Hi Ho the Kerry Oh, the Farmer In the Dell

[Annie]

http://www.polipundit.com/

Democratic Self Parody: Independence Day Edition

If you're drinking something, swallow.

Otherwise, you're liable to mess up your monitor.

Ahem.

John Kerry stumped in Wisconsin on July 3rd.

1) He regaled a crowd -- a whopping 100 people -- with a yarn about working the land in rural Massachusetts, in his youth, with a John Deere tractor.

Aftewards, however, his presumably ashen-faced spokeswoman, Stephanie Cutter, had to clarify that, during the time period in question, Johnny Tumbleseed's parents "lived in Europe and he attented boarding school in Switzerland." (Emphasis added.) The Tom Joad experience to which Kerry made reference, according to Ms. Cutter, occurred when Johnny "returned to Massachusetts on vacations." (Emphasis added.)

Uh, huh.

2) A couple of years ago, Senator Kerry supported an agricultural policy that benefited Northeastern dairy farmers at the expense of mid-Western farmers, e.g., ones located in the great State of Wisconsin. In fact, the policy in question was so controversial in the mid-West, its renewal was blocked by one of Kerry's fellow Democratic Senators, Herb Kohl, who hails, ironically enough, from Wisconsin.

Of course, all that happened before Kerry got the absurd idea to run for President. Now that he is so running, and Wisconsin is a state that he cannot possibly afford to lose (who knew?), Senator Kerry was forced to pander to the agricultural vote therein, by (shocker!) renouncing his prior support for the dairy policy in question. In explaining his flip flop, Kerry is quoted as saying:

"I plead guilty. I did vote for it, because I represented Massachusetts. I was a United States Senator, and I was working in a context that we were living in a number of years ago, and that's the way we saw the world."

You literally couldn't script all this for an uproarious political satire, could you???

P.S. - See the article here for a more complete summary.

Note: Hat tip - Viking Pundit (vikingpundit.blogspot.com)

posted by Jayson at 10:48 PM

 

[William Joyce]

Ah, hardscrabble blue-collar life in... Massachussetts.

Right.

Kinda like how Al Gore once smelled pig shit in Tennessee. "Please wipe it off my shoes," he instructed his servant.