I REALLY need everyone's advice!

[CaffeineKid1988]

Yeah, yeah, I know this sounds retarded, but here goes...

To begin with, I'm 18 as most of you probably already know, and I'm friends with a 13-year-old kid who I'll call Kyle. I'm a little concerned about this kid because he's obsessed with sex and thinks it's just the greatest thing. Hell, I know it's normal for 13-year-old guys to be interested in sex and joke about it from time to time, but Kyle actually makes allegations of having oral sex with his girlfriend and things like that. It used to be a little funny but now I'm really worried that he'll actually do it. I need to hear from parents on the board especially. What should I do about this?

 

[Annie]

Yeah, yeah, I know this sounds retarded, but here goes...

To begin with, I'm 18 as most of you probably already know, and I'm friends with a 13-year-old kid who I'll call Kyle. I'm a little concerned about this kid because he's obsessed with sex and thinks it's just the greatest thing. Hell, I know it's normal for 13-year-old guys to be interested in sex and joke about it from time to time, but Kyle actually makes allegations of having oral sex with his girlfriend and things like that. It used to be a little funny but now I'm really worried that he'll actually do it. I need to hear from parents on the board especially. What should I do about this?

Tell him he'll go blind? If you are 5 years older, tell him why YOU would wait. He probably looks up to you, in some liklihood is trying to impress you-prove how 'close' you really are, maturity wise.

 

[Darwins Friend]

Find a medical site with photographs of various advanced stages of venereal diseases.

 

[Annie]

Find a medical site with photographs of various advanced stages of venereal diseases.

LOL! My son fainted in sophomore year when they showed a film. Out cold for 3 minutes.

 

[90K]

Alright lets be real here for a few....You are 18 and obviously not the usual 18 year old, but would you actually want to hear from adults about something we know nothing about? Now hear me out for a few because what my point is would be why does this bother you so much? Keeping in mind that TV, radio, magazines, net and almost every other form of media and entertainment is filled with sex. Not to mention the word on the street to the youth is that either anal or oral sex is da bomb and you can't get AIDS or any number of diseases that way! Not to mention you can't get prego and it ain't that bad right? So maybe getting Kyle’s mind elsewhere might help for a while but really he's gonna do what he's gonna do. Am I giving in totally to you and his ideas? No but in a society that promotes this thinking and with a government that protects the kids over the adults what can be done here? Besides Kyle getting his azz kicked by some other guy for being a jerk off not much can happen. All I can say is this:
Your life is way in front of you and treat people like you'd want to be treated. I can tell you that these girls aren't running around with any real knowledge of sex in its fullest scale or what can happen. All they want to do is being known as cool by the pack of other kids. Later in life that idea will fade and it won't be cool. Kyle is a selfish turd so until he has a bad experience or is really called down he isn't going to change.
Look I didn't post this stuff to embarrass you or anyone else. See I have a 15 year old daughter who was prego and well she ain't anymore. All my values I tried to reasonably put out and show here are gone, my values keep getting lower and lower because of society and it's overbearing say in everything. Am I bitter? Not bitter but let down, I can only hope my girl will understand someday what she did was stupid and that we did the best for her to give her life because a young teen girl isn't prepared for raising a child.
One other thing is Kyle does want to fit in to the older crowd and he may be just talking out his azz to be cool?

 

[CaffeineKid1988]

One other thing is Kyle does want to fit in to the older crowd and he may be just talking out his azz to be cool?

That's what I thought at first...but then again, I know what talk sounds like too...

I've heard other kids brag about getting laid, but it was always just them showing off. This kid is real convincing the way he does it, though, and other guys in his class that I've talked to all think the same thing...If he hasn't done it already he will, soon.

 

[Shattered]

Just out of curiousity.. If you're 18, what're you doing running around with a 13 year old? That's a little bizzare...

 

[Annie]

Just out of curiousity.. If you're 18, what're you doing running around with a 13 year old? That's a little bizzare...

That had crossed my mind, but I do remember the 'kids' across the street when I was little, they were jr high/hs. When my brother and I got to about jr high age and were playing sports and stuff, they'd come and 'coach.'

Looking back, they probably spent less than 3 hours a month around us, probably while waiting for their own friends to come around. They did help us out a lot though.

 

[CaffeineKid1988]

Just out of curiousity.. If you're 18, what're you doing running around with a 13 year old? That's a little bizzare...

Actually, it's not as bizzare as you think...my friends range in age from 18 all the way down to 13. And as if the topic of this thread wasn't indication enough...13-year-olds are really not that different from 18 year olds anymore!

