In other news...

Discussion in 'Political Satire' started by Ame®icano, Nov 6, 2013.

  1. Ame®icano
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    ... in all the fairness, Michael Phelps, the most decorated Olympian in history, has been asked by Obama administration to redistribute half of his medals to less accomplished athletes. Reason? You didn't swim that!
     
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  2. Ame®icano
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    ... economic chaos continue thru the nation as millions business owners refusing to show up for work. Apparently, after they realized "they didn't build it" they thought Obama is gonna do it for them. Wink. Period. Wink.
     
  3. Ame®icano
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    ... Bill Maher recently suggested that Tea Party members engaged in incest. One source, that wish to remain anonymous, confirmed that Maher's bizarre behavior is result of being dropped on his head by his mother when he was a baby.

    Correction: Another source, that wish to remain anonymous too, said it wasn't his mother that dropped him, but his sister.

    Correction: After re-verification, both sources confirmed that his mother and sister are the same person.
     
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  4. Ame®icano
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    ... the former racist... scratch that. The former Governor... scratch that. The former President Carter crawled out of his hole to attack current President Barry over his use of drones over eliminating "human targets". After all, Carter didn't criticize Barry for his tactics, he just complained there were not enough blacks... scratch that, Jews on his target list.
     
  5. TheOldSchool
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    yo no speak americano
     
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  6. Ame®icano
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    ... while on another of his fundraising trips, President Barry red from teleprompter to his millionaire cronies that his giving up 5% of his salary to show how much "he cares".

    To be "in sync" and to show that she also cares, first lady said the next time she takes her 40+ friends on taxpayers funded vacation, they will stay in only 4.75 star resorts. OMG, she's a giver!
     
  7. Ame®icano
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    ... despite the economic problems he inherited then expanded, President Barry announced $100 million plan to map the human brain. To stay within the budget, they starting with easy subject. Joe Biden.
     
  8. Ame®icano
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    ... after months in silence, scientists confirmed the leak from the White House, that there was a brief panic in the Capitol region after the president's re-election was accompanied by significant seismic activity. I turned out it wasn't an earthquake, just about every of inhabitants in Arlington national cemetery were turning in their graves. Simultaneously.
     
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  9. Ame®icano
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    ... as it turns out, Chevy Volt sales figures are even worse then previously announced, the numbers have been inflated by discount fleet sale. Meanwhile, thanks to bailout, each Volt cost taxpayers nearly a quarter of million dollars. On the plus side, if it doesn't vanish in flames, it could go from 0 to 60...
     
  10. Ame®icano
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    ... recent study reveals, 39% of adults in the border town of McAllen, TX are obese. The remaining 61% didn't answer the door because they thought that pollsters are immigration agents.
     
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