Hillbilly Dayvorce

Discussion in 'Humor' started by Johnney, Apr 15, 2004.

  1. Johnney
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    Johnney Senior Member

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    A hillbilly farmer who wanted to get a divorce paid a visit to a
    lawyer. The lawyer said, "How can I help you?" The farmer said, "I want
    to get one of those dayvorces."
    The lawyer said, "Do you have any grounds?" The farmer said, "Yes, I got
    40 acres."
    The lawyer said, "No, you don't understand. Do you have a suit?" The
    farmer said, "Yes, I got a suit, I wears it to church on Sundays."
    The lawyer said, "No, no, I mean, do you have a case?" The farmer said,
    "No, I ain't got a Case, but I got a John Deere."
    The lawyer said, "No, I mean, do you have a grudge?" The farmer said,
    "Yes, I got a grudge, that's where I parks the John Deere."
    The lawyer said, "Does your wife beat you up or something?" The farmer
    said, "No, we both get up at 4:30."
    The lawyer said, "Is your wife a nagger?" The farmer said, "No, she's a
    little white gal, but our last child was a nagger and that's why I wants
    a dayvorce.
     
  2. Jmarie
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    Jmarie Member

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    :cof:
     
  3. _dmp_
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    _dmp_ Member

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    A West Virginia Dad took his teenage daughter in for a check up.

    Doctor: How old is your Daughter?
    HillBilly: 15
    Doctor: Is she sexually Active?
    HillBilly: She just sort of lays there, like her mother.
     
  4. jimnyc
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    jimnyc ...

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    Sick, dmp, but that's why I love it! :laugh:
     
  5. NewGuy
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    In some nations, that would be fact, not humor.

    I often wonder if age in our nation should be discarded as a factor down to or up to some proven number based on maturity, intellect and age.

    Seems some adults are far less qualified to be such than some 17 year olds.
     
  6. Johnney
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    Johnney Senior Member

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    you got that right, there are jsut some people who dont need to be procreating!
     
  7. musicman
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    musicman Senior Member

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    Q: What does a West Virginia virgin say?



    A; "Get up off me, Daddy--you're crushin' my cigarettes!"
     
  8. 5stringJeff
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    5stringJeff Senior Member

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    Interesting you would bring that up. I was thinking about that on the way to work, while listening to the Lex and Terry Morning Show (not necessarily safe for work). Anyway, they worship the Olson twins, who turn 18 in a few weeks. So they are throwing a huge Olson Twins birthday party in Las Vegas to celebrate their "legality."
    However, in most states, the age of consensual sex is less than 18. In Washington, it's 16. In Hawaii, it's 14 (or was until very recently). In many southern states, it's 14-15. Why, then, is 18 considered the "legal" age?
     
  9. NewGuy
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    I was told, (and I don't believe it can be proven) that Mary and Joseph were supposed to be LESS than 17 when they hooked up. -It would then make an interesting note about our society and how we determine LEGAL if that were true.

    I know we are getting way off the humor topic, but it really makes you wonder how logical our system is when the variables are so many.
     
  10. Hobbit
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    Hobbit Senior Member

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    It was a difference culture and many marriages were arranged by the parents. There was also the fact that a couple saw marriage as forever, rather than the divorce ridden society we have now. In today's society, we have deemed that children can't make that kind of decision by themselves until they're 16 or 18, dependant on the state. It's still o.k. with parental permission, but 14 is a bit early to be picking a soul mate.
     

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