 

[Annie]

Actually, it's not as bizzare as you think...my friends range in age from 18 all the way down to 13. And as if the topic of this thread wasn't indication enough...13-year-olds are really not that different from 18 year olds anymore!

Yeah, there is. I'll tell you now, there is a hell of a lot of differnce between a 13 year old and an older 14, more a 15 year old. You are too close to that of which you are addressing.

 

[jillian]

Yeah, yeah, I know this sounds retarded, but here goes...

To begin with, I'm 18 as most of you probably already know, and I'm friends with a 13-year-old kid who I'll call Kyle. I'm a little concerned about this kid because he's obsessed with sex and thinks it's just the greatest thing. Hell, I know it's normal for 13-year-old guys to be interested in sex and joke about it from time to time, but Kyle actually makes allegations of having oral sex with his girlfriend and things like that. It used to be a little funny but now I'm really worried that he'll actually do it. I need to hear from parents on the board especially. What should I do about this?

If the kid is going to be sexually active, he's going to be sexually active, regardless of what you tell him. If you want to do him a favor, encourage him to speak with his parents or other adult he trusts. Absent that, talk to him about safe sex and sexually transmitted disease and tell him that every girl is someone's sister or daughter and is deserving of being treated respectfully.

That's what I would want someone to do for my son when he's older.

 

[Shattered]

Actually, it's not as bizzare as you think...my friends range in age from 18 all the way down to 13. And as if the topic of this thread wasn't indication enough...13-year-olds are really not that different from 18 year olds anymore!

Umm.. No.. It's still pretty bizzare. 18 year olds still babysit for 13 year olds in some cases.

I stand by my original question... What kind of friendship can an 18 year old have with a 13 year old?

 

[Shattered]

That had crossed my mind, but I do remember the 'kids' across the street when I was little, they were jr high/hs. When my brother and I got to about jr high age and were playing sports and stuff, they'd come and 'coach.'

Looking back, they probably spent less than 3 hours a month around us, probably while waiting for their own friends to come around. They did help us out a lot though.

Yeah.. but that's one thing.. Logging on to a message board and posting a message of "concern" about a "13 year old FRIEND" is a little different, IMO.

*shrug*

Maybe I'm TOO old.

 

[glockmail]

If the kid is going to be sexually active, he's going to be sexually active, regardless of what you tell him. If you want to do him a favor, encourage him to speak with his parents or other adult he trusts. Absent that, talk to him about safe sex and sexually transmitted disease and tell him that every girl is someone's sister or daughter and is deserving of being treated respectfully.

That's what I would want someone to do for my son when he's older.

Typical Liberal hogwash.

Tell him that sex outside of marraige is a sin, and he'll go to hell if he does it. Then show him the neighborhoods where all the teenage moms live, for a vision of hell on earth. Explain to him the reality that people who remain focused on getting good grades, go to college, then get married, then have kids and stay married, make up the majority of sucessful and happy people. And sucessful people drive new cars, live in nice neighborhoods and take great vacations.

 

[jillian]

Typical Liberal hogwash.

Someone whose delicate sensibilities are offended by smilies on a messageboard really isn't a judge of healthy sexuality, IMO.

Tell him that sex outside of marraige is a sin, and he'll go to hell if he does it.

Why would I lie to him?

Then show him the neighborhoods where all the teenage moms live, for a vision of hell on earth.

I'd rather teach him about condoms.

Explain to him the reality that people who remain focused on getting good grades, go to college, then get married, then have kids and stay married, make up the majority of sucessful and happy people.

You're confusing issues. Having sex has nothing to do with being successful in school. Abstaining from sex has nothing to do with whether a marriage is going to be successful, since the divorce rates of people who say they've abstained are no different from people who don't.

And sucessful people drive new cars, live in nice neighborhoods and take great vacations.

True. And whether they have a healthy view of sexuality or not has nothing to do with whether or not they have those things.

 

[glockmail]

Someone whose delicate sensibilities are offended by smilies on a messageboard really isn't a judge of healthy sexuality, IMO...

"Healthy" is the new liberal code word for perverted, apparently.

 

[90K]

"Healthy" is the new liberal code word for perverted, apparently.

2 friends

 

[glockmail]

2 friends

We have a "healthy" relationship.

 

[boedicca]

Talk to his parents - it is their job to teach him values and about appropriate behavior for his age.

You are now a legal adult - and getting involved is not legally smart for you.

 

[90K]

We have a "healthy" relationship.

indeed you do