How Do You Know When You're in Love?

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by froggy, Jul 12, 2010.

  1. froggy
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    froggy Gold Member

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    FOXSexpert: How Do You Know When You're in Love? - Health News | Current Health News | Medical News - FOXNews.com


    Does any of this ring a bell?

    You’re suddenly shy, at least initially. Even the most confident can feel timid, anxious, awkward, and even fearful around a crush. You may turn pale, flush, tremble, stammer, sweat, feel dizzy, breathe faster, get weak in the knees and have “butterflies in your stomach.” While such symptoms are flu-like, you’ve been struck with no more than a love bug.

    You’re suddenly manic. You may have lost your appetite or find yourself sleepless, yet feeling totally energized, even hyperactive. Know that you have your brain to blame. Elevated concentrations of dopamine, and its chemical derivative norepinephrine, are basically hijacking your brain, lowering your serotonin levels. These neuron-transmitters, known as monoamines, are what make us feel loopy with love.

    You’re obsessed. Your “love object” has taken on what psychologists call a “special meaning.” This sweetie has become unique, novel, and all-important — the center of your universe. You are infatuated, focusing your energy and passion on every little thing associated with your honey.

    Elevated levels of dopamine in your brain make for more focused attention and motivation in directing and attaining your amour goals. You are consumed with “intrusive thinking,” fantasizing and daydreaming constantly about your beloved. One survey found that the love-obsessed reported thinking of their beloved for more than 85 percent of their waking hours. Not surprisingly, couples can describe how they fell in love with each other years later.

    You’ve changed. You may find that you’re revamping yourself. Between your clothing style, mannerisms, habits, and even values, you’re willing to do almost anything and everything to win your loved one’s affections.

    You’re on the ride of your life. Until the relationship offers security, you may feel like you’re on a roller coaster. When things are good, you’re on “cloud 9.” But if a loved one is unresponsive right away, indicates something negative, seems indifferent ... basically, does anything to rattle you, you may feel despair, depressed, rage, mopey and listless until the situation is resolved. In Fisher’s survey, 79 percent of men and 83 percent of women reported dissecting an adored one’s actions.

    You’re sporting rose-colored glasses these days. Passion makes for perfect. While the love-struck can name faults their love object has, unlike the rest of us, they see these defects as charming and endearing. Love is blind. And you are willing to go to great lengths to make sure that the illusion you’ve created remains unscathed.

    You have no desire for anyone else. You want sexual and emotional union with your one and only. Yet while lust — the craving for sexual gratification — is a major player in your passion pursuits — the desire for sex and monogamy are less important than the desire for an emotional union. Men and women ache to have their love returned more than anything.
     
    Last edited: Jul 12, 2010
  2. Ringel05
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    Ringel05 Diamond Member

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    How Do You Know When You're in Love?

    I get hard. I'm in love a lot.......
     
  3. Truthmatters
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    Truthmatters BANNED

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    Love is easy

    Love that lasts takes more brains than many have.
     
  4. Barb
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    Barb Carpe Scrotum

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    Last edited: Jul 12, 2010
  5. masquerade
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    masquerade positivity

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    You had me at 'ache'.
     
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  6. AquaAthena
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    AquaAthena INTJ/ INFJ

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    How Do You Know When Youre In Love?

    If those original attractions are still there after six months or so, then you just might know you are in love.

    "Being in love is not finding a perfect person, but finding an imperfect person perfect."
     
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  7. p kirkes
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    p kirkes VIP Member

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    Gee, take a simple thing and make a mountain out of it. In my experience love grows and it takes a long period of time, otherwise I think it's more infatuation. But even that is a powerful emotion.

    The initial stages are more driven by self gratification with someone you can trust. Then as you know the person you begin to care for them and want what's good for them and on it goes.

    My initial feeling after the wedding ceremony was "wow, this girl has entrusted her life to me, placed her happiness and well being in my hands, Pat, you better not screw it up".

    My wife and I have been married for 47 years and I'm more in love, and loving her more as our lives unfold. Now marriage, per se, does not hinge on love nor does love hinge on marriage. I use the example to illustrate that our love will last until death overtakes us.

    Each stage of our lives together brings a different kind of appreciation and experience in our love.

    There are constants in a loving relationship, selflessness, wanting to make the other happy, caring for the other, sharing the sexual and spiritual experiences that only one close to you personally can.

    Aw gee, here I go making a mountain out of a mole hill. LOL
     
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    Last edited: Jul 12, 2010
  8. masquerade
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    masquerade positivity

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    Very nice AquaAthena.

    Moments of comfortable silence.
    Laughter.
    Enjoying time spent together.
    Smiles.
    Warmth.
     
  9. trams
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    trams Active Member

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    When she tells me I am!
     
  10. FLGoldilocks
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    FLGoldilocks Member

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    As simplistic as it sounds, I think you just know. My boyfriend and I knew on our second date that we were falling in love with each other. Took us another week and a half to say it, but we knew. Neither of us could have explained exactly why, but we knew it was there. And we've had our rough patches, for sure, moments when one or both of us wondered how the hell we were ever going to make this work, but that love was always there. Sometimes, love was what held us together until things got better. I think trying to define love and how to recognize it can be hard. It means different things to different people, and can be expressed in different ways. Even for the same person, it can be different in different relationships. I had the same boyfriend from 8th grade to after high school graduation. I loved him, for sure. He was a great guy. But to look at the love I felt for him, and the love I feel for my boyfriend, they are totally different. My maturity level and what I was looking for at these two separate times in my life had quite a bit to do with the differences, but it's also the fact that they are two totally different men, which means the love I feel/felt for them is naturally going to be different. If you try to put requirements on it (I'll know I'm in love when A, B, and C), you could just end up overlooking the love of your life.
     

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