G.T.: "Bad Burn" rough draft

Discussion in 'Music' started by G.T., Jan 24, 2011.

  1. G.T.
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    G.T. Diamond Member

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    SoundClick artist: GT2008 - page with MP3 music downloads

    Click "play hi fi" to listen. Thoughts and suggies are welcome. :razz:

    Edited to add lyricS:

    i sit alone and i'm visioning a combat...//thinkin if the victims who've inflicted me were thinkin i forgot that//
    i'd say my bitterness is down pat// victim of forgiviness nah, he's not that..//... wasn't in the contract.//...i got a vision like a contact// sittin in his throne wit a top hat, taxes in the top bracket.//...we all dream of being big like tom hanks//we either earn it and deserve it or we rob banks...//..i dont do music just to prove that its a hot track..//...i want it bumpin when my pulse line..//.. drops flat.//...i like to be outside the box, in the abstract// not in the box, cuz in the box, doesn't have jack..//..i'm on the edge with my enemies a tad back// back against a wall because theyre trainin just to stab backs..//..we all dream that there's a greener grass else-where// 95% of us are barely past welfare

    you needa stay positive about it, no need to be robotic, feed your weakness with a week's of steepin deeper in a chronic.....obsession wit your chronic...depression....this demonic posession by the devil has a bad burn

    i was sittin all alone in a dark room// cellar wit no carpet listen hard because theyd drink and then they'd argue.//...i'd try to fade into some cartoon//....wishin they'd forgive and let it live and then on me.... they wouldn't start too..//..but then they did like i'm a target for some dark bruise//....down, face the wall, on my knees that i was brought-to.//...hand around my neck i thought i'm dead till i was brought-to..//...yellin at em threats like//....this is gunna cost you..//..my mother watchin, in my heart, was like a harpoon.//....i'm full a thunder case you wonder, i'm a dark dude.//..., i'm a mess, and yes... i can get crude.//...messin wit my temper best remember what i been through...//..i still remember the december that i marked you..//...i'm gunna let ya know the pain that i can't lose..//..forced 2 soon, from a child to a man's shoes...//..best believe that when ya see me that it's bad news

    chorusx2
     
    Last edited: Jan 24, 2011
  2. Paulie
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    Paulie Platinum Member

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    HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT!!

    I think this is my favorite yet from you. This is the best you're vocal has fit over a beat you chose, too. Hot beat, hot flow with nothing to criticize at all, and great lyrics.

    If I could possibly make any negative critique at all, so to speak, it would be maybe on the chorus you should put a little more inflection and range in your voice, for more feeling, just to kind of change up the mood between the verses. If I was there with you in person I could give you a specific example, it's kind of hard on here.

    But definitely your best work so far. It fucking BETTER be for how long since your last track :D
     
    • Thank You! Thank You! x 1
  3. G.T.
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    G.T. Diamond Member

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    Thanks for the feed, Paulie.

    When I do my final cut, I'll def put more umph in the chorus. I agree with you 100%.

    That 2nd verse came out the cuts.....I was high on coffee when I jotted it down a little while ago.
     
  4. G.T.
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    G.T. Diamond Member

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    Would you whisper it in my ear, or......?

    :lol:

    How's being single doggy? Should have time to come chop it up
     
  5. G.T.
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    G.T. Diamond Member

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    I edited this to add the lyrics so pple could listen along if they've got old slow ears. boink!
     
  6. Paulie
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    Paulie Platinum Member

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    And I think the 2nd verse shit all over the first, too.
     
  7. G.T.
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    G.T. Diamond Member

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    Is that a Bledsoe Jersey?
     
  8. Paulie
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    Paulie Platinum Member

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    I don't think so. Bledsoe was 11. I can't make out what the first number is, but it's defintiely not a 1.
     
  9. G.T.
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    G.T. Diamond Member

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    oh that aint you?
     
  10. Paulie
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    Paulie Platinum Member

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    Nah dude, I'm cooler :lol:
     

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