because of established friendships with colleagues, allowing and in some cases not realizing the emotional pain they experience from witnessing human suffering on a daily basis is insidiously eating away at them, and at times affecting their professional conduct and in some cases their emotional well being.

During the hiring process we subject police candidates to psychological exams to insure they are normal stable people. Then we place these normal, stable people into an environment they are totally unaccustomed to, often dangerous environments, and we expect them to remain normal people when they are constantly and justifiably told by their supervisors to be safe, while reading crime reports that indicate they are not safe.

Sure, these officers are not in a war or battle, yet the chances for stumbling upon a gunfight or being attacked for no reason are greater in a community with a general flavor for lawlessness.

One sunny afternoon I was at the scene of a shooting, surrounded by dozens of civilians and a dozen or more cops, when a second person was shot no more than one hundred yards away. Tell me that would not give you goosebumps.

This anecdote is a tip of the iceberg.

One afternoon I'm on my way home stopped at a traffic light when gunfire erupts, three men carrying handguns run by me, enter a waiting town car.

Risking my safety I follow in my pvt car attempting to learn more about the suspects as they unobtrusively leave the scene. They stop at a house about ten blocks away, me not being a hero willing to confront three armed men with my two-inch six shot revolver, spend several minutes trying to locate a working payphone to report my observations.

Heading back to the scene I learn the three people shot, their neighbors who at the time of the shooting were hanging on their front stoops, provided the police with NO information about the shooting or the shooters, I was the only witness to come forward, and it isn't even my community.

While at the scene, the same town car I observed picking up the shooters several minutes earlier, arrives back on the scene operated by a man we detained and soon learned was wanted for a totally unrelated shooting that occurred a few weeks earlier.

Driving home that night I asked myself, "Why do I do this? Five, sometimes six days a week making this long drive, placing my safety at risk for people who either hate me, or people justifiably afraid and equally fearful of the people who hate me."

A few days later I went to my CO and requested a transfer, advising him, "Lou, I've had enough of the nonsense, it's time for me to go."

Within a week he hooked me up with a transfer to a more stable community, closer to home. A community where fewer people viewed me as the enemy, and many actually openly appreciated the police, sharing words of appreciation often harshly frowned upon by many in the Brooklyn community I was forced to abandon, due to my level of fear that gradually built up and intensified over a period of nearly twelve years.

I knew when I had enough of the emotional turmoil I experienced from witnessing mayhem and violence on a daily basis. I made the intelligent choice to protect my emotional well being by leaving this Brooklyn community which was the cause for my fear and anxiety.

Unfortunately some cops ignore the signs of stress and anxiety, indicating that it is time for a change of venue, instead choosing to remain in their second homes where they have built friendships and bonds.

I fear nothing will change until Americans honestly recognize that bringing children into our world without first acquiring the skills to properly love and nurture a child, or having the skills or means to independently provide for a child's upbringing, may result in a child growing up filled with anger and frustrations, needing to vent those emotions, sadly, not in a constructive manner.

This is a social/human behavioral problem I've witnessed happening for decades in some/many American communities.

Unfortunately for police, they are tasked with coping with the anger and frustrations of children irresponsibly introduced to our world by people who had no socially accepted right making babies before acquiring the skills, PATIENCE and means to provide their developing newborns, infants, toddlers, children and teens with a safe, fairly happy American kid childhood.

Sadly, Baltimore Mom of The Year is a perfect example of a immature teen girl irresponsibly building a family that she subjected to a early life of pain and struggle.

Ms. Toya Graham, is not alone. She is only one of countless teen girls and women who in my opinion are responsible for populating our prisons with depressed, angry, frustrated, unpredictable, sometimes suicidal teens *(NY Times May 18, 2015 - Rise in Suicide by Black Children Surprises Researchers)* filled with resentment for being introduced to a life of pain, though unwilling to blame their moms and or dads for making selfish choices that negatively impacted the quality of their young lives.

To be clear, I am not suggesting Child Abuse and Neglect are the only factors for police acting outside the scope of their employment.

However, I honestly believe that reducing Child Abuse and Neglect will not only reduce the number of African American children committing suicide, reducing Childhood Abuse and Neglect will result with fairly happy children maturing into fairly happy teens and adults who will find more constructive activities to pursue, rather than anti-social activities that emotionally and/or physically harm their peaceful neighbors and police who try to protect peaceful people from harm.

The question all concerned, compassionate Americans should seriously be asking ourselves, our elected, civil, social, community and religious leaders is, what real, substantial changes in our society's attitude and laws need to occur to prevent abuse that often causes young kids to mature into depressed, frustrated, angry teens and adults as a result of experiencing the *emotional and/or physical trauma of an abusive childhood?*

Black *(Children's)* Lives Matter; Take Pride In Parenting; *End Our National Epidemic of Child Abuse and Neglect*; End Community Violence, Police Fear & Educator's Frustrations

I'd have to say you have completely ignored the role of the cops as enablers and facilitators of the drug trade in areas like this. Cops frequently protect the drug dealers that pay them and take down the small fry dealers on occasion so it appears as if they are doing something. When a citizen is foolish enough to report the big drug dealer the cops that are protecting the dealer simply tell the drug dealer and the person that reported it gets a bullet for his trouble. I lived it and know a lot about the relationship.

 

[AveryJarhman]

(Brooklyn's Marcy Houses - undated photo)

Hello. After spending twelve years in the 80s-90s providing police services to the Brooklyn community Shawn Jay Z Carter raps about using his semi-auto "Mack Milli' to dominate and cause fear to peaceful people for the purpose of protecting his gang's 24/7 drug operation, it was fear for my personal safety that finally drove me from a community, that because I spent so much time there, I considered my second home.

Sadly, I have few doubts that some Americans fail to perceive or willfully ignore some reasons for why at times, police are less than professional or act in a manner inconsistent with their scope of employment.

Not that I believe police acting outside the scope of their employment is acceptable, I just understand that witnessing on a daily basis - violence, people's lack of respect for each other as well as our laws, sadness, children emotionally scarred by their immature single-moms; doomed to a life of struggle and hardships - can have detrimental effects on many people born or imbued with a sense of sympathy, empathy and respect for others.

Some officers recognize they are burnt, they no longer feel a desire to serve a community that has diminished their faith in the goodness of human kind, a community that constantly has them in self-protection mode whenever they are working in the community, or even commuting to and from the community in their private cars.

These officers intelligently seek a transfer to a more stable community, while others remain, mostly because of established friendships with colleagues, allowing and in some cases not realizing the emotional pain they experience from witnessing human suffering on a daily basis is insidiously eating away at them, and at times affecting their professional conduct and in some cases their emotional well being.

During the hiring process we subject police candidates to psychological exams to insure they are normal stable people. Then we place these normal, stable people into an environment they are totally unaccustomed to, often dangerous environments, and we expect them to remain normal people when they are constantly and justifiably told by their supervisors to be safe, while reading crime reports that indicate they are not safe.

Sure, these officers are not in a war or battle, yet the chances for stumbling upon a gunfight or being attacked for no reason are greater in a community with a general flavor for lawlessness.

One sunny afternoon I was at the scene of a shooting, surrounded by dozens of civilians and a dozen or more cops, when a second person was shot no more than one hundred yards away. Tell me that would not give you goosebumps.

This anecdote is a tip of the iceberg.

One afternoon I'm on my way home stopped at a traffic light when gunfire erupts, three men carrying handguns run by me, enter a waiting town car.

Risking my safety I follow in my pvt car attempting to learn more about the suspects as they unobtrusively leave the scene. They stop at a house about ten blocks away, me not being a hero willing to confront three armed men with my two-inch six shot revolver, spend several minutes trying to locate a working payphone to report my observations.

Heading back to the scene I learn the three people shot, their neighbors who at the time of the shooting were hanging on their front stoops, provided the police with NO information about the shooting or the shooters, I was the only witness to come forward, and it isn't even my community.

While at the scene, the same town car I observed picking up the shooters several minutes earlier, arrives back on the scene operated by a man we detained and soon learned was wanted for a totally unrelated shooting that occurred a few weeks earlier.

Driving home that night I asked myself, "Why do I do this? Five, sometimes six days a week making this long drive, placing my safety at risk for people who either hate me, or people justifiably afraid and equally fearful of the people who hate me."

A few days later I went to my CO and requested a transfer, advising him, "Lou, I've had enough of the nonsense, it's time for me to go."

Within a week he hooked me up with a transfer to a more stable community, closer to home. A community where fewer people viewed me as the enemy, and many actually openly appreciated the police, sharing words of appreciation often harshly frowned upon by many in the Brooklyn community I was forced to abandon, due to my level of fear that gradually built up and intensified over a period of nearly twelve years.

I knew when I had enough of the emotional turmoil I experienced from witnessing mayhem and violence on a daily basis. I made the intelligent choice to protect my emotional well being by leaving this Brooklyn community which was the cause for my fear and anxiety.

Unfortunately some cops ignore the signs of stress and anxiety, indicating that it is time for a change of venue, instead choosing to remain in their second homes where they have built friendships and bonds.

I fear nothing will change until Americans honestly recognize that brW6rang children into our world without first acquiring the skills to properly love and nurture a child, or having the skills or means to independently provide for a child's upbringing, may result in a child growing up filled with anger and frustrations, needing to vent those emotions, sadly, not in a constructive manner.

This is a social/human behavioral problem I've witnessed happening for decades in some/many American communities.

Unfortunately for police, they are tasked with coping with the anger and frustrations of children irresponsibly introduced to our world by people who had no socially accepted right making babies before acquiring the skills, PATIENCE and means to provide their developing newborns, infants, toddlers, children and teens with a safe, fairly happy American kid childhood.

Sadly, Baltimore Mom of The Year is a perfect example of a immature teen girl irresponsibly building a family that she subjected to a early life of pain and struggle.

Ms. Toya Graham, is not alone. She is only one of countless teen girls and women who in my opinion are responsible for populating our prisons with depressed, angry, frustrated, unpredictable, sometimes suicidal teens *(NY Times May 18, 2015 - Rise in Suicide by Black Children Surprises Researchers)* filled with resentment for being introduced to a life of pain, though unwilling to blame their moms and or dads for making selfish choices that negatively impacted the quality of their young lives.

To be clear, I am not suggesting Child Abuse and Neglect are the only factors for police acting outside the scope of their employment.

However, I honestly believe that reducing Child Abuse and Neglect will not only reduce the number of African American children committing suicide, reducing Childhood Abuse and Neglect will result with fairly happy children maturing into fairly happy teens and adults who will find more constructive activities to pursue, rather than anti-social activities that emotionally and/or physically harm their peaceful neighbors and police who try to protect peaceful people from harm.

The question all concerned, compassionate Americans should seriously be asking ourselves, our elected, civil, social, community and religious leaders is, what real, substantial changes in our society's attitude and laws need to occur to prevent abuse that often causes young kids to mature into depressed, frustrated, angry teens and adults as a result of experiencing the *emotional and/or physical trauma of an abusive childhood?*

Black *(Children's)* Lives Matter; Take Pride In Parenting; *End Our National Epidemic of Child Abuse and Neglect*; End Community Violence, Police Fear & Educator's Frustrations

I'd have to say you have completely ignored the role of the cops as enablers and facilitators of the drug trade in areas like this. Cops frequently protect the drug dealers that pay them and take down the small fry dealers on occasion so it appears as if they are doing something. When a citizen is foolish enough to report the big drug dealer the cops that are protecting the dealer simply tell the drug dealer and the person that reported it gets a bullet for his trouble. I lived it and know a lot about the relationship.

Cops frequently protect the drug dealers?

Sorry, I am going to need evidence that cops "frequently" engage in protecting drug dealers.

Have you ever witnessed this?

Or is this just another myth created to deflect from the real dysfunction embraced by a small angry, depressed segment of some black communities?

 

[Elvis Obama]

Cops frequently protect the drug dealers?

Sorry, I am going to need evidence that cops "frequently" engage in protecting drug dealers.

Have you ever witnessed this?

Or is this just another myth created to deflect from the real dysfunction embraced by a small angry, depressed segment of some black communities?

How often do you think they get caught? Who is going to call the cops on the cops?

5 Outrageous Cases of Drug War Police Corruption This Week

 

[AveryJarhman]

Cops frequently protect the drug dealers?

Sorry, I am going to need evidence that cops "frequently" engage in protecting drug dealers.

Have you ever witnessed this?

Or is this just another myth created to deflect from the real dysfunction embraced by a small angry, depressed segment of some black communities?

How often do you think they get caught? Who is going to call the cops on the cops?

5 Outrageous Cases of Drug War Police Corruption This Week

Hello, Elvis.

I questioned Asclepias assertions that cops "frequently" engage in protecting drug dealers.
http://www.usmessageboard.com/members/asclepias.44774/
The story you shared cites individual officers engaging in criminal activity.

Not one of the five stories in the article you shared relates evidence of corrupt police covering up for and protecting drug dealers.

Peace.