Gunny takes a business trip

[manifold]

Gunny was away on a business trip one week and decided that he was far enough away from home that he was willing to get a little crazy and visit a prostitute. The hotel concierge told him where to go so off he went. At the appropriate street corner he saw a remarkabley beautiful woman and she approached his vehicle. Gunny said "I've never done this before and all I have is $100, what can I get for that?" The prostitute says, well normally nothing, but since you're a newbie, I'll give you a handjob for $100." "$100 bucks for a handjob?" Gunny exclaims? "Is it really worth that much?" The prostitute says "You see that pimped out escalade parked over there, I paid for that out of hand-job money alone." Gunny says "ok," and pays the $100. Turns out its the most satisfying sexual experience of Gunny's life and he's immediately smitten. So Gunny arranges another trip to the same city as soon as he can, several weeks later, and returns to find her again. He figures if the hand-job was so good, a blow-job would be out of this world. She says, "well, that will cost you $500." Gunny says "WHAT!, $500 for a blow-job, is it really that good?" The prostitute says, "you see this block of apartment complexes? I own those and I paid for it all with blow-job money alone." So Gunny agrees and again he is not disappointed. It was everything he imagined and then some. Gunny decided to extend his trip and go back to see her the next day. He decided that if the hand-job and blow-job were so good, actual intercourse must be total nirvana. Gunny say's to the prostitute, "how much for full blown intercourse?" And the prostitute replies, "you see that skyline and all those high-rise buildings? Well, if I had a pussy I'd own all that!"

 

[dread]

 

[Ravi]

Hey, at least Shogun is gainfully employed.

 

[manifold]

Hey, at least Shogun is gainfully employed.

 

[Gunny]

Gunny was away on a business trip one week and decided that he was far enough away from home that he was willing to get a little crazy and visit a prostitute. The hotel concierge told him where to go so off he went. At the appropriate street corner he saw a remarkabley beautiful woman and she approached his vehicle. Gunny said "I've never done this before and all I have is $100, what can I get for that?" The prostitute says, well normally nothing, but since you're a newbie, I'll give you a handjob for $100." "$100 bucks for a handjob?" Gunny exclaims? "Is it really worth that much?" The prostitute says "You see that pimped out escalade parked over there, I paid for that out of hand-job money alone." Gunny says "ok," and pays the $100. Turns out its the most satisfying sexual experience of Gunny's life and he's immediately smitten. So Gunny arranges another trip to the same city as soon as he can, several weeks later, and returns to find her again. He figures if the hand-job was so good, a blow-job would be out of this world. She says, "well, that will cost you $500." Gunny says "WHAT!, $500 for a blow-job, is it really that good?" The prostitute says, "you see this block of apartment complexes? I own those and I paid for it all with blow-job money alone." So Gunny agrees and again he is not disappointed. It was everything he imagined and then some. Gunny decided to extend his trip and go back to see her the next day. He decided that if the hand-job and blow-job were so good, actual intercourse must be total nirvana. Gunny say's to the prostitute, "how much for full blown intercourse?" And the prostitute replies, "you see that skyline and all those high-rise buildings? Well, if I had a pussy I'd own all that!"

Obviously, Manifold doesn't know how notoriously cheap Gunny is. I can put that $100 in one pocket, cut a hole in the other and give MYSELF a handjob.

 

[dread]

Obviously, Manifold doesn't know how notoriously cheap Gunny is. I can put that $100 in one pocket, cut a hole in the other and give MYSELF a handjob.

 

[CrimsonWhite]

Obviously, Manifold doesn't know how notoriously cheap Gunny is. I can put that $100 in one pocket, cut a hole in the other and give MYSELF a handjob.

 

[jreeves]

Obviously, Manifold doesn't know how notoriously cheap Gunny is. I can put that $100 in one pocket, cut a hole in the other and give MYSELF a handjob.

 

[RetiredGySgt]

Playing pocket pool, wait didnt you say you were on hormones at one time, doesn't that shrivel your thing?

 

[Gunny]

Playing pocket pool, wait didnt you say you were on hormones at one time, doesn't that shrivel your thing?

Hormones? I ain't some chick, dude.

And I don't know a DAMNED thing about any shrivelling unless the water's real cold.

 

[RetiredGySgt]

Hormones? I ain't some chick, dude.

And I don't know a DAMNED thing about any shrivelling unless the water's real cold.

Made me think of that Seinfeld episode where poor George gets seen after a dip in the cold water and his girlfriend leaves in the middle of the night to drive all the way back to the city.

Hormones was a nice word for the stuff you said you once took.

 

[manifold]

Made me think of that Seinfeld episode where poor George gets seen after a dip in the cold water and his girlfriend leaves in the middle of the night to drive all the way back to the city.

Elaine: It shrinks?

Jerry: Like a frightened turtle!

Hormones was a nice word for the stuff you said you once took.

Enzyte?

 

[Gunny]

Made me think of that Seinfeld episode where poor George gets seen after a dip in the cold water and his girlfriend leaves in the middle of the night to drive all the way back to the city.

Hormones was a nice word for the stuff you said you once took.

Think you might have confused what I said. I have NEVER taken anything that required a prescription, nor that I could not buy at Great Earth or GNC.

I've discussed anabolic steroids and am knowledgeable about them only because they were a choice when I was coming up, but I chose to not use them. Not for any moral reason, but because I didn't want something out of a jar that would go away if the jar did.

LMAO. Way to turn the humor section serious.

 

[Gunny]

Elaine: It shrinks?

Jerry: Like a frightened turtle!




Enzyte?

LMAO ... WTF is THAT?

 

[Paulie]

LMAO ... WTF is THAT?

Enzyte?

It's that TV-advertised remedy for having an overly small penis.

You know, the one where "bob" is sitting by the pool, and his wife sees that because he's currently taking Enzyte, he's now finally enough of a man for her to indulge in a subsequent sexual encounter with him?

 

[Gunny]

Enzyte?

It's that TV-advertised remedy for having an overly small penis.

You know, the one where "bob" is sitting by the pool, and his wife sees that because he's currently taking Enzyte, he's now finally enough of a man for her to indulge in a subsequent sexual encounter with him?

No, but I can understand why I don't know what it is ... things being on a "need to know basis" that is